Beggars at Shoppers
- Thread starter Suzette
- Start date
Goldenhawk
Well-Known Member
I think this same guy tried to hit me up yesterday in St Mary's Square as I was trying to put something into my car - flying up to me on his bike, coming WAY too close for the situation, clearly an aggressive in-your-personal-space move, and started with "Hey, man, do you...". I instantly told him "I'm not giving you any money". He was clearly taken aback because he instantly changed his tune to some question about "I was just asking if you just came out of..." and rode away quickly.
GopherM
Darwin was right
There was an older lady named Rosey that frequently sat on the benches on the Leonardtown square. She approached me one day and asked me if I could spare $2 for something to eat. Instead of giving her the money I took her across the street to Ye Old Towne Cafe and told her to order breakfast. Instead of going crazy, she was very considerate with what she asked for. I told her to go ahead and get anything she wanted. She ordered a goo balanced meal. I told the young waitress to look after her, paid the bill and left a nice tip for the young lady. Rosey wasn't looking to take advantage of me, she had a good healthy breakfast and when I left, Rosey, the waitress, and I all felt better.
luvmygdaughters
Well-Known Member
That is a very nice story. Unfortunately, it seems to be the exception and not the rule these days. I may be too cynical, but if someone approaches me, asking for money, my stranger danger alert goes off immediately. I give to charities and pay taxes to help support the services that are offered to those in need. I know I sound like Scrooge, but, if you legitimately need help, that's where you have to go.
Coming late to the discussion but I see GopherM has the answer.
Offer to buy them food, offer them food. If they truly are hungry they will be thankful and accept.
NEVER give money. Let me repeat, NEVER EVER hand out cash.
If you are uncomfortable, bring the situation to the attention of store management. They can call police.
If you don't want to engage, don't. You don't owe them an explanation or an apology. Say nothing, just keep moving.
Offer to buy them food, offer them food. If they truly are hungry they will be thankful and accept.
NEVER give money. Let me repeat, NEVER EVER hand out cash.
If you are uncomfortable, bring the situation to the attention of store management. They can call police.
If you don't want to engage, don't. You don't owe them an explanation or an apology. Say nothing, just keep moving.
DannyMotorcycle
Active Member
I always like to make them earn the money with random trivia. I once had someone ask me for money at the Wawa and I said "I will give you a 20 if you can explain to me why the sky is blue... literally. Give me a scientific explanation of why the sky is blue."
I felt much better about NOT giving it to him when he walked away in defeat and pulled out his iPhone to search for the answer
LMAO.
I want to agree with berniep NEVER give them money. I'm not cold hearted. Give to people who have real emergenices, like their home burning down. Also you have to be very careful with so called charitible organziations, sometimes they only give back 5% to 15% of what they take in.
besides that, when you even feed a beggar your'e taking care of one of their needs, so that the next giving person who gives up cash allows them to go buy a drug.
You are enabling them even when you feed them. They made it this far through life without you, they'll live even if you dont' give. they'll figure it out. America has 48 million people who get food stamps. America does NOT have a starvation problem.
Let me also remind you that one of the robbery tactics is to scout out your wallet or purse... so when you dig in to get the donation, they see what you have, or just snatch your wallet all together, if not attack you first. Always say you dont' have money and "i only have a few bucks left on my credit card and i gotta buy my kids food" So that if they are at least somewhat decent they might make and excuse to not rob you. Sometimes people will simply ask you for the time or a cigarette to gauge your demeanor and if you seem soft, they'll rob you.. but if you give them a bad attitude like you might hassle their attempt at robbing you, they might move on.
SO again, please stop giving them anything, and give them the frustration "i have it bad too and i'm ready to go off" attitude.. say something like "i know man.. my money is all jacked up too.. sorry i dont' have it, i wish i did".
Let me aslo remind you their poor life choices does not constitute your emergency. they are not your children. You probably have children of your own that you need
to save money for their own emergencies...and your future or your current debts, foreseeable and unforeseeable.
Also by giving ANYTHING to them, you encourage their behavior.. so potentially one day they might be in the habbit of approaching people because people like you give to them and reward the behavior and who knows, they might push an old lady down and steal her money... We want to discourage them approaching people. Please dont' give them anything. They can go back to eat where they last ate.. and if they can't do that, they must have done a lot to pisss offf a lot of people and likely do not deserve your charity.
PLEASE STOP.
Like i said, if you want to be giving.. be giving to your friends and friends of friends or victims of tragedy in the news. You can be giving.. you can have a big heart..
but tell THESE people no. by givine to them you only prolong their current unhealthy condition and situation. DO NOT GIVE TO THEM.
And yes call the police.. to discourage their negative behavior. They are always on private property and unwanted trespassing.
This is how we keep our community better, by not enabling them, and using negative reinforcement to stop negative behavior.
3CATSAILOR
Well-Known Member
A couple of things come to mind about your post: Yes, pandering is against the law. Loitering is against the law. Stalking is against the law. Some of the beggars have real problems. Others do not. Some of a regular job, dress for the occasion and see what they can get. I have heard about some that can get over 50k in a month when begging in a well traveled area.
If someone is following you for any reason and you feel unsafe for any reason, report it to the police. It is their job to determine what he is doing and why as well as whether or not laws are broken. Many times, the police know these people. They have a history.
glhs837
Power with Control
Yeah, that guys getting all around, and that's a completely different story.
In some cities it's against the law to give money to panhandlers because it encourages them and their buddies to congregate in front of businesses, which discourages paying customers from keeping them in business.
I personally avoid places where I have to wade through beggars to enter.
Sneakers
Just sneakin' around....
Makes me sound like a jerk, but I for that for the cookie sellers in front of the stores as well.
I just tell them I have a deadly allergy to wheat and how dare they try to kill me with their fundraiser cookies!?!?!?!?!
Okay, not really. I just throw a "no thanks" over my shoulder as I breeze past them. When my son was in the Cubbies we did a cake auction fundraiser, all the parents paying enormous sums of money for baked goods just so we didn't have to stand in front of the Walmart hawking popcorn and candy bars.
Bare-ya-cuda
Well-Known Member
Had similar happen to me at sheets on great mills road last year. I saw him coming right as I started pumping gas. Once he was 8 feet or so from the rear bumper of my truck I yelled at him “Stop, If you come any closer you will die”. He stopped in his tracks and started stuttering. Could have been the drugs or the fear. I told him “slow down and what do you want?” He asked for 1 dollar. I told him I would give him a dollar but he was not to move. I had a couple bucks in my door pocket so I walked over to him and handed it to him and backed away. He kept standing there and I asked “what are you doing still here?” He said stuttering can I move now? I said yes as long as you turn and walk away from me. He did so. As I finished pumping my gas I noticed everyone at the pumps faces in shock as they were staring at me. I get a chuckle out of it every time I think about it. I always keep my head on a swivel at any gas station and never let anyone get between the pump and tour vehicle.
Grumpy
Well-Known Member
What's this mean?
kom526
They call me ... Sarcasmo
I call it situational awareness, she calls it paranoia, although that paranoia does come in handy. She hates it when I can describe people I deem as threats down to a tee.
glhs837
Power with Control
That someone giving entertainment for money and not actively shilling the crowd is fine with me. And he spreads himself around, intersections, sidewalks, etcertera. To me, this isn't really a form of panhandling.
LightRoasted
If I may ...
If I may ...
I tell them as soon as there is a nationwide grassroots effort to force the girl scouts to accept boys and they start to, and until then, to go pound sand.
The only reason for putting it in this category is the handmade sign "Wife and two kids, no job. Please give what you can". I'd actually call it busking.