Footing the bill!!

[SouthernMdRocks]

Oldest son started college this year. Now maybe I'm just backwards on this but,,, how is it that they will accept my paying for his classes but I don't have the right to know how he is doing in his classes. Is he pissing my money away.. :shrug:
Is it that 18 yo thing now!!!!!
I'm suppose to just cut the ole umbilical cord and bud out!!!

 

[crabcake]

That's jacked up; if you're paying, you should have a right to know.

If I foot the bill for my daughter's education, I WILL know how she's doing, or she can waitress her ass through college.

 

[Vince]

That's jacked up; if you're paying, you should have a right to know.

If I foot the bill for my daughter's education, I WILL know how she's doing, or she can waitress her ass through college.

Sorry, that's not the way it works. I had to learn the hard way. Once they turn 18, you don't have a right to know anything and they (the college) won't tell you anything. You have to get it from your daughter. Another example is medical insurance. I'm still paying my daughters medical bills on my medical insurance, yet if I get a statement in the mail, the insurance company, my insurance co. will not explain a thing. I have to call my daughter to find out. Same with anything else once they are 18 years old.

 

[SouthernMdRocks]

Sorry, that's not the way it works. I had to learn the hard way. Once they turn 18, you don't have a right to know anything and they (the college) won't tell you anything. You have to get it from your daughter. Another example is medical insurance. I'm still paying my daughters medical bills on my medical insurance, yet if I get a statement in the mail, the insurance company, my insurance co. will not explain a thing. I have to call my daughter to find out. Same with anything else once they are 18 years old.

That's what I'm finding out,, oh I'm not liking it! I don't recall it being that way when I was 18..Matter of fact, my parents are still in my business..

 

[Vince]

That's what I'm finding out,, oh I'm not liking it! I don't recall it being that way when I was 18..Matter of fact, my parents are still in my business..

I was on my own working in the steel mills when I was 18. In the military at 20. Of course parents always worry. When my son turned 18 he was a legally handicapped adult and I had to get legal guardianship to do anything for him. Just to take him to the Dr., get medical info, etc. I had to be his legal guardian.

 

[cattitude]

It's all because of the amendments to the Privacy Act and people are being diligent in enforcing them...litigious society...

You just have to have the kid sign a waiver for the school, doctor, etc. to give you information.

 

[SouthernMdRocks]

It's all because of the amendments to the Privacy Act and people are being diligent in enforcing them...litigious society...

You just have to have the kid sign a waiver for the school, doctor, etc. to give you information.

Had one faxed to me yesterday... And whether he knows it or not, he's signing!!

 

[crabcake]

Sorry, that's not the way it works. I had to learn the hard way. Once they turn 18, you don't have a right to know anything and they (the college) won't tell you anything. You have to get it from your daughter. Another example is medical insurance. I'm still paying my daughters medical bills on my medical insurance, yet if I get a statement in the mail, the insurance company, my insurance co. will not explain a thing. I have to call my daughter to find out. Same with anything else once they are 18 years old.

That's all well and good. If my daughter wants me to foot the bill, she'll agree to release the information to me. Or, like I said, she'll waitress to foot the tuition bills. :shrug:

I'm not as worried about the medical side of things ... if she chooses to go on a form of birth control or something, that's personal, and I don't expect her to clear that through me (though I hope to have an open, communicative relationship that she can/will if she wants to). But when she's spending thousands of my dollars a year, you can bet your sweet ass I'll be monitoring my investment!

 

[Vince]

It's all because of the amendments to the Privacy Act and people are being diligent in enforcing them...litigious society...

You just have to have the kid sign a waiver for the school, doctor, etc. to give you information.

Had to get the daughter to do that so I could get the information from my medical insurance co. Before that, all they would do is quote me the Privacy Act statement over the phone.

 

[crabcake]

It's all because of the amendments to the Privacy Act and people are being diligent in enforcing them...litigious society...

You just have to have the kid sign a waiver for the school, doctor, etc. to give you information.

That's exactly what it is! I ran into this in dealing with Tricare. They were going on and on about how since they didn't have a copy of the divorce decree stating I had custody, they wouldn't release medical insurance data to me pertaining to my daughter. Yet they expected me to contact them and let them know all the details of the appts she had, who she saw, contacting the south region, etc. I told them that if I wasn't worthy enough to be given the information to get her care, then I'm not wasting my unworthy time giving them what they wanted, and they could do the research themselves. :shrug:

 

[Dutch6]

Stop paying and I bet you find out a lot of things!

 

[vraiblonde]

how is it that they will accept my paying for his classes but I don't have the right to know how he is doing in his classes.

Most colleges have online accounts for students where they (you) can check their schedule, grades, outstanding monies, etc. Just get her user/pass and you're good to go.

That's how we found out our daughter was flunking half of her classes

 

[Geek]

I say that you should be able to ask your kid and get the truth :shrug:

 

[vraiblonde]

I say that you should be able to ask your kid and get the truth

:snort:

 

[Geek]

:snort:

Seriously, you are a grown adult making the choice to pay for another adult's schooling. Their records are their business.

 

[onebdzee]

I say that you should be able to ask your kid and get the truth :shrug:

quoting Petey "heh"

 

[crabcake]

Seriously, you are a grown adult making the choice to pay for another adult's schooling. Their records are their business.

I wouldn't throw some dough in the stock market to invest and not track its performance. Why is your child's education any different? If that's how you feel, I'll gladly send you my address where you can shoot me a few checks for my "education", and I promise to not report to you on my performance.

 

[Silver20902]

Oldest son started college this year. Now maybe I'm just backwards on this but,,, how is it that they will accept my paying for his classes but I don't have the right to know how he is doing in his classes. Is he pissing my money away.. :shrug:
Is it that 18 yo thing now!!!!!
I'm suppose to just cut the ole umbilical cord and bud out!!!

How about calling and asking your son ie.. "son, how you doing in school?" ie.. "ex I'm concerned, how's (MM) doing in school?".

Excuse me, but your paying? Ask away.. Go to the college as I did.. Age don't matter

 

[Wenchy]

I'm amazed at how parents think children are entitled to a college education.

If you want to pay for it, fine. I say let them earn it on their own.

I'm a wench like that.

Cry when your children party it up, and don't show anything for what you felt was expected from you, and what they took because you allowed them to do so.

They are 18 years old, and can vote. They are adults.

You give them the money to piss away, why wouldn't they?

Waaaaaaaah!

I MIGHT buy burgers from a joint my child is flinging burgers at IF I LIKE IT. Otherwise, I will go to the competitor. I'm a wench like that.

Have parents turned into total wussies?

There are scholarships galore, yet many worry about their child's fundraisers, first car, clothes, dating, and dances.

Get a grip!

 

[BlackSheep]

Oldest son started college this year. Now maybe I'm just backwards on this but,,, how is it that they will accept my paying for his classes but I don't have the right to know how he is doing in his classes. Is he pissing my money away.. :shrug:
Is it that 18 yo thing now!!!!!
I'm suppose to just cut the ole umbilical cord and bud out!!!

Your saying the college won't share that info with you?? Can you share w/us which college this is?