I am so APPALLED by my DH

[Tami2red]

And it doesn't mean Dear Husband right now.

I LOVE the show Little People. I got home late tonight. (Worked the closing shift) He was asleep (with the remote in his hand as usual) so I put Little People on. It was a show about them renewing their vows.

He said and I quote "She'll look like a balloon with legs." (Talking about her in her dress)

I got mad. He said "Fine. Whatever." I refused to listen to comments like about them while I watched the show so I just gave him the remote. We've been watching whatever he wanted ever since. (Shows I HATE) I'm so disgusted by his comments and actions ever since. Just seems to be a pattern with him lately.

Am I wrong to be mad and upset by what he said?

 

[acommondisaster]

No.

 

[Blister]

Yes.

 

[Tami2red]

Yes.

So... I'm wrong to be mad and upset by him making fun of a challenged person? REALLY?

 

[Radiant1]

Did your husband say it with all seriousness or while laughing? If he was serious, give him a break, he was just being honest and real about his opinion. If he was laughing, then bitch slap him for enjoying himself at another person's expense.

:shrug:

 

[Tami2red]

Did your husband say it with all seriousness or while laughing? If he was serious, give him a break, he was just being honest and real about his opinion. If he was laughing, then bitch slap him for enjoying himself at another person's expense.

:shrug:

He was being serious. I'm seriously disgusted by his response. They are two of the most amazing people. Yet all he did was judge by appearance. I knew we had some differences of opinion on views, but, REALLY?

I asked him if he would say the same thing about someone in a wheelchair. Or someone born without a limb. He refused to answer.

I'm *hoping* that means he never thought it about that way.

 

[rhenderson]

......He said and I quote "She'll look like a balloon with legs." (Talking about her in her dress)

I got mad. He said "Fine. Whatever." I refused to listen to comments like about them while I watched the show so I just gave him the remote. We've been watching whatever he wanted ever since. (Shows I HATE) I'm so disgusted by his comments and actions ever since. .....

This sounds like an over reaction to an off hand comment. I think you're really angry about something else. If his remarks about a "reality" show actor with whom you have no personal connection caused you so much anger you should examine your own state of mind.

 

[Tami2red]

And you got your psychology degree from where?

Seriously, let me know.

 

[DynaDink]

If you feel so strongly about his disregard for challenged people, why get your shorts in a knot? Divorce him and find a challenged person to begin a happy life with.

 

[Baja28]

If you feel so strongly about his disregard for challenged people, why get your shorts in a knot? Divorce him and find a challenged person to begin a happy life with.

Exactly. This is why women annoy men.

Tami, is THIS really what you wanna get your panties in a bunch about?? Really???? JFC!!

 

[Bann]

And you got your psychology degree from where?

Seriously, let me know.

We all have psychology degrees - that's why you made the statement and openly asked the question on a public message board on an online forum. Isn't it?

How long have you known him? Usually, the character of a person isn't a surprise if you've been around them long enough, so I find it hard to believe it's the first time he has ever made a comment like this. I am with the poster who thinks there is something else wrong and this is the nit you've decided to pick instead.

 

[Tami2red]

Exactly. This is why women annoy men.

Tami, is THIS really what you wanna get your panties in a bunch about?? Really???? JFC!!

It's just soooo RUDE. If he loses his leg tomorrow, then I should just go... "EWWWW" (I pointed that out too.) AND YES! I DO get my panties in a bunch, and will continue to, over disabled people being looked down on.


BTW He apologized. He said he didn't realize how he sounded.

He is a good man. Generally very kind, considerate, caring. Just needs to extend that to EVERYONE.

















(except thugs)

 

[migtig]

I concur. Every once and a while some little trivial thing will set me off. When I take a step back, I realize I'm not actually mad about "x" I'm made about "c", "d", "e" and "g".

Take a step back Tami. Make a list of all the things that you are upset with your husband about and you may find a different issue that you two need to address calmly.

 

[Tami2red]

We all have psychology degrees - that's why you made the statement and openly asked the question on a public message board on an online forum. Isn't it?

How long have you known him? Usually, the character of a person isn't a surprise if you've been around them long enough, so I find it hard to believe it's the first time he has ever made a comment like this. I am with the poster who thinks there is something else wrong and this is the nit you've decided to pick instead.

Known him for years, been with him for years and have NEVER heard him make a disparaging remark about physically challenged people before this. I pointed that out to him.

He told me he hadn't thought of 'little people' as being physically challenged before this.

 

[Tami2red]

We all have psychology degrees - that's why you made the statement and openly asked the question on a public message board on an online forum. Isn't it?

How long have you known him? Usually, the character of a person isn't a surprise if you've been around them long enough, so I find it hard to believe it's the first time he has ever made a comment like this. I am with the poster who thinks there is something else wrong and this is the nit you've decided to pick instead.

I forgot! Silly me!

That IS why I come to this darn place. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Cause I love you guys. (Most of you, anyway. I could name a few exceptions.) I DO value the opinions (Most of them anyway) And you DO give me perspective. I calmed down A LOT after being able to talk to you crazy forumites.

 

[Tami2red]

I concur. Every once and a while some little trivial thing will set me off. When I take a step back, I realize I'm not actually mad about "x" I'm made about "c", "d", "e" and "g".

Take a step back Tami. Make a list of all the things that you are upset with your husband about and you may find a different issue that you two need to address calmly.

If I make another list of ANYTHING he'll probably me.

I'm a uber organized structured list maker planner. Him, not so much.

 

[Bann]

Known him for years, been with him for years and have NEVER heard him make a disparaging remark about physically challenged people before this. I pointed that out to him.

He told me he hadn't thought of 'little people' as being physically challenged before this.

In the grand scheme of things, though - what was wrong with the comment? He only stated that she would look like a balloon with legs, because of the dress, not necessarily because she was a small person. I really don't think that is disparaging(all) small people. I don't watch the program - but it sounds like he was making the comment about the actual garment of clothing and that probably goes to her taste of clothing. Even though it's a blunt comment, it's probably true, since in his opinion, the dress might not have been designed in a flattering way to her size/proportions.

In other words - if she chose something more flattering to her size & stature she might not look like a balloon with legs. :shrug:

Let's face it, just because you CAN wear something, doesn't mean you should.

 

[Tami2red]

In the grand scheme of things, though - what was wrong with the comment? He only stated that she would look like a balloon with legs, because of the dress, not necessarily because she was a small person. I really don't think that is disparaging(all) small people. I don't watch the program - but it sounds like he was making the comment about the actual garment of clothing and that probably goes to her taste of clothing. Even though it's a blunt comment, it's probably true, since in his opinion, the dress might not have been designed in a flattering way to her size/proportions.

In other words - if she chose something more flattering to her size & stature she might not look like a balloon with legs. :shrug:

Let's face it, just because you CAN wear something, doesn't mean you should.

He was asleep when the show came on. The dress was custom made for her to fit her figure and stature (and cover her IV port) and it fit and looked beautiful. He made the comment because he was being an azz. Google it.

 

[Tami2red]

He was asleep when the show came on. The dress was custom made for her to fit her figure and stature (and cover her IV port) and it fit and looked beautiful. He made the comment because he was being an azz. Google it.

 

[Bann]

He was asleep when the show came on. The dress was custom made for her to fit her figure and stature (and cover her IV port) and it fit and looked beautiful. He made the comment because he was being an azz. Google it.

I'm not interested enough to Google it. I was just commenting on the information given. :shrug:

(supposed) Crass comments are crass comments. Doesn't mean he's disparaging an entire segment of society.