Insulting a German

[Hello6]

A friend of mine got a job at a doggie "inn". Loves working there but there are a few co-workers, the German one in particular, that delight in giving her a hard time: making comments about her weight and her inability to understand his thick German accent. Other than saying "Eff you" do any of you have any fun retorts?
One of mine was "Hey, Hitler, Eva Braun called and wants you to finish your part of the pact" and "I'm sorry I have trouble understanding you, but I'm not fluent in retard"

Thanks in advance!

 

[Baja28]

She could ask him: "Ever had to defend yourself in a sexual harrassment lawsuit saurkraut?"

 

[vraiblonde]

"Hey, Hitler, Eva Braun called and wants you to finish your part of the pact"

I really like that one

Or she could say, "Remember, Himmler - those dogs don't go in the oven."

 

[vraiblonde]

Tell her to learn German:
http://www.geocities.com/mvea/curses_german.htm

 

[Fishn Guy]

Warum essen Sie meinen dicken Esel nicht?

 

[Tonio]

Tell her to learn German:
http://www.geocities.com/mvea/curses_german.htm

Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: For the experiment to be a success, all of the body parts must be enlarged.
Inga: His veins, his feet, his hands, his organs vould all have to be increased in size.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: Exactly.
Inga: He vould have an enormous schwanzstucker.
Dr. Frederick Frankenstein: That goes without saying.
Inga: Voof.
Igor: He's going to be very popular.

 

[mAlice]

"Remember, Himmler - those dogs don't go in the oven."

I like this one.

 

[Tonio]

Warum essen Sie meinen dicken Esel nicht?

Ist es wahr, dass Hitler nur einen einzelnen Hoden gehabt hat?

 

[Oz]

Other than saying "Eff you"

Understood by all nationalities...

 

[Bogart]

"I saw your mom in a scheizer video last night."

 

[SamSpade]

I really like that one

Or she could say, "Remember, Himmler - those dogs don't go in the oven."

Oh - that reminds me of a REAL situation, once. Growing up in Lancaster, PA, there was this place called the Landis Valley Farm Museum. From time to time, during the year, people would operate all the equipment as though it really was the 18th century.

We were visiting one of the open hearth ovens, and this thick-accented German woman kept saying "oh how DIRRRRTY - oh how UN-sanitary it is!".

My mother wheeled around and snapped at her - "At least we put FOOD in *our* ovens!".

Oooooh how I loved that.

 

[aps45819]

Other than saying "Eff you" do any of you have any fun retorts?

You lost the war so learn to speak English.

Talked to my Dad/Grandpa last night, he said he remembered shooting your dad/grandpa 60 years ago.

 

[Tonio]

We were visiting one of the open hearth ovens, and this thick-accented German woman kept saying "oh how DIRRRRTY - oh how UN-sanitary it is!".

My mother wheeled around and snapped at her - "At least we put FOOD in *our* ovens!".

This was in Lancaster? She was probably Amish. You could have said, "Well, we have ELECTRIC ovens that are self-cleaning, so nyaah!"

 

[SamSpade]

This was in Lancaster? She was probably Amish. You could have said, "Well, we have ELECTRIC ovens that are self-cleaning, so nyaah!"

No, she was clearly foreign, and has up until then made comparisons to her native Germany. We heard her throughout the tour turning up her nose at the whole thing. My mom only snapped because at that point, she'd heard enough.