Graduation, well almost

[Pete]

Read this before voting.

So my nephew is supposed to graduate in a couple weeks. Unfortunately the last couple years has been a struggle for my folks (they are raising him) because "Mr. I'm too cool for my own good" has lazed out. He works his job, but is totally disinterested in anything school or home. He barely passed 11th grade and now it has caught up with him. He has 2 classes that are pivotal to graduation. One he can still pass, the other is a lost cause. The result, he will "walk" with his class but will not get a diploma until he passes that class in summer school.

My mother, or as I now call her, "the extra terrestrial alien being" that replaced the strict, button down, ball busting, unrelenting, proponent of personal responsibility, "you got what you deserved too bad for you" woman that I grew up with, is full of excuses for him. I must say I get some joy playing role reversal on her.

In my mind there is no such thing as a "pseudo-graduation" and if I was running things he would be sitting in the front row watching his peers graduate wearing a dunce cap and holding a sign. To be fair, if he went to summer school and passed he would be more than welcome coming back in 2007 and graduating with that class.

So now I get the invitation to his "Pseudo-graduation" and the shindig open house after at the folks house . Unfortunately it is on a Friday and Boy and I will not be able to attend. However there is the matter of the "pseudo-graduation" gift.

I will get the boy something my question is when. Suppose he goes to summer school and has a tantrum and quits and very graduates? I had almost decided to just send something now. Then this morning I called to talk to the "Alien" and nephew answered. I quizzically asked him what he was doing home? he replied, "I will fail first period anyway so I stopped going so I can catch up on my sleep. I go about 930 for 2nd period."

Logically I suppose this makes sense, but the "matter of fact" delivery method pizzed me off.

SO now you can vote.

 

[kwillia]

Pete, this is a "no brainer"... no graduation gift until actual graduation occurs. Heck, it's the same concept of waiting until Chasey and Day hit their one year anniversary before you give 'em a wedding gift... ya know...:shrug:

 

[bresamil]

Read this before voting.

So my nephew is supposed to graduate in a couple weeks. Unfortunately the last couple years has been a struggle for my folks (they are raising him) because "Mr. I'm too cool for my own good" has lazed out. He works his job, but is totally disinterested in anything school or home. He barely passed 11th grade and now it has caught up with him. He has 2 classes that are pivotal to graduation. One he can still pass, the other is a lost cause. The result, he will "walk" with his class but will not get a diploma until he passes that class in summer school.

My mother, or as I now call her, "the extra terrestrial alien being" that replaced the strict, button down, ball busting, unrelenting, proponent of personal responsibility, "you got what you deserved too bad for you" woman that I grew up with, is full of excuses for him. I must say I get some joy playing role reversal on her.

In my mind there is no such thing as a "pseudo-graduation" and if I was running things he would be sitting in the front row watching his peers graduate wearing a dunce cap and holding a sign. To be fair, if he went to summer school and passed he would be more than welcome coming back in 2007 and graduating with that class.

So now I get the invitation to his "Pseudo-graduation" and the shindig open house after at the folks house . Unfortunately it is on a Friday and Boy and I will not be able to attend. However there is the matter of the "pseudo-graduation" gift.

I will get the boy something my question is when. Suppose he goes to summer school and has a tantrum and quits and very graduates? I had almost decided to just send something now. Then this morning I called to talk to the "Alien" and nephew answered. I quizzically asked him what he was doing home? he replied, "I will fail first period anyway so I stopped going so I can catch up on my sleep. I go about 930 for 2nd period."

Logically I suppose this makes sense, but the "matter of fact" delivery method pizzed me off.

SO now you can vote.

One gets a "graduation gift" when they "graduate". My niece who is currently in more college courses than high school courses will get her gift on graduation day.

 

[morganj614]

Pete, this is a "no brainer"... no graduation gift until actual graduation occurs. Heck, it's the same concept of waiting until Chasey and Day hit their one year anniversary before you give 'em a wedding gift... ya know...:shrug:

what Kwillia's schnauzer said

 

[HunterJJD]

beat his lazy azz. How could you throw him a party for doing NOTHING?

I bet she is not telling anyone that they just let him walk and he did not graduate.

 

[Pete]

beat his lazy azz. How could you throw him a party for doing NOTHING?

I bet she is not telling anyone that they just let him walk and he did not graduate.

That was my vote.

I won't even tell you about his car fiasco.

This is living proof that there are specific roles for "parents" and "grandparents" and "grandparents" are not designed to raise their grandkids. In his case it was the best thing but still

 

[bresamil]

That was my vote.

I won't even tell you about his car fiasco.

This is living proof that there are specific roles for "parents" and "grandparents" and "grandparents" are not designed to raise their grandkids. In his case it was the best thing but still

You could have raised him. I'm sure he'd have straightened up then.

 

[Elle]

I'd send a card and then put a note that a savings bond (as in you have to wait for it to mature) will follow once all courses have been completed. Just ignoring his problems and praising him for his tardness will not make him a better person.

 

[Pete]

You could have raised him. I'm sure he'd have straightened up then.

When my folks got him he was 3, I was 21, in the Navy and gone. Couldn't do it.

 

[kwillia]

Pete, this is a "no brainer"... no graduation gift until actual graduation occurs. Heck, it's the same concept of waiting until Chasey and Day hit their one year anniversary before you give 'em a wedding gift... ya know...:shrug:

See what I mean. ...

 

[aps45819]

An unsigned check.
Tell him you'll sign it when he graduates and if it shows up in your bank statement he can learn about the criminal justice system

 

[Pete]

An unsigned check.
Tell him you'll sign it when he graduates and if it shows up in your bank statement he can learn about the criminal justice system

Hmmmmm interesting idea

 

[harleygirl]

Same thing happened with my nephew last year, I did not get him a dayum thing, neither did his parents. No party, gifts, nothing. He went to summer school and got his diploma, and still wanted a party, and my brother told him "too late". Graduation parties are given in May, not August.

 

[aps45819]

Hmmmmm interesting idea

It's a win-win.
If he's the sleezebag you think he is, he'll commit forgery and you can press charges.
If he gets his shyt together and does what he's supposed to do, he'll see a reward.

 

[baileydog]

An unsigned check.
Tell him you'll sign it when he graduates and if it shows up in your bank statement he can learn about the criminal justice system

I like the way you think. Reward and lesson all in one.

 

[aps45819]

Reward and lesson all in one.

It's either/or,
the beauty of it is that it's totally his choice

 

[vraiblonde]

Get this one:

My ex didn't graduate, but got to walk with his class. Big huge party at his folks' house, relatives flying in from all over. He was supposed to make up his F in summer school to get his diploma, but he blew that and ended up with a GED instead. He was delayed entry for the Army, and it screwed him out of his MOS.

Anyway, I think Aps' idea is a stroke of genius!

 

[Shannie0308]

An unsigned check.
Tell him you'll sign it when he graduates and if it shows up in your bank statement he can learn about the criminal justice system

Great idea!! But maybe a voided check rather than unsigned, that way he's not tempted to break the law.

 

[Nickel]

What's up with being allowed to participate in graduation without actually graduating? When I graduated, none of the summer school kids were allowed to participate in any graduation activities, much less walk with everyone else, pretending to graduate. If you weren't getting a diploma, you didn't participate. :shrug:

 

[baileydog]

Great idea!! But maybe a voided check rather than unsigned, that way he's not tempted to break the law.

And maybe you can hold his hand while he crosses the street. He is old enough to know right from wrong.