Age of consent

[Dymphna]

But what if what *you* think is best isn't really what's best?

For example, some teen kid "loves" his girlfriend and thinks it would be best if they run away and get married so they can "be together forever". HE may think that's best, but it probably isn't.

When my son got engaged to my DIL, I thought it would be best if he didn't marry so young and ran around a bit before he settled down. Obviously I was wrong because she's a peach and they have a very successful marriage, and are insanely happy.

See what I mean?

People are wrong all the time. You thought one thing was "best" He thought something else. You also knew that in the end it was best for him to make his own decisions, even if he was the one who was wrong, because at his age he needed to learn for himself.

You had to weigh two conflicting "bests" and made a decision. It's what we do all the time, that's why such a simple sounding statement has such complicated results.

 

[Dymphna]

I was 16 when I started dating my husband. He was 20. I got married at 19.
We had sex beforehand. We were in love.

I never said no one should have sex before marriage and I'll note that you didn't mention how much beforehand... Were you in love when you had sex or did that come later?

My mother was married at 17. I know that she loves my father because she puts up with too much of his crap not to. Of course, at that time, a woman's only future was marriage and children, so it was "best" for them to go ahead and get married and establish a life together. Nowadays, a woman has more choices and can realize her dreams, so it is better for her to not be tied down. If my mother were born 20 years later, she never would have gotten married so young because she dreamed of other things, things that in the 1960's were still considered radical.

What I did say is that although 14 year olds could fall in love, if it is true love, they'll want what is best for each other and wait, because they know that waiting is best. Plenty of 14-yos THINK they are in love, and they THINK the other person is in love with them, but if they truly are in love, they will respect each other and themselves and wait. They will realize that sneaking around and potentially getting pregnant is not what is best for themselves, each other or any potential child. If they are truly in love and not blinded by lust, they will think it through, because that is what is best for those they love.

And any 14-yo who thinks having a child is a good idea has other issues.

 

[kris31280]

Common sense says that a 14 year old, no matter how in love they may believe they are, cannot effectively support a child if one is conceived. You must be at least 16 years old to work for most places in the US, so it is only logical that the age of 16 should be the age of consent.

 

[BuffaloBill]

No, you can't. It's like having an opinion on how the military should conduct a war without any experience in the military. The Generals know more than the armchair quarterbacks.

Any other dumb questions you'd like to entertain us with?

I served five years. What are you so upset about? Life didn't turn the way you wanted?

 

[Wenchy]

I served five years. What are you so upset about? Life didn't turn the way you wanted?

 

[BuffaloBill]

One less child who is better off.

Evil, how is flushing it make it better off....

 

[Wenchy]

Evil, how is flushing it make it better off....

I answered that already in your karma. Feel free to share with the class.

 

[BuffaloBill]

One less child who is better off.

How could a child who hasn't come out of the womb yet, be better off than one who has? How could something that didn't, be better off than something that does?

 

[BuffaloBill]

I answered that already in your karma. Feel free to share with the class.

Would you ever ABORT?