Failing Kindergarten in less than 2 months

[RareBreed]

Boss and his wife had a meeting with their son's teacher a few days ago. The teacher told them the son was failing Kindergarten and the parents needed to decide whether to have him repeat Kindergarten next year or take their chances with sending him to 1st grade. Is it me or does it seem really early in the school year to be making such a harsh judgement about this kid? I understand that some kids aren't ready for Kindergarten but deciding this in less than 2 months seems odd to me.

Listening to the before school chats over FaceTime each day, it's clear to me that this kid is coddled by his parents so it makes sense that he might be struggling a bit with the formality of Kindergarten and the classroom rules. But I can't understand why the school is already making the decision that he won't learn how to adjust and will be able to thrive in Kindergarten sooner than later. Seems a bit rushed to me.

If it means anything, he goes to a private Catholic school.

 

[LightRoasted]

For your consideration ...

Boss and his wife had a meeting with their son's teacher a few days ago. The teacher told them the son was failing Kindergarten and the parents needed to decide whether to have him repeat Kindergarten next year or take their chances with sending him to 1st grade. Is it me or does it seem really early in the school year to be making such a harsh judgement about this kid? I understand that some kids aren't ready for Kindergarten but deciding this in less than 2 months seems odd to me.

Listening to the before school chats over FaceTime each day, it's clear to me that this kid is coddled by his parents so it makes sense that he might be struggling a bit with the formality of Kindergarten and the classroom rules. But I can't understand why the school is already making the decision that he won't learn how to adjust and will be able to thrive in Kindergarten sooner than later. Seems a bit rushed to me.

If it means anything, he goes to a private Catholic school.

Kindergarten is a first step process into getting children acclimation ready for 1st grade. There should be no "grading" or pass or fail activities. Aren't all young children coddled, held tight and loved by most parents? Failing kindergarten? What BS.

 

[vraiblonde]

It depends on what level of maturity we're talking here. Is he potty trained? Is he able to follow basic instructions and mind the teacher? Is he able to interact reasonably with other children?

You say the kid appears to be coddled, and I will suggest that's an understatement if the teacher is already making the call.

 

[Bann]

Seems a little odd that a Catholic school teacher would characterize the child as "failing" Kindergarten at this point in time. The school year has barely started. Maybe the teacher has used other terminology and the Boss has used that term? Maybe they are being asked to cooperate in ways to help the child AT school, and the parents can't accept that, so they're blaming the teacher? Just curious.

Kindergarten is all about learning how to navigate in another world besides the cocoon of "home", about learning to get along with others, and just learning and absorbing everything new. They're literally sponges for learning! How can you fail in 2 months?

 

[RareBreed]

It depends on what level of maturity we're talking here. Is he potty trained? Is he able to follow basic instructions and mind the teacher? Is he able to interact reasonably with other children?

You say the kid appears to be coddled, and I will suggest that's an understatement if the teacher is already making the call.

He is potty trained and isn't disruptive in class. He just needs some reminders on certain things like putting things in his cubby when he gets to school. He is on the younger side of 5 as he only turned 5 in July so that might be something. He did go to daycare so he is used to being away from home, interacting with kids, and listening to an adult.

By coddled, I mean that discipline isn't consistent and the parents will threaten a punishment but never follow through. He knows it is an empty threat.

 

[Bann]

He is potty trained and isn't disruptive in class. He just needs some reminders on certain things like putting things in his cubby when he gets to school. He is on the younger side of 5 as he only turned 5 in July so that might be something. He did go to daycare so he is used to being away from home, interacting with kids, and listening to an adult.

By coddled, I mean that discipline isn't consistent and the parents will threaten a punishment but never follow through. He knows it is an empty threat.

I would be suspect of the exact terminology that parents are saying the school is using. I find it very odd.

 

[RareBreed]

Seems a little odd that a Catholic school teacher would characterize the child as "failing" Kindergarten at this point in time. The school year has barely started. Maybe the teacher has used other terminology and the Boss has used that term? Maybe they are being asked to cooperate in ways to help the child AT school, and the parents can't accept that, so they're blaming the teacher? Just curious.

Kindergarten is all about learning how to navigate in another world besides the cocoon of "home", about learning to get along with others, and just learning and absorbing everything new. They're literally sponges for learning! How can you fail in 2 months?

Failing is my word, not specifically what the teacher said. Not sure what else to call it when the teacher tells the parents to pull their kid out of school and try it again next Fall. Or if the parents kept him in class, she saw no hope for him to succeed.

 

[vraiblonde]

He is potty trained and isn't disruptive in class. He just needs some reminders on certain things like putting things in his cubby when he gets to school. He is on the younger side of 5 as he only turned 5 in July so that might be something. He did go to daycare so he is used to being away from home, interacting with kids, and listening to an adult.

By coddled, I mean that discipline isn't consistent and the parents will threaten a punishment but never follow through. He knows it is an empty threat.

Well there's a reason the teacher thinks the kid isn't ready for school, and it's not because he can't color in the lines or needs to be reminded to put his things away. He's standing out from the other 5 year olds, so it would behoove the parents to find out why and work on it. They should ask the teacher exactly why she thinks he's not going to be ready for 1st grade in a year and get specifics.

Other than that it's anyone's guess.

 

[Bann]

Failing is my word, not specifically what the teacher said. Not sure what else to call it when the teacher tells the parents to pull their kid out of school and try it again next Fall. Or if the parents kept him in class, she saw no hope for him to succeed.

As a parent, I would seek more guidance/input from the school administration and other professionals in the school. I'm not sure of the structure of private parochial schools, but there should be a meeting to discuss this situation rather than summarily taking him out because one teacher's professional opinion.

If the child is just too immature, that's one thing and possibly he might need to repeat next year. But to start the child in school and then take them out - label them that way, just seems a bit severe to me.

*I have experience with a child who had developmental delays and was in SpEd his whole school career. I was used to hearing about his deficiencies in both social/emotional and academic. There are always ways to address these issues.

 

[Bann]

Well there's a reason the teacher thinks the kid isn't ready for school, and it's not because he can't color in the lines or needs to be reminded to put his things away. He's standing out from the other 5 year olds, so it would behoove the parents to find out why and work on it. They should ask the teacher exactly why she thinks he's not going to be ready for 1st grade in a year and get specifics.

Other than that it's anyone's guess.

Right. The parents should definitly get more input.

There are lots of things that need to be addressed here, and just making the child repeat isn't going to solve them, IMO. He might need some extra help and might need that help from other professionals about other learning modalities.

 

[RareBreed]

Well, the parents have already let the school know that the son will repeat Kindergarten so it seems like a done deal. They told the son that the school determined that they will need a leader of the Kindergartners next year and have elected him as said leader. Probably not the right way to handle it but that is what they did.

 

[Clem72]

If he was on the younger side it's probably for the best. In the early school years that extra year of maturity will likely pay dividends later on. Playing catch-up for several years only to repeat a grade in middle or high school is much worse than repeating an early grade and being fully caught up with concepts early.

 

[RareBreed]

My only experience with school issues was with my youngest and having a hard time with math. His Kindergarten teacher called me in to talk about it. Found out she made him cry daily because he couldn't get the right answer right away or would use his fingers to get the right answer. Teacher told me that was unacceptable in her class. Needless to say, my response was not very lady like. I must not have been the only one with a problem with her because she was fired.

 

[black dog]

I wonder what age 5 this child is.
Is he a young five with a aug or sept birthday or an old five. 8 -10 months can make a huge deal.

 

[Ken King]

They told the son that the school determined that they will need a leader of the Kindergartners next year and have elected him as said leader.

Looks like there will be a new case of affluenza in his future.

 

[RoseRed]

My only experience with school issues was with my youngest and having a hard time with math. His Kindergarten teacher called me in to talk about it. Found out she made him cry daily because he couldn't get the right answer right away or would use his fingers to get the right answer. Teacher told me that was unacceptable in her class. Needless to say, my response was not very lady like. I must not have been the only one with a problem with her because she was fired.

I was that kid and still struggle with math. Even with two different tutors, I am completely unable to grasp certain aspects. Thank goodness common core math was introduced after my daughter was almost done with school.

 

[RareBreed]

I was that kid and still struggle with math. Even with two different tutors, I am completely unable to grasp certain aspects. Thank goodness common core math was introduced after my daughter was almost done with school.

He struggled his entire school career including now in college. Some of it is because of the new math crap but I also think that experience with his teacher left an impact that he will never be good math so why try so hard. He always passed but it was always the C on his report card of A's and B's. I sucked at math too so I can relate.

 

[RoseRed]

He struggled his entire school career including now in college. Some of it is because of the new math crap but I also think that experience with his teacher left an impact that he will never be good math so why try so hard. He always passed but it was always the C on his report card of A's and B's. I sucked at math too so I can relate.

I got kicked out of pre-algebra.

 

[Clem72]

He struggled his entire school career including now in college. Some of it is because of the new math crap but I also think that experience with his teacher left an impact that he will never be good math so why try so hard. He always passed but it was always the C on his report card of A's and B's. I sucked at math too so I can relate.

They've had 12 or 13 school years since they introduced common-core math. That's long enough so either the last set of graduates or this one will have been only exposed to the new math their entire school career.

So where are the articles and scientific papers letting us know if it was a success or not? When do we get to determine if we keep the new math or go back to old math?

 

[RareBreed]

I'm not saying the school/teacher is wrong about the kid. He probably would have benefited from holding off another year from starting Kindergarten. My issue I guess is how quick the teacher decided there was no hope for the kid to pass and how they pressured the parents into making an all or nothing decision this early.