Dating fixer-uppers

[Monello]

I know some people are romantically attracted to the kind of person that would be considered flawed(druggie, drunk, long rap sheet). What makes a person want to or think they can change someone? Who has time and energy for that?

 

[migtig]

People who have unresolved childhood trauma with a parent or sibling. YW.

 

[Misfit]

Poor vrai

 

[Monello]

Poor vrai

This is from another forum that caused me to start this thread. I find these types of people interesting in that they seem to attract a certain type of person. So there must be some underlying cause to their Florence Nightengale syndrome.

I seem to attract the guys that are fresh out of prison, high school drop outs, recovered addicts and or bipolar crazy.

I have only ever dated one guy that had a college degree, which he obtained while incarcerated. Not the same as just being a good guy and doing what you are supposed to right from the start.

Now don't get me wrong, I have attracted guys that are FBI agents or work for the government, but they were looking for fun and not a relationship. I already have more friends than I have time.

Why is this? I was raised by wealthy parents in a rural area. I was the rich kid in high school. I have traveled all over the world and don't come across as trashy in any sense.

link to original post

 

[RoseRed]

Poor vrai

 

[Hank]

Poor vrai

 

[Hank]

This is from another forum .

Awwwww

Cheater!

 

[Grumpy]

Sounds like a stealthy 'hypothetical' post to me.

 

[Monello]

Lucky Monello :

:fixed:

 

[Pete]

As Vrai's BFF I want to stipulate that she has never been "convicted" of anything and pre-trial confinement is not the same as "prison".

 

[Vince]

I know some people are romantically attracted to the kind of person that would be considered flawed(druggie, drunk, long rap sheet). What makes a person want to or think they can change someone? Who has time and energy for that?

I don't do drama and I don't need to fix people. Don't have the time or energy. Some folks definitely have the need to change people. :shrug:

 

[Monello]

As Vrai's BFF I want to stipulate that she has never been "convicted" of anything and pre-trial confinement is not the same as "prison".

And her defense team is make up of some fantastic lawyers.

 

[lucky_bee]

I think one of the main reasons people end up with "fixer uppers" are because they want to feel needed. A person that needs constant help or is considered to be quite flawed will make a person with low self-esteem feel pretty darn good.....at least for a little while. :shrug:

 

[vraiblonde]

As Vrai's BFF I want to stipulate that she has never been "convicted" of anything and pre-trial confinement is not the same as "prison".

Thank you.

And Monello doesn't know about that stuff anyway.

 

[vraiblonde]

I think one of the main reasons people end up with "fixer uppers" are because they want to feel needed. A person that needs constant help or is considered to be quite flawed will make a person with low self-esteem feel pretty darn good.....at least for a little while. :shrug:

I'll go with that. Knight in Shining Armor Syndrome.

 

[Bann]

I think one of the main reasons people end up with "fixer uppers" are because they want to feel needed. A person that needs constant help or is considered to be quite flawed will make a person with low self-esteem feel pretty darn good.....at least for a little while. :shrug:

I cannot identify with the type of person who needs to be needed by a "fixing" their significant other. It seems so foreign to me. :shrug:

 

[RoseRed]

I'll go with that. Knight in Shining Armor Syndrome.

 

[Gilligan]

I know some people are romantically attracted to the kind of person that would be considered flawed(druggie, drunk, long rap sheet). What makes a person want to or think they can change someone? Who has time and energy for that?

Does "well yeah I know all about that long history of stuff she (he) did to those other guys (gals) but there's no waaayyy she'd (he'd) do that to me" syndrome enter in to that somewhere? I've seen more than a few examples of that.

 

[libertytyranny]

I have a friend with this syndrome, and in her case it is absolutely because her self esteem is so low, she thinks that's the best she can do. So she has basically talked herself into that being her "type." I also have two uncles who love crazy. The crazier, the sexier.

 

[PeoplesElbow]

I also have two uncles who love crazy. The crazier, the sexier.

That one is one of those general truths about women. The woman most likely to throw a pot at your head during an argument is also the most likely to be f'ing your brains out 10 minutes later.