Is American society increasingly intolerant of tots?

[itsbob]

I know this wasn't intended for BG an I.. I just thought I'd give Morgie a hard time!!

 

[BadGirl]

No harm intended BadGirl but how can a 7 mo. old "know" what is appropriate behavior for a particular situation?
I do applaud you for having the courtesy of removing your child when he gets cranky!

You're right. My comment does sound pretty stupid. Of course, he can't "know" what is appropriate at this stage in his life. He is going to have periods of perfect behavior, just as he is going to have periods where he is an angel. Fortunately for us, he is - for the most part - a very good baby that rarely get's his diapers all wadded up and behaves badly.

When he does have those spells where he is loud, obnoxious, etc., is when he will be removed from that situation. It is this removing him from the environment that will ultimately teach him that his offending behavior will have negative consequences. At least I hope it will teach him that.

 

[Somdmommy]

This isn't directed at you, or parents like you. When your child is cranky, you remove him from the situation instead of letting him ruin everyone's evening that's around you.

This is directed at parents who allow their children to act like animals in public.

Even I took my child out to public events when she was a baby. The first outting was a movie. She was 10 days old, and I needed to get out. I fed her before we left, and she slept half way through the movie. I spent the other half of the movie in the bathroom with her because she had an upset tummy and was crying. A lot of parents today wouldn't show that courtesy.

I was at a Nascar race a few years back and the family in front of us had 3 kids with them. The youngest was no more than 2. She cried the whole time. Now her crying and yelling didnt ruin my time since I could not hear her. What made me so mad was the child was crying because her ears were hurting. They had headphones for her, but they were huge and she didnt want them on. The mother would not get up and take her away. About 100 laps to go, the mother got up and took her out. I turned around to see that she was standing about 5 rows up.

 

[morganj614]

I'm sorry that Bubba was whiney last night. I wanted to leave him in the truck while he was crying, but I figured that CPS would get on my case about it.
We take Bubba practically everywhere with us - to malls, to museums, to fast food joints, to moderately-priced restaurants, and we've also taken him to places like Asahi. It's our hope that we can expose him to all kinds of environments so that he can learn what is appropriate behavior for a particular situation. Naturally, as a seven month old, his crankiness is unpredictable, so when he is upset, we try to remove him from the establishment pronto.
I know how obnoxious some unruly children can be, and I definitely don't want Bubba to turn in to one of "those" kids.

Now, if we can get all the bars to supply high chairs

 

[BlackSheep]

You're right. My comment does sound pretty stupid. Of course, he can't "know" what is appropriate at this stage in his life. He is going to have periods of perfect behavior, just as he is going to have periods where he is an angel. Fortunately for us, he is - for the most part - a very good baby that rarely get's his diapers all wadded up and behaves badly.

When he does have those spells where he is loud, obnoxious, etc., is when he will be removed from that situation. It is this removing him from the environment that will ultimately teach him that his offending behavior will have negative consequences. At least I hope it will teach him that.

You're a good momma!
Know or learn-whatever the choice of words...it starts in the home.
I have been to ball games and concerts where folks bring their infants and very small toddlers, as well taking them with them to indoor movies. I just don't get it-don't these folks have family, friends-a hired sitter? Don't parents need time out to themselves?

 

[mAlice]

I just don't get it-don't these folks have family, friends-a hired sitter? Don't parents need time out to themselves?

I think the problem is that they don't want to leave an infant with someone else. I know I had great difficulty with this, and rarely went out. Then when they're toddlers and old enough to tell you that someone hit them or did something bad to them, they're either good children and it's easy enough to get a sitter on occasion, or that rotten and no one wants to watch them.

 

[CandyRain]

I was raised that children are to be seen and not heard.

 

[mAlice]

I was raised that children are to be seen and not heard.

Most of us were, but that's the other extreme. I think children should have a voice, it just shouldn't be a a loud, obnoxious voice.

 

[morganj614]

I was raised that children are to be seen and not heard.

buh bye then

 

[CandyRain]

buh bye then

You wish

 

[camily]

I was raised that children are to be seen and not heard.

I think that's insane. How are children to learn if they are not allowed to be inquisitive? They need to be allowed to express themselves and be....God forbid...children. Sure, my kids know the rules of when and where and I discipline them but I for one love talking to my kids and quite frankly, they crack me up!

 

[CandyRain]

I think that's insane. How are children to learn if they are not allowed to be inquisitive? They need to be allowed to express themselves and be....God forbid...children. Sure, my kids know the rules of when and where and I discipline them but I for one love talking to my kids and quite frankly, they crack me up!

I don't think the old adage means that you should put duct tape on their mouths and never let them speak There's a time and a place for everything.

 

[pixiegirl]

I'm going to start a Baby and Tot Boot Camp. When Vrai rules the world she and select designees can pluck ill behaved children up at will and send them to Boot Camp at my place.

If children are taught well at home then they know how to behave and what is expected of them in public. They know just what they can and can not get away with.

 

[jazz lady]

You're right. My comment does sound pretty stupid. Of course, he can't "know" what is appropriate at this stage in his life. He is going to have periods of perfect behavior, just as he is going to have periods where he is an angel. Fortunately for us, he is - for the most part - a very good baby that rarely get's his diapers all wadded up and behaves badly.

Even at his worse, he's better behaved than most children I've seen lately. He was just tired and wanted to go to sleep. Heck, I did too.

When he does have those spells where he is loud, obnoxious, etc., is when he will be removed from that situation. It is this removing him from the environment that will ultimately teach him that his offending behavior will have negative consequences. At least I hope it will teach him that.

And I'm sure he will learn that lesson quickly. I sure did when I was a kid. If me or my siblings misbehaved in public, we were quickly ushered away - ALL of us. Peer pressure works wonders.

I've gone to restaurants where I've been hit with flung french fries and stores where kids have run full tilt into me while screaming at the top of their lungs while mommy and/or daddy acts oblivious to it all.

 

[pixiegirl]

I don't think the old adage means that you should put duct tape on their mouths and never let them speak There's a time and a place for everything.

I agree actually. If I'm out with the fam having dinner at a decent place the children are expected to sit down, talk at a reasonable tone; they can play at the table, I remember my father and I playing table football all the time; they are expected to maintain composure. If they don't behave they can expect to be punished.

If we're at the park they have free rein to run and hollar and carry on at will so long as they're not rude to other people.

 

[morganj614]

Even at his worse, he's better behaved than most children I've seen lately. He was just tired and wanted to go to sleep. Heck, I did too.
I've gone to restaurants where I've been hit with flung french fries and stores where kids have run full tilt into me while screaming at the top of their lungs while mommy and/or daddy acts oblivious to it all.

Me too, but usually from an adult

 

[Toxick]

I haven't read the entire thread yet, so I don't know if this has been brought up, but the parents of unruly brats can't really do much in public.


Perhaps everyone in these here forums may cheer and offer kudos to a parent that solidly cracks the ass of a child who's acting like a feral turd. But you have to remember that 9 times out of 10... no... more like 99 times out of 100, there will be some smarmy busybody who will have Child Services track you down and tell you that you're beating your child, and if they find out that it continues, they will take the child away.


This is not to say that the parents are blameless - my children know that I won't slap the ever-loving piss out of them in a restaraunt, but they also know that if they act the fool, there will be hell to pay when they get home. If there were more discipline at home, there would be less hell-raising in public. So I'm not excusing the parent - But that there are many children who don't think that far in advance. So when they start acting out, and the parents cannot drop the hammer, they'll push the envelope, and you have a bunch of kids around the restaraunt.





On the other hand, that should be the time you take your kids out to the car for a 'talk'.

 

[jazz lady]

Me too, but usually from an adult

Gotcha.

 

[mAlice]

I haven't read the entire thread yet, so I don't know if this has been brought up, but the parents of unruly brats can't really do much in public.


Perhaps everyone in these here forums may cheer and offer kudos to a parent that solidly cracks the ass of a child who's acting like a feral turd. But you have to remember that 9 times out of 10... no... more like 99 times out of 100, there will be some smarmy busybody who will have Child Services track you down and tell you that you're beating your child, and if they find out that it continues, they will take the child away.


This is not to say that the parents are blameless - my children know that I won't slap the ever-loving piss out of them in a restaraunt, but they also know that if they act the fool, there will be hell to pay when they get home. If there were more discipline at home, there would be less hell-raising in public. So I'm not excusing the parent - But that there are many children who don't think that far in advance. So when they start acting out, and the parents cannot drop the hammer, they'll push the envelope, and you have a bunch of kids around the restaraunt.





On the other hand, that should be the time you take your kids out to the car for a 'talk'.

You don't have to smack the brat. Simply remove it from the environment.

 

[baileydog]

I was raised that children are to be seen and not heard.

Also....Do as I say not as I do. Because believe it or not and I do believe this, there are things that adults can do that kids cant, ie...drink, swear, smoke. Good or bad, its true.