Confessions of a Serial Road Killer

[rhumbpunch]

On the night of October 19th, the following crimes were perpetrated against three members of the animal kingdom:

A blur, a smack on the windshield, and a fury creature embedded in the winshield wiper. Driver 1, Bat 0. Was going to let the creature stay on the wiper for a halloween prop, but since it was raining, on with the wipers off with the bat.

Passenger was heard saying; "Guess your echolocator didn't help you avoid the car, there batman"

Coming around the corner, raccoon in the road, swerve, brakes, thump, thump. Driver 2, Raccoon 0.

Ten more miles down the road, Rut Roe, Possum, dang he's moving slow, swerve, thump, thump. Driver 3, Possum 0.

Two miles to my destination, thought to self. Self, All I need is a deer and I will have a trophy night without firing a shot!

To the animal Gods, I confess my transgressions, and ask forgiveness for taking out three of your brethren.

 

[Ken King]

On the night of October 19th, the following crimes were perpetrated against three members of the animal kingdom:

A blur, a smack on the windshield, and a fury creature embedded in the winshield wiper. Driver 1, Bat 0. Was going to let the creature stay on the wiper for a halloween prop, but since it was raining, on with the wipers off with the bat.

Passenger was heard saying; "Guess your echolocator didn't help you avoid the car, there batman"

Coming around the corner, raccoon in the road, swerve, brakes, thump, thump. Driver 2, Raccoon 0.

Ten more miles down the road, Rut Roe, Possum, dang he's moving slow, swerve, thump, thump. Driver 3, Possum 0.

Two miles to my destination, thought to self. Self, All I need is a deer and I will have a trophy night without firing a shot!

To the animal Gods, I confess my transgressions, and ask forgiveness for taking out three of your brethren.

Just a thought, quit swerving and some of these critters might have a better chance, except Batman of course (Did you have music playing really loud that confused or called out to him?).

 

[Jameo]

 

[KCM]

On the night of October 19th, the following crimes were perpetrated against three members of the animal kingdom:

A blur, a smack on the windshield, and a fury creature embedded in the winshield wiper. Driver 1, Bat 0. Was going to let the creature stay on the wiper for a halloween prop, but since it was raining, on with the wipers off with the bat.

Passenger was heard saying; "Guess your echolocator didn't help you avoid the car, there batman"

Coming around the corner, raccoon in the road, swerve, brakes, thump, thump. Driver 2, Raccoon 0.

Ten more miles down the road, Rut Roe, Possum, dang he's moving slow, swerve, thump, thump. Driver 3, Possum 0.

Two miles to my destination, thought to self. Self, All I need is a deer and I will have a trophy night without firing a shot!

To the animal Gods, I confess my transgressions, and ask forgiveness for taking out three of your brethren.

 

[rhumbpunch]

Just a thought, quit swerving and some of these critters might have a better chance, except Batman of course (Did you have music playing really loud that confused or called out to him?).

Well he must of been a Zepplin Fan!

I found it very strange, that I would take out three animals in one night, in a two hour span. Hence the post.

Besides I haven't hit a critter since Easter 1995, when I took out a

 

[Ken King]

Well he must of been a Zepplin Fan!

I found it very strange, that I would take out three animals in one night, in a two hour span. Hence the post.

Besides I haven't hit a critter since Easter 1995, when I took out a

Well considering your past record you should be good now until about 2022.

 

[rhumbpunch]

Well considering your past record you should be good now until about 2022.

So what's your record for critter take downs in one day...
(Wait, New Rules... gentler)

OT,

Have you ever been involved in an Animal Accident ? If so, How many creatures lost thier live(s)?

 

[Ken King]

So what's your record for critter take downs in one day...
(Wait, New Rules... gentler)

OT,

Have you ever been involved in an Animal Accident ? If so, How many creatures lost thier live(s)?

With a car or via any means?

With a car I don't remember any more then one per any given day.

 

[rhumbpunch]

With a car or via any means?

I'll pick door #2, "via any means".

 

[Ken King]

I'll pick door #2, "via any means".

Three or four seasons ago I got four deer within 15 minutes (after freezing my butt off for five hours). Started shooting and they just kept coming.

 

[Ken King]

Oh yeah, the wife has done better. Right after we started dating I was following her home and she struck an opossum killing it and the seven little ones that were traveling on its back. They went everywhere.

 

[rhumbpunch]

Three or four seasons ago I got four deer within 15 minutes (after freezing my butt off for five hours). Started shooting and they just kept coming.

OMG, were the deer swerving?

 

[Ken King]

OMG, were the deer swerving?

For a few moments and bleeding too.

 

[rhumbpunch]

Oh yeah, the wife has done better. Right after we started dating I was following her home and she struck an opossum killing it and the seven little ones that were traveling on its back. They went everywhere.

Guess she had a few bad days. Must of been a good thing, your still together.

Tell the misses, no more bowling for possums.

 

[Ken King]

Guess she had a few bad days. Must of been a good thing, your still together.

Tell the misses, no more bowling for possums.

It shook her up pretty bad and she rarely if ever drives after dark anymore (my laughing and saying "Wow did you see that" didn't help much either). I don't think she handles bug-splatter very well after that either.

 

[rhumbpunch]

Jazz offers insight on the matter, proving these little suckers are crazy!

Quote:
"The poor animals, but I swear they become little kamikaze things in the fall ~ jazz"

 

[KCM]

Umm...I hit two butterflies and a turtle all in one afternoon. Does that count?

 

[rhumbpunch]

Umm...I hit two butterflies and a turtle all in one afternoon. Does that count?

Depends, all at once in a group, or one at a time?

 

[KCM]

Depends, all at once in a group, or one at a time?

Well the butterflies were together shortly followed by a thump and then hence the squished turtle on the road.

 

[BuddyLee]

Oh yeah, the wife has done better. Right after we started dating I was following her home and she struck an opossum killing it and the seven little ones that were traveling on its back. They went everywhere.

That reminds me of the time my mother was pulling out of the Subway in L-town and hit a flock of birds. She frantically drove home after the incident. My father had to pick out a good 3 or 4 out of the grill.