If you had a choice...

[CityGrl]

I think with most normal people your kids trump everything. If B made enough money for me to work part time I'd do it in a heartbeat and pick-up my career when both were in school.

For me one of the hardest parts of working is letting someone else raise my kids 8 hours every day. They are the greatest thing I'll ever do. I may do well in my career but let's face it, I'm not going to cure cancer or even make an impact on mankind. Our kids are the most important thing I'll ever do.

Interesting thoughts. I agree that I'm not doing anything that makes me all that excited at the end of the day, but the thought of giving up everything I've worked hard for is difficult. Working part-time would be great, because then I could still enjoy the outside world, and be around for the kids too.

 

[pixiegirl]

Interesting thoughts. I agree that I'm not doing anything that makes me all that excited at the end of the day, but the thought of giving up everything I've worked hard for is difficult. Working part-time would be great, because then I could still enjoy the outside world, and be around for the kids too.

That's what I would do if I had the choice.

 

[BuddyLee]

I'd for sure work part time. I miss my kids terribly while I'm at work. I'd still like to work some though just to have some sort of outlet.

Plus what is that saying to your kids if you're not out trying to make an earnest living.

 

[CityGrl]

Next question then is: how many "good jobs" can you find that are part-time?

For example, I'm a technical writer. Do you think gov't contractors will be willing to hire PT tech writers?

 

[pixiegirl]

Next question then is: how many "good jobs" can you find that are part-time?

For example, I'm a technical writer. Do you think gov't contractors will be willing to hire PT tech writers?

I bet if you have a good repore with your current employer that they'd be more then willing to let you go part time. I've seen it done many times.

 

[CMC122]

Plus what is that saying to your kids if you're not out trying to make an earnest living.

Kids can still learn about working and being responsible if a parent stays home. It's all in what the parent takes the time to teach them.

And staying home is not all fun and games.

 

[BuddyLee]

Kids can still learn about working and being responsible if a parent stays home. It's all in what the parent takes the time to teach them.

And staying home is not all fun and games.

Agreed.

 

[vraiblonde]

As someone who has done all three at some point, I vote to stay home when the kids are small, then go back to work when they go to school. When ours were little, my ex and I rotated - he worked during the day and I worked part time waitressing in the evening. I was home all day with the kids until 5:00, then back home by 9 or 9:30 each night. This worked well for us, although he #####ed about having to make them dinner 3 nights a week. (Note that he is no longer here)


Citygrl, if you are worried about your professional goals, you shouldn't be thinking about children. They will kill your career faster than stripping naked and dancing a hoochie-koo on the breakroom table. You will have to take off time for giving birth, then for their illnesses or school functions, then for whatever else comes up. Childless workers ALWAYS rise up the corporate ladder faster than parents.

You trade the goal of being an unappreciated work grunt for the goal of being an unappreciated raiser of children. The difference is that in 20 or 25 years, your kids will give you back more than you will EVER get from some job.

 

[CityGrl]

As someone who has done all three at some point, I vote to stay home when the kids are small, then go back to work when they go to school. When ours were little, my ex and I rotated - he worked during the day and I worked part time waitressing in the evening. I was home all day with the kids until 5:00, then back home by 9 or 9:30 each night. This worked well for us, although he #####ed about having to make them dinner 3 nights a week. (Note that he is no longer here)


Citygrl, if you are worried about your professional goals, you shouldn't be thinking about children. They will kill your career faster than stripping naked and dancing a hoochie-koo on the breakroom table. You will have to take off time for giving birth, then for their illnesses or school functions, then for whatever else comes up. Childless workers ALWAYS rise up the corporate ladder faster than parents.

You trade the goal of being an unappreciated work grunt for the goal of being an unappreciated raiser of children. The difference is that in 20 or 25 years, your kids will give you back more than you will EVER get from some job.

Very true...

Thanks vrai.

 

[Tina2001aniT]

As someone who has done all three at some point, I vote to stay home when the kids are small, then go back to work when they go to school. When ours were little, my ex and I rotated - he worked during the day and I worked part time waitressing in the evening. I was home all day with the kids until 5:00, then back home by 9 or 9:30 each night. This worked well for us, although he #####ed about having to make them dinner 3 nights a week. (Note that he is no longer here)


Citygrl, if you are worried about your professional goals, you shouldn't be thinking about children. They will kill your career faster than stripping naked and dancing a hoochie-koo on the breakroom table. You will have to take off time for giving birth, then for their illnesses or school functions, then for whatever else comes up. Childless workers ALWAYS rise up the corporate ladder faster than parents.

You trade the goal of being an unappreciated work grunt for the goal of being an unappreciated raiser of children. The difference is that in 20 or 25 years, your kids will give you back more than you will EVER get from some job.

Excellently stated

 

[vraiblonde]

Plus that, babies and young children are sweet and you'll want to stay home with them and play all day. Older children and teenagers are pains in the ass and you'll want to work to escape from them.

 

[kwillia]

I know of as many unprepared young adults that come from "daycare" environments as I do of those that come from environments where a parent stayed home. A parent can fail a child just as well in a full day as they can in a partial day. Parenting is all about what you do with the time you have with your children. It's the effort you put into talking with them and teaching them "life lessons". As a working mom, I take the time to talk about things that go on in my work environment... events that unfold, be they good or bad. My hubby owns his own business. We take the time to involve our son in that. At the age of 12 he understands more about what it takes to run a business than some business majors. I make the most of the conditions we live in. Some folks have "better" conditions and don't bother to do that... I truly believe the answer is all in the "parenting".

 

[CityGrl]

I know of as many unprepared young adults that come from "daycare" environments as I do of those that come from environments where a parent stayed home. A parent can fail a child just as well in a full day as they can in a partial day. Parenting is all about what you do with the time you have with your children. It's the effort you put into talking with them and teaching them "life lessons". As a working mom, I take the time to talk about things that go on in my work environment... events that unfold, be they good or bad. My hubby owns his own business. We take the time to involve our son in that. At the age of 12 he understands more about what it takes to run a business than some business majors. I make the most of the conditions we live in. Some folks have "better" conditions and don't bother to do that... I truly believe the answer is all in the "parenting".

Thanks kwillia

 

[janey83]

Hey CG, I know I'm not a mom, but I'd say that if you really wanted to stay home with the kids for the first few years, then go for it. They're only little once, and you should enjoy that time with them.

 

[CityGrl]

Hey CG, I know I'm not a mom, but I'd say that if you really wanted to stay home with the kids for the first few years, then go for it. They're only little once, and you should enjoy that time with them.

Thanks janey, maybe after I have my first "little CG" sometime in the future, I'll name it after you!

 

[janey83]

Thanks janey, maybe after I have my first "little CG" sometime in the future, I'll name it after you!

Awwww...

 

[kwillia]

For me, it wasn't the infant years I really yearned to be an "at home mom"... it was the early elementary school years that got to me instead. I wanted to be a volunteer mom at the school, I wanted to go on every field trip (I did manage to make most of them!), I wanted to cook them homemade snacks for when they got off the bus (my daycare mom does this most days!), I wanted to give them undivided attention when it came to homework. Both my kids are pretty self-sufficient now, so I don't have those yearnings anymore, but I did from pre-k thru about third grade.

 

[CityGrl]

I guess I'll just wait and see how I feel when the time comes. Excellent advice, everyone!

I really feel like I couldn't totally give up my career, but who knows?

 

[kwillia]

I guess I'll just wait and see how I feel when the time comes. Excellent advice, everyone!

I really feel like I couldn't totally give up my career, but who knows?

Exactly... wait and see what's right for you and your family... the point is you don't have to give up totally on your career to be a successful mother.

 

[CityGrl]

Exactly... wait and see what's right for you and your family... the point is you don't have to give up totally on your career to be a successful mother.

Scary to actually be thinking/talking about all of these things...

I'm growing up.