Brothers kids call me by my first name.

[PeoplesElbow]

This is my aunt and I address her as Aunt Luvmygdaughters.

That is very disturbing sounding.

 

[PsyOps]

Sorry,

Currently they call me "Blue" I would prfer Uncle Blue.

Outside of this, what is their behavior towards you and others? Are they generally disrespectful? This seems more that they are just doing what they have learned, and probably have no intent of disrespect.

I am a step-dad. I never had my own kids. I will die having never been called 'dad'. For someone that has always wanted kids, I consider myself to be absolutely blessed to have raised two wonderful stepkids that, even though they always called me by my first name, I will also die knowing I was able to mold their lives and raise them to be respectful to everyone. What they call me isn't what matters. How they revere me, and others, matters. You can affect their lives regardless of what they call you.

 

[vraiblonde]

I call my aunts and uncles by their titles, except my youngest uncle who is my age-ish - I just call him by his first name. My assorted nieces and nephews by marriage call me Aunt Dee Jay.

But several of my friends' kids call me just Dee Jay, with no Miss or Ms in front of it, and that's fine with me. I know people who don't like being first-named by kids, but that's not something that's ever bothered me.

 

[BOP]

It's short sided to think the brother is being disrespectful because of how he is raising his kids.

Your statement implies that respect would be the brother doing what his sister asked, correct? You get the fallacy of that thought don't you? You don't think it's disrespectful for a sister to say she wants nothing to do with her brother's children because they call her by her name? If only "respect" was that easy.

Get over it. Be thankful for family.

Okay, they're your kids. Got it. Nothing more to say to that, except if you don't see the inherent disrespect in your (his) disregarding her requests to change your (his) children's behavior around her, then you are part of the problem.

Heard a street cop say one time "It pretty much comes down to a lack of manners. Most of the stuff going on out here [on the street] comes down to people displaying a lack of manners."

 

[Larry Gude]

Okay, they're your kids. Got it. Nothing more to say to that, except if you don't see the inherent disrespect in your (his) disregarding her requests to change your (his) children's behavior around her, then you are part of the problem.

Heard a street cop say one time "It pretty much comes down to a lack of manners. Most of the stuff going on out here [on the street] comes down to people displaying a lack of manners."

So, if people would just use some manners when sticking one another up, when smashing and grabbing, a little 'please and thank you' would go a long way or, if you B & E and no one is home, leave a nice note???

Crime is crime. You violate someone elses rights, THAT'S the problem. Uncle Blue has not yet addressed WHY he and bro have this obvious tiff so, without reflection, we're taking what we're told and assuming the rest, that the brother has no proper business not respecting his brothers wishes, wishes, not rights, to be addressed 'properly' as he sees it. Now, maybe it's that simple but, if it were, why take it out on the kids and have ill feelings towards them over a word? Why not say "Gee, my brother really annoys me because he won't have his kids address me as uncle but, hey, I like the kids so, we work it out just fine. Now, gosh, I wonder why I have this problem with brother?"

This isn't all directed at you but, more the general tone of all of this. I have a HUGE problem with one of my siblings but it doesn't impact my relationship with their kids, AT ALL. Same with other sibling whose kids were kinda bratty. I never disliked THEM over it. It was how they were being raised. If they wanted to play or hang with me, great.

There's just more going on here and good advice depends on knowing more about the situation and relationships. :shrug:

 

[Bann]

Uncle Blue has not yet addressed WHY he and bro have this obvious tiff so, without reflection, we're taking what we're told and assuming the rest

There's just more going on here and good advice depends on knowing more about the situation and relationships. :shrug: