I am NOT going to school!

Railroad

Routinely Derailed
vraiblonde said:
First of all, don't talk about whipping his ass - do it. Surprise him. When he acts up or refuses to go to school, don't threaten him with action - TAKE ACTION. You don't need a website to back you up. You are the Mommy. Take control.
YAY, Vrai!!! Ten points and some green coming your way! Amen, sistah!
 

snuzzy

New Member
When my son was acting "like a turd", I soon realized that spankings were not very effective, quickly over and then he "moved on". What did work was to take everything away from him. He had his bed with one sheet and a pillow (he's always liked a lot of pillows and blankets), a lamp and a pencil to homework by. I had seen a Malcolm in the Middle episode where Lois had the boys on their knees facing a wall with their hands behind their heads and elbows against the wall, my son had to "assume the position" while I emptied his room of all of his possessions. I then allowed him to earn back one item every day that he behaved well in school and didn't fight me on homework. The first day was great, he had a very good attitude and at the end of the day said "O.K., I did good, so I want my Poke'mon cards back". My reply?..."Oh, I forgot to tell you, I decide what you get back each day", I gave him another blanket for his bed. After a month, authority was established, he's in Middle School now and on the honor roll...
 

FromTexas

This Space for Rent
Go for the guilt. Fake a heart attack next time he refuses. Then blame him for puting you in an ambulance and going to the hospital. Next time he refuses, grab your chest and act in pain. Ask if he wants to give mommy another heart attack.

If that doesn't work, cut off one of your fingers everytime he doesn't listen. Ask him if he likes to hurt mommy like that.

These are only suggestions. Feel free to get creative.
 

Larry Gude

Strung Out
Nawty...

OK:

Then after being told he was in remission and would pull through, I realized he was milking the illness to get things done his way. I put a stop to it and that is when all he!! broke loose. It has made him a stronger (mentally) kid, but he is different from other kids. He would rather hang out with adults (teachers, my friends, kids' parents) than other kids.

You're there so, consider this merely a complete strangers observation from afar. You gotta figure it out and handle it from there.

Kids (and I suppose adults as well) that go through a really big deal like he's been through will, like everything else, handle things a bit differently from case to case. He is decidely NOT the sterotypical kid who just wants to be treated normally and get to go swing and climb the monkey bars with their peers.

You say he's stronger mentally and wants to hang with adults. I'll wager he thought his doctors and nurses were cool as hell and was interested in them as oppossed to being afraid of them.

I think you're stuck. He ain't no 6 year old up stairs and having to behave like and be around real six year olds is tourture to him. They are all there to become reasonably conforming members of society and your boy already knows there are far more important things than school. You showed him that.

Frankly, I don't see how you couldn't, so let that go. I know damn well if I was facing losing a kid at any time, behavior and rule following would be out the window to. We'd be eating ice cream for breakfast, staying up late and taking movies back two days late.

So, he's older mentally. So explain it.

"Jr, before, I thought I might lose you so, we treated every day like it might be the last. The good news is you're well now. The bad news is you are now expected to live a long and productive life which means we are no longer treating every day like it's the last. Which is actaully good news as well though you don't think so right now. So, you have to go to school and hate ever last second of it, save recess and lunch, just like all the rest of the boys and you have to act like it's OK. So, grace period is about over and if you don't get a clue we're going to have lunch with Auntie Vraiblonde and she will remove all pretext of trying to be nice about all this and and kick your ass up around your hat, so to speak. Either way, you don't get to act like your an adult until you actually become one so, glad you're feeling better, head or gut?"

That'll do it. He just needs to get with the bigger picture, just like he did with cancer.

Sounds to me like he can handle it.
 

nawty1

Poker Shark
Sorry to leave y'all hanging for so long. Had to work til 3am so after I got THEM on the bus, I went back to sleep for a few!

IT WORKED! I told him that I was the adult and he was just a little boy and laid down the law. I told him that I was tired and not going to put up with his crap. He put up a little fuss (beat his arse once) and I told him that if he didn't do "his job" by going to school and being a student I would take EVERYTHING he owned...the thought of losing his Yugioh cards to the burn barrel made his skin crawl.

Larry....you are soooo right! I am gonna sit down with him after he gets home and give him the explanation. I never thought about him being bored with other kids his age but that makes perfect sense.

The other kids at the busstop were shocked to see him getting on the bus. Knock on wood no calls from school either! Maybe it will make him feel good because they complimented him on not putting up a fight to ride the bus. I am gonna call the school and let them know that I am trying a new tactic and get some feedback on his behavior today.

Keep ya posted! :notworthy
 

Ken King

A little rusty but not crusty
PREMO Member
nawty1 said:
Sorry to leave y'all hanging for so long. Had to work til 3am so after I got THEM on the bus, I went back to sleep for a few!

IT WORKED! I told him that I was the adult and he was just a little boy and laid down the law. I told him that I was tired and not going to put up with his crap. He put up a little fuss (beat his arse once) and I told him that if he didn't do "his job" by going to school and being a student I would take EVERYTHING he owned...the thought of losing his Yugioh cards to the burn barrel made his skin crawl.

Larry....you are soooo right! I am gonna sit down with him after he gets home and give him the explanation. I never thought about him being bored with other kids his age but that makes perfect sense.

The other kids at the busstop were shocked to see him getting on the bus. Knock on wood no calls from school either! Maybe it will make him feel good because they complimented him on not putting up a fight to ride the bus. I am gonna call the school and let them know that I am trying a new tactic and get some feedback on his behavior today.

Keep ya posted! :notworthy
I wouldn't tell the school a darn thing. Just let them wonder in amazement at the turn-around.
 

K_Jo

Pea Brain
PREMO Member
appyday said:
Yep she whoooped his arse :yay:
And he got on the bus! What have we learned?

Like Chris Rock says, "You shouldn't beat some of your kids."
 
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