This is none of my business...

vraiblonde

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
...right? And I'm under no obligation to mention it to my mother or her sisters, right?

Here's the story:

My grandmother died last last January after several years of poor health. My grandfather went to Alaska (where he's from) last month and rekindled a relationship with an old high-school girlfriend who was widowed several years ago. I think it's wonderful because it's not good for people to be alone.

They're only at the "cozy" stage and no plans are being made for the future at this point. I was curious how my Mom was taking this until she called the other day and made me realize that she doesn't know anything about it - Grandpa hasn't mentioned this girlfriend to her at all.

When she finds out, which she will at some point if the relationship moves forward, and calls to rant about it, I will just be calmly supportive of my grandfather, neither confirming nor denying that I knew anything about it.

Because that's the right thing to do, right? Grandpa's love life is his business and because he chose to talk to me about it doesn't mean my Mom and all the rest of them have to know, right? And if my Mom finds out and brings it up, I'm not required to tell her I already knew about it.

Right?
 
Tinkerbell

Tinkerbell

Baby blues
You're right. It's his decision to tells who he wants to tell. He might even get upset if you step over that bounds and tell someone.
 
rack'm

rack'm

Jaded
I'd guess that he chose not to tell your mother for fear of her being upset that's he's nailing some other bag and she may feel he's moved on too fast.
 
BadGirl

BadGirl

I am so very blessed
Clearly, your grandfather feels comfortable talking to you about it. Obviously, he doesn't share that same closeness with your mom, otherwise, he'd be telling her himself.

Keep his news on the lowdown, and when your mom ultimately finds out - and you know she will - continue to be an ally to your grandfather. Hopefully he is finding joy and happiness in his later years.
 
baileydog

baileydog

I wanna be a SMIB
vraiblonde said:
...right? And I'm under no obligation to mention it to my mother or her sisters, right?

Here's the story:

My grandmother died last last January after several years of poor health. My grandfather went to Alaska (where he's from) last month and rekindled a relationship with an old high-school girlfriend who was widowed several years ago. I think it's wonderful because it's not good for people to be alone.

They're only at the "cozy" stage and no plans are being made for the future at this point. I was curious how my Mom was taking this until she called the other day and made me realize that she doesn't know anything about it - Grandpa hasn't mentioned this girlfriend to her at all.

When she finds out, which she will at some point if the relationship moves forward, and calls to rant about it, I will just be calmly supportive of my grandfather, neither confirming nor denying that I knew anything about it.

Because that's the right thing to do, right? Grandpa's love life is his business and because he chose to talk to me about it doesn't mean my Mom and all the rest of them have to know, right? And if my Mom finds out and brings it up, I'm not required to tell her I already knew about it.

Right?
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Its been over 2 yrs since mom passed away and dad swears he will never date again. Hes only 70. My sister and I have told him we give our blessing to date but he says no. Like you said "its not good to be alone" but its no ones business. I think its nice you and Grandpa can talk openly. Good for Gramps for have a companion. I wish my Pa would get one.
 
Pete

Pete

Repete
vraiblonde said:
:lmao: :shocking:

If it were 10 years from now, my Mom would STILL be freaking out about it. It's what she does.
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Maybe Grandpa needs to give your mom a time out or a spanking to put her back in her place.
 
jazz lady

jazz lady

~*~ Rara Avis ~*~
PREMO Member
BadGirl said:
Clearly, your grandfather feels comfortable talking to you about it. Obviously, he doesn't share that same closeness with your mom, otherwise, he'd be telling her himself.

Keep his news on the lowdown, and when your mom ultimately finds out - and you know she will - continue to be an ally to your grandfather. Hopefully he is finding joy and happiness in his later years.
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:yeahthat: I couldn't have said it any better. :yay:
 
Mikeinsmd

Mikeinsmd

New Member
vraiblonde said:
...right? And I'm under no obligation to mention it to my mother or her sisters, right?Here's the story:...... Right?
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You know who leaked the CIA agents name doncha..... :bubble:
 
S

Sassygirl

Guest
My situation is a little different then yours but along the same baselines. My dad who is 60 and his wife who is... well lets just say closer to my age. I did not approve at ALL!!! Up until a year ago, I finally saw the light b/c of things going on in my life. It doesn't matter what other people think. He is happy and that's what matters. We only live once, if your pappy is happy in sharing the rest of his life w/ someone else then so be it! It took me a LONG time to see this. Just b/c he has a lady friend in the pictuer does not mean he doesn't think of your grandmother probably every day.
I also agree with you on keeping that information to yourself. When the subject comes up with you and your mom, I don't think I would say "oh I already knew that".

Good luck and I hope your grandfather enjoys the rest of his days sharing them with who ever he choose!
 
Oz

Oz

You're all F'in Mad...
I went through this. I was totally supportive of my grandfather who married a younger woman about 8 months after he met her. He deserves happiness, especially at an advanced age.

But don't trust her any more than you would trust any other stranger. (Details via PM.)
 
vraiblonde

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
Oz said:
But don't trust her any more than you would trust any other stranger.
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Well, he lives in Kansas and I'm in MD, so I won't have a lot to do with her anyway. But you mark my words - the second this gets out, my Mom will be up in arms about "floozies" who are "going after" my grandfather for his "money". :lol:

Maybe we'll get lucky and he'll spill the beans at Doug's wedding so we can all enjoy it. :lol:
 
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