Its kinda funny, we find them by accident! We found the Carriage Inn and Meander Inn that way.
The proprieters of the Carriage Inn were very, very nice. While chatting with them at breakfast, turns out he was retired and knew my old boss at Pax River. Small world. We also ate dinner at a place they recommended, the Yellow Brick Bank, it was very good!
We found the Meander Inn one weekend we decided to go wine tasting and unbeknownst to us, it was also graduation at the University in Charlottesville, so we had to travel away because there were no rooms anywhere to be had in town. Very nice and quiet place. We stayed in one of the guest cottages and not in the actual house. Can't remember where we ate dinner. The propriators recommend a place that was good.
Edgewood Plantation I went to last April with my sister and another friend. We ditched the hubby's and kids for a Mommy's weekend away. It looks just like the web site, there is SOOOO much stuff to look at, you will never see it all! The husband and wife that run the place are sooo very nice and warm people. She is a bit eccentric, but not in a bad way at all. He is very laid back and easy to talk to. Beautiful house, we had the top third floor all to ourselves.
Magnolia Moanor is another in Williamsburg, we fell into.
http://www.magnoliamanorwmbg.com/frames.htm
The other I have stayed at were nothing to special or in California.
Good Luck!