Screw the terrible 2's

KDENISE977

KDENISE977

New Member
My kid is so much worse as a 3 year old. The whole "NO" phrase is about to drive me ####ing insane. What do you do about the "no's"? seriously? Nothing is working for me, not being nice and "talking", not spanking (no affect), lately...he's being put to bed as early as..well..RIGHT NOW !! Someone please give me the answer because I'm out of them...
 
pebbles

pebbles

Member
not sure what he is telling you no about, like if you want him to do something & he tells you no, I would calmly make him do it. Say you told him to pick up his toys & he said no. Go over to him & assist him with picking up his toys, like physically making his hand pick it up. You could also refuse to do anything with him until he complies. Good Luck! 3 was always worse than 2!
 
JeJeTe

JeJeTe

Happiness
3 was worse than 2 for me too.

If he is telling you "no" to things then he gets isolated until he does the things you request. Consitency is the key. He'll try you a few times. But once he realizes that the answer will always be the same when he tells no...eventually he'll stop because he'll know what is coming.
 
vraiblonde

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
Let me give you the Dodie perspective (which is quite different than what the Mommy perspective was):

Three year olds are a blast. They're so smart and independent, and they are beginning to understand things. They're also hysterically funny. My grandbrat was a riot at 3, when he wasn't being a little chit.

I could channel my inner brat and torment him instead of him tormenting me. Mock him, play copy cat, yell louder than him, etc. He'd whine about something and I'd repeat what he said in a Cartman voice. Made his mother crazy and eventually she'd make me stop, but now she does the same thing to him. :lol:

Riggs: Whine whine whine
Dodie: Shut up
Riggs: YOU shut up
Dodie: No YOU shut up
Riggs: YOU!
Dodie: No YOU!
(Enter Mommy)
We don't say shut up :tap:
Dodie: Oh, shut up
Riggs: :roflmao:

They're fun when they're not your own.
 
Misfit

Misfit

Lawful neutral
I'd always come in and be the heavy. "Don't tell your Mom No!" WACK! then the next time they did it, mom would say "do I need to get your Father?" "NO MOMMY PLEASE DON'T GET DADDY!!!"
 
KDENISE977

KDENISE977

New Member
Misfit said:
I'd always come in and be the heavy. "Don't tell your Mom No!" WACK! then the next time they did it, mom would say "do I need to get your Father?" "NO MOMMY PLEASE DON'T GET DADDY!!!"
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That's reversed in our household... it's always mom the enforcer, the mean one. :mad:
 
ICit

ICit

Jam out with ur clam out
KDENISE977 said:
I'm going to test this theory this weekend !! :cheers: Everytime he tells me NO... I'm doing a shot !!!
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oohhh can i come over and watch!!!

I will take shots with you also... and bring the shock collar and crate...

betcha I can train him faster... :coffee: :love:
 
kwillia

kwillia

n/a
JeJeTe said:
3 was worse than 2 for me too.

If he is telling you "no" to things then he gets isolated until he does the things you request. Consitency is the key. He'll try you a few times. But once he realizes that the answer will always be the same when he tells no...eventually he'll stop because he'll know what is coming.
Click to expand...
:yeahthat: This! I lived it and you need to start this at 3 and expect to follow through for the next 15 years! Seriously, as Vrai stated it is happening because he understands how to take control... it's a normal and wonderful brain development but just the same you need to act now to establish that he is NOT the boss and it's NOT his way or the highway and you do it be follow through and consistency of consequences. Don't argue with him. Don't get spun up and shout or spank. You state the consequence and then when he ignores the rule you follow through... he will quickly catch on. You need to do this for the rest of his childhood and I promise it will pay off because he'll soon realize his choices result in consequences and he is ultimately responsible for what happens in life. My terrible 3-year old is now a full grown 21 year old. I survived (so did he). It can be done!
But now you know why some species in the wild eat their young! :clap: :cartwheel :starcat:
 
JeJeTe

JeJeTe

Happiness
kwillia said:
:yeahthat: This! I lived it and you need to start this at 3 and expect to follow through for the next 15 years! Seriously, as Vrai stated it is happening because he understands how to take control... it's a normal and wonderful brain development but just the same you need to act now to establish that he is NOT the boss and it's NOT his way or the highway and you do it be follow through and consistency of consequences. Don't argue with him. Don't get spun up and shout or spank. You state the consequence and then when he ignores the rule you follow through... he will quickly catch on. You need to do this for the rest of his childhood and I promise it will pay off because he'll soon realize his choices result in consequences and he is ultimately responsible for what happens in life. My terrible 3-year old is now a full grown 21 year old. I survived (so did he). It can be done!
But now you know why some species in the wild eat their young! :clap: :cartwheel :starcat:
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Exactly. I got tired of arguing with him about dinner. "Take one more bite", etc. It exhausted us both. Now there is no arguing. You eat, you get dessert. If you don't, then you don't get it. And stay at that. You choose your fate, kid.
 
kwillia

kwillia

n/a
JeJeTe said:
Exactly. I got tired of arguing with him about dinner. "Take one more bite", etc. It exhausted us both. Now there is no arguing. You eat, you get dessert. If you don't, then you don't get it. And stay at that. You choose your fate, kid.
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Yep! And this method carries on when he hits elementary school. You DO NOT do his homework for him because you don't want it to look bad if he choses not to get it done and goes to school without it or with it incomplete. He needs to get the sad face on his paper or have to stay in the classroom to finish rather than go outside with those who did their work. etc. You want him to learn this in elementary school because the sooner he learns he gets credit for the effort he puts in the better off you both will be when he hits middle school and then high school!

I have to be honest and admit that I learned this from Mrs. Mosley, one of my son's elementary school teachers. When I picked him up from daycare I found out he didn't bring his homework home so I rushed us back to his school so we could get it from his desk. His teacher happened to still be there and she explained to me just what I put in this post to you. She looked me directly in the eye and said, "Are you still planning on doing this when he hits middle school and high school? If not, then let him learn the consequences now." It was the wake-up call I needed. From that point forward his school work and the grades he got on it were his responsibility not mine. Yes I would mentor when needed. Yes I would answer a question when needed, but nope I wouldn't do the work for him nor would I fight him. And you know what... Mrs. Mosley was right.
 
libertytyranny

libertytyranny

Dream Stealer
Three year olds want one thing..power. They want to be boss and to decide what happens and when. So the best thing to remember is not to tell him to do anything unless you plan on and are capable of following through on making him do it. I was late out the door this morning because monster decided she didnt know how to/didnt want to put her shoes on. She has put those shoes on countless times. I knew she could do it and I knew because i pulled rank and told her to put them on right now that I had to follow through. SO while she whined like a baby on the steps pretending she couldnt get her shoe on I told her she was acting like a baby and until she put her shoe on I was going to wait. And further i was going to go outside without her because i didnt feel like hearing her whine. Soon as my hand was on the door..boom. they were on. Like magic. If you understand it is a power struggle and that it is one you HAVE TO WIN in order to not create a brat then it doesnt make it easier to deal with, but easier to understand how it should be handled. monster's power struggles have their days but most times i can get her to do what i need her to do without too much fuss..I get a lot of sass, but she does it :lmao:
 
lucky_bee

lucky_bee

RBF expert
libertytyranny said:
Three year olds want one thing..power. They want to be boss and to decide what happens and when. So the best thing to remember is not to tell him to do anything unless you plan on and are capable of following through on making him do it. I was late out the door this morning because monster decided she didnt know how to/didnt want to put her shoes on. She has put those shoes on countless times. I knew she could do it and I knew because i pulled rank and told her to put them on right now that I had to follow through. SO while she whined like a baby on the steps pretending she couldnt get her shoe on I told her she was acting like a baby and until she put her shoe on I was going to wait. And further i was going to go outside without her because i didnt feel like hearing her whine. Soon as my hand was on the door..boom. they were on. Like magic. If you understand it is a power struggle and that it is one you HAVE TO WIN in order to not create a brat then it doesnt make it easier to deal with, but easier to understand how it should be handled. monster's power struggles have their days but most times i can get her to do what i need her to do without too much fuss..I get a lot of sass, but she does it :lmao:
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Haha your monster is ALWAYS pretending something is "too hard" or she "can't do it" :lol: when we know darn well she knows how. The moment she realizes noone is playing around and her little azz will go to bed without her story or we're leaving without her ...she will quit that game so fast sometimes she even forgets the sass :lmao:
 
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