How tolerant are you?

[Bobwhite]

I am famously intolerant and don't understand why people put up with an endless amount of sht. I learned the hard way that if you're nice to aholes in hopes that they'll be nice too you're just asking for it. Now all someone has to do is indicate they might stab me in the back and out the door they go. Doesn't matter who it is.

Are you a sht taker, and if so why?

I am a "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it" type of person.

 

[vraiblonde]

I pick my battles. But in my observation, you WILL take sht, it is unavoidable. We've discussed road rage-inducing incidents - and at a time in my life, I would get revenge, one way or another, when some a-hole did some life endangering stunt in traffic. When at work, some idiot co-worker plops some crucial bit of work and info on my desk at the last minute, it used to get me all in a lather over it.

A co-worker then asked "when do they NOT do that?". "Never - it's virtually an absolute fact of the universe" "And when have you driven in traffic when someone DIDN'T do some rage inducing stunt - how often?" "CLOSE to never, but just about every day". "How many days go by when some person DOESN'T do something that ticks you off?".

His point was - if your tolerance threshhold is low enough - you're ALWAYS going to be pissed off. But on the other hand, if you ANTICIPATE it and plan accordingly, you'll be much better about it. Carry an umbrella and you won't be cursing the sky.

There's also this - I know I annoy people. I talk too much, I'm a poor listener, I talk about stuff no one wants to hear and I read social cues badly. I am dead certain that I piss people off. I can't expect something from others if I am there myself. Life is going to be annoying, people WILL piss you off, your very best friend will bother you, the people you positively love the most and who love you back WILL do things.

It's not "taking sht" - it's realizing that sht is the way it is.

See, and I rarely get bent with strangers because....who cares? Someone makes an aggressive driving move I have time for, "You ass" to flit through my brain and then they're forgotten. If it's clearly unintentional I don't even give them a "you ass". The lady blocking the grocery aisle - a flicker of annoyance and then, "Excuse me, can I just sneak by you real quick?" Then she's forgotten.

I'm talking more about personal relationships - the relative who always wants something, the friend who puts you down, the co-worker who thinks they can talk to you like you're a dog, the neighbor who tries to boss everyone, the spouse who's always criticizing. That sort of thing.

Just in looking around, people put up with an infinite amount of sht.

I used to put up with an infinite amount of sht and was always having some sort of angst; then I got those people out of my life and man is it peaceful. I have a low tolerance for passive-aggression and don't respond well to bullying.

 

[NOTSMC]

I'm talking more about personal relationships - the relative who always wants something, the friend who puts you down, the co-worker who thinks they can talk to you like you're a dog, the neighbor who tries to boss everyone, the spouse who's always criticizing. That sort of thing.

Just in looking around, people put up with an infinite amount of sht.

I used to put up with an infinite amount of sht and was always having some sort of angst; then I got those people out of my life and man is it peaceful. I have a low tolerance for passive-aggression and don't respond well to bullying.

LOL...that would be talking nice to someone coming from me. I love dogs...people...I can take 'em or leave 'em.

 

[vraiblonde]

LOL...that would be talking nice to someone coming from me. I love dogs...people...I can take 'em or leave 'em.

Yeah, I need a better expression because I talk to dogs like, "You're so pretty! *moosh moosh* Who's the sweet baby?"

 

[Sneakers]

Yeah, I need a better expression because I talk to dogs like, "You're so pretty! *moosh moosh* Who's the sweet baby?"

There's nothing like a baby or an adorable pet to make the most hardened person talk like an idiot.

 

[SamSpade]

I'm talking more about personal relationships - the relative who always wants something, the friend who puts you down, the co-worker who thinks they can talk to you like you're a dog, the neighbor who tries to boss everyone, the spouse who's always criticizing. That sort of thing.

Ok. Then I suppose I just try and block them out or ignore them. I just don’t engage. It’s pointless and they’re not going to have an epiphany.

It’s the ones that are very close - spouse, siblings - those I do pick my battles. When my brother wanted the larger vacation condo for him and his wife while others would have to function with smaller ones with a family of five? Yeah, gave him both barrels. When he wants to give me an American history lesson - just let him.

 

[PrchJrkr]

I guess I'm lucky or just obtuse. I ignore a lot of people, so maybe that's my secret to happiness. I've experienced quite a bit of anguish in my life that has hardened, or softened, me to the point where I really don't give a ****. Life is too short and getting angry at someone isn't going to change the situation one bit.

Long story short, I tolerate stupidity fairly well. I may throw out an idea that maybe there's another way to look at the situation. If they're hell bent on their stance, l walk away and let them live with their ignorance.

 

[CPUSA]

I've been called a Nazi on Reddit

Hell, I've been called a Nazi on here...