Wearing white to a funeral

[Eventer29]

I have no fashion sense. Lets just get that out there. I have little need to "dress up" normally, so I dont know a lot of social dress rules. I have a viewing and funeral to go to and no time to shop. Would it be appropriate to go to the funeral in a white dress? I have a greenish blue dress and a white one. I need one for one day and another for the other. I also have an acid green low cut dress with a peacock feather print that I dont think is appropriate. Thanks!

 

[FED_UP]

I have no fashion sense. Lets just get that out there. I have little need to "dress up" normally, so I dont know a lot of social dress rules. I have a viewing and funeral to go to and no time to shop. Would it be appropriate to go to the funeral in a white dress? I have a greenish blue dress and a white one. I need one for one day and another for the other. I also have an acid green low cut dress with a peacock feather print that I dont think is appropriate. Thanks!

Don't think I recall anyone wearing white to a funeral.

 

[migtig]

Many Asian cultures wear white to funerals. So I say if you are attending an Asian funeral this is appropriate.

However, if you are attending a traditional American funeral - may I suggest some nice dark slacks and an appropriate dress shirt? Even for a female, that is nice to wear when you pay your final respects. A fancy dress is not necessary. Think somber colors, greys, blacks, dark blues.

This is my opinion.

 

[ICit]

Many Asian cultures wear white to funerals. So I say if you are attending an Asian funeral this is appropriate.

However, if you are attending a traditional American funeral - may I suggest some nice dark slacks and an appropriate dress shirt? Even for a female, that is nice to wear when you pay your final respects. A fancy dress is not necessary. Think somber colors, greys, blacks, dark blues.

This is my opinion.

:hangsheadlow:... i attended one in my company uniform. boots and all.... but it was a coworkers mom.

I did tell him i was sorry... but he hugged me and told me it was ok and he was happy i was there for him.

 

[vraiblonde]

Most of those old fashion rules have been thrown out the door with pantyhose and your granny's bloomers. If the white dress is conservative and not a cutesy sundress or sexy cocktail dress, you can probably wear it.

The only rule that I think still holds is don't wear white to a wedding, unless specifically instructed to do so by the bride.

 

[Tilted]

I have no fashion sense. Lets just get that out there. I have little need to "dress up" normally, so I dont know a lot of social dress rules. I have a viewing and funeral to go to and no time to shop. Would it be appropriate to go to the funeral in a white dress? I have a greenish blue dress and a white one. I need one for one day and another for the other. I also have an acid green low cut dress with a peacock feather print that I dont think is appropriate. Thanks!

There's probably a little broader range for 'acceptable' funeral attire for women than there is for men. But I don't think it extends to a white dress, not in our (i.e. American) culture anyway.

To some people it wouldn't make a difference. For instance, I couldn't have cared less what people wore to the visitations and funerals for my loved ones. They could have worn shorts, tank tops and ball caps and I would not have been offended; I would have appreciated their presence regardless and engaged their commiseration nonetheless. But many are more easily offended and we are talking about a time when people's emotional sensibilities are heightened. Seemingly insignificant things will often serve as lightning rods of sorts for their grief and their charged and disorienting emotions.

So, while many present would likely not care or judge you poorly for wearing a white dress to a funeral, it's fairly certain that some present would think you uncouth and speak derisively about you behind your back. It's of course up to you whether and how much you care about that. But, as much as I tend not to care what others think when it comes to similarly non-substantive stuff, I'd probably bow to social expectations in this particular case and not wear a white dress (or rather advice a female friend not to wear a white dress ). Even if the other workable option was to wear the same dress to both functions, that's what I think I'd do.

 

[vraiblonde]

it's fairly certain that some present would think you uncouth and speak derisively about you behind your back.

You're correct but if they'd titter and faint over a white dress, they will surely have something to say about wearing the same dress twice in a row.

Only she can decide whether or not she wants to conform to those who would snark about someone's attire at a funeral. I'd give them the finger, but that's just me. The people who matter will most likely not notice or care. Cousin Kimmie and her low self-esteem can suck it.

 

[Tilted]

You're correct but if they'd titter and faint over a white dress, they will surely have something to say about wearing the same dress twice in a row.

Only she can decide whether or not she wants to conform to those who would snark about someone's attire at a funeral. I'd give them the finger, but that's just me. The people who matter will most likely not notice or care. Cousin Kimmie and her low self-esteem can suck it.

I agree with most of that.

 

[Roman]

I was recently at a Funeral, and there were mostly light, and Springy colors. What someone wears to a Funeral is the least concern for the Family, unless of course, they come nude.

 

[Ken King]

I was recently at a Funeral, and there were mostly light, and Springy colors. What someone wears to a Funeral is the least concern for the Family, unless of course, they come nude.

Respectful and conservative (i.e. no major cleavage, no fiery orange or prints).

 

[DEEKAYPEE8569]

Respectful and conservative (i.e. no major cleavage, no fiery orange or prints).

.....or "***k me dresses."

 

[ohstate]

Respectful and conservative is the appropriate attire. I am fairly certain this is why every woman has a little black dress in her closet. You can dress it up for evening, or make it conservative for funerals. Always appropriate (if it is conservatively cut).

 

[frequentflier]

I was recently at a Funeral, and there were mostly light, and Springy colors. What someone wears to a Funeral is the least concern for the Family, unless of course, they come nude.

Some family members of my husband's live in a clothing optional community in Texas so going without clothes would be appropriate. No one would recognize each other with clothes on!

 

[migtig]

As always dress (or not) appropriately to the audience at hand.

My dad's funeral everybody wore jeans, boots, and western style shirts, and trust me, they were dressed up. They'd wear the same to church. They removed their hats. At my mother's, very formal attire, complete with gloves.

To the OP, I still suggest a conservative outfit, not a fancy dress. :shrug:

 

[Roman]

Some family members of my husband's live in a clothing optional community in Texas so going without clothes would be appropriate. No one would recognize each other with clothes on!

Too funny FF! I was thinking about the Nudist Community when I wrote that, but didn't want to go there.

 

[nobody really]

Some family members of my husband's live in a clothing optional community in Texas so going without clothes would be appropriate. No one would recognize each other with clothes on!

dont' mean to sh*t on a serious thread, but that's funny

 

[Merlin99]

I have no fashion sense. Lets just get that out there. I have little need to "dress up" normally, so I dont know a lot of social dress rules. I have a viewing and funeral to go to and no time to shop. Would it be appropriate to go to the funeral in a white dress? I have a greenish blue dress and a white one. I need one for one day and another for the other. I also have an acid green low cut dress with a peacock feather print that I dont think is appropriate. Thanks!

The choice is between wearing white and not being there, go with the white. The family will appreciate you being there more than anything else.

 

[Roman]

the choice is between wearing white and not being there, go with the white. The family will appreciate you being there more than anything else.

:like:

 

[mamatutu]

:like:

Like, also. And, I would think it is like don't wear white until after Memorial Day, or not after Labor Day. Fashion has come a long way, baby! I don't think there are any rules, anymore. The fact that you attend a wake/funeral to show your love and respect is all that matters. The person that has passed certainly would not care what you are wearing; they would be touched that you were there for them. If you think about it, who really remembers what someone was wearing at any type of event?

 

[Done_Wrong]

Well it is my opinion that white is not appropriate for a funeral (except for noted ethnic preferences). Also the person not attending should not be the option. It’s too easy to go to a thrift store buy a nice pair of dress slacks and blouse for the respect of the deceased and their family. If you are questioning the white dress – then you know in your heart it is not the correct choice. It is also my opinion that in our current society too many exceptions are being made to the established standard of respect for others. It would have hurt me if people had attended my loved ones funeral dressed inappropriately and I think I would remember that, at least for a while. The part of attending a funeral out of respect includes appropriate dress for respect. I’m not a dress snob and would prefer a guest wear jeans over a white dress. So maybe that just “dates” me. I remember the female who wore a sexy white number to my wedding, even though her culture found it acceptable, it was not acceptable me and to the other 99 percent of people in attendance. And I did not have to talk about her behind her back, it was not worth the effort.