Congratulate or Ignore

[morallyright]

Here's the situation: Daughter in Law delivers newborn...(yes still married to son) however child is no relation....do you congratulate her? Ignore the birth totally? Ask why wasn't an announcement in the paper? What would you do?

 

[BadGirl]

Congratulate the mother on the birth of the baby. It's the right thing to do. YOU might not be excited about the new baby, but the mother certainly is excited. Why would you want to ignore something to significant? Seems petty to me......

As for the lack of announcement....perhaps it is a privacy issue for her. She might not want her business out there for the world to see. That doesn't mean that she is not excited about the new baby, though.

Take her a lovely card and a small gift for the baby. You'll feel good for doing so.

 

[vraiblonde]

Here's the situation: Daughter in Law delivers newborn...(yes still married to son) however child is no relation....do you congratulate her? Ignore the birth totally? Ask why wasn't an announcement in the paper? What would you do?

Are you saying that this woman is married to your son, but just had a baby by another man?

 

[DoWhat]

Are you saying that this woman is married to your son, but just had a baby by another man?

You're quick.

 

[rack'm]

You're quick.

That's why Sharon keeps her on as the Admin.

 

[workin hard]

Here's the situation: Daughter in Law delivers newborn...(yes still married to son) however child is no relation....do you congratulate her? Ignore the birth totally? Ask why wasn't an announcement in the paper? What would you do?

I guess your reaction would be based on how your son is reacting to the situation.

 

[rack'm]

I guess your reaction would be based on how your son is reacting to the situation.

Wouldn't his reaction depend on rather the child was conceived before or after they separated? :shrug:

 

[vraiblonde]

You're quick.

Well, she was either cheating on the son, in which case no congratulations are in order, nor should the mother and child even be acknowledged by MIL.

OR the son and DIL are separated with no hard feelings, in which case a nice note would be appropriate.

 

[kwillia]

Here's the situation: Daughter in Law delivers newborn...(yes still married to son) however child is no relation....do you congratulate her? Ignore the birth totally? Ask why wasn't an announcement in the paper? What would you do?

Do you still communicate with you DIL? If so, then of course you acknowledge the baby even if it is nothing more than asking how the baby is doing... if not, then this is a moot question.

 

[Nanny Pam]

Well, she was either cheating on the son, in which case no congratulations are in order, nor should the mother and child even be acknowledged by MIL.

OR the son and DIL are separated with no hard feelings, in which case a nice note would be appropriate.

I agree.

 

[DoWhat]

Well, she was either cheating on the son, in which case no congratulations are in order, nor should the mother and child even be acknowledged by MIL.

OR the son and DIL are separated with no hard feelings, in which case a nice note would be appropriate.

They could be Jeepers.

 

[meangirl]

Do you still communicate with you DIL? If so, then of course you acknowledge the baby even if it is nothing more than asking how the baby is doing... if not, then this is a moot question.

 

[morallyright]

I don't communicate with DIL but I will be seeing her next week and I'm just curious how I should handle the situation. Of course this is the same person that sat a little 7 year old stepdaughter down and told her all about how "her mother" didn't do it right...you are supposed to be married first. Boy would I like to rub that in her face, but I'm trying to do the "right" thing here that's why I'm asking for opinions.

 

[RoseRed]

I don't communicate with DIL but I will be seeing her next week and I'm just curious how I should handle the situation. Of course this is the same person that sat a little 7 year old stepdaughter down and told her all about how "her mother" didn't do it right...you are supposed to be married first. Boy would I like to rub that in her face, but I'm trying to do the "right" thing here that's why I'm asking for opinions.

You sound angry.

 

[rack'm]

I don't communicate with DIL but I will be seeing her next week and I'm just curious how I should handle the situation. Of course this is the same person that sat a little 7 year old stepdaughter down and told her all about how "her mother" didn't do it right...you are supposed to be married first. Boy would I like to rub that in her face, but I'm trying to do the "right" thing here that's why I'm asking for opinions.

Try not to judge her for her past, she'll have to face it soon enough when he daughter gets older.

 

[kwillia]

I don't communicate with DIL but I will be seeing her next week and I'm just curious how I should handle the situation. Of course this is the same person that sat a little 7 year old stepdaughter down and told her all about how "her mother" didn't do it right...you are supposed to be married first. Boy would I like to rub that in her face, but I'm trying to do the "right" thing here that's why I'm asking for opinions.

IMO, if your relationship is "cordial" then a "cordial acknowledgement" works fine. No reason to be snitty if she is still in your life even for brief appearances every now and then. If your son and her have issues, it's probably in your son's best interest that you let him deal with her and you stay out of it...:shrug:

 

[vraiblonde]

IMO, if your relationship is "cordial" then a "cordial acknowledgement" works fine. No reason to be snitty if she is still in your life even for brief appearances every now and then. If your son and her have issues, it's probably in your son's best interest that you let him deal with her and you stay out of it...

I agree with this

 

[pixiegirl]

I agree with this

And I third it!

 

[morallyright]

That's just what I've been doing, keeping my comments and opinions to myself.

 

[rack'm]

That's just what I've been doing, keeping my comments and opinions to myself.

So, tell us when the new born was conceived........