Boy, you and she are two peas from the same pod - simplistic ideas from simplistic minds.
There are no “red” and “blue” states. We are a nation of individuals.
And you know what? For once I wholeheartedly agree with you.
There are just a few EXTREMELY blue states - and just a few EXTREMELY red ones.
All of the rest are cyan or magenta - more red than purple or more blue than purple.
And they all at one time, were mostly the other major party. Well most of them.
But there IS a huge divide between urban, and non-urban (I wouldn't say "rural" - Pennsylvania is a blue state, but only for Pittsburgh and Philly - the rest of the state is mostly red, including a formerly blue area where I used to live, in NE PA. Illinoois is a VERY red state - except for Chicago).
CITIES are blue, or tend to be. This tends to follow the Democratic ideal, living in cities, taxes covering needs, government in charge of everything.
Republicans tend to be stronger outside of cities, following a more conservative idea - government covers a few basic needs, but basically, we're fine, leave us alone, we will manage our police, fire, sewer, garbage ourselves - maybe we will ask for help when a hurricane hits.
Hence - you have the often shown county voting map, where but for a few concentrated areas around major MSAs - the entire nation would appear to be red.
There's not going to be a "civil war". There's no boundary, and there's plenty of blue in red states and red in blue states.