Is it mine? Or should I give it back?

[Qurious]

Lets say you were engaged to be married, and received a family heirloom (about 80 years old) as the engagement ring. Your fiance' dies before you get married. His family wants the heirloom back and is willing to give you a replacement ring.

Should I give it back? Or do I keep it?
What would be the legal answer to this as well since the contract was with him, NOT his family.

 

[theArtistFormerlyKnownAs]

Out of not being a biatch, you give it back to the family.
Legally, you can probably keep it :shrug: I'm not positive though.

 

[AnnieC]

Lets say you were engaged to be married, and received a family heirloom (about 80 years old) as the engagement ring. Your fiance' dies before you get married. His family wants the heirloom back and is willing to give you a replacement ring.

Should I give it back? Or do I keep it?
What would be the legal answer to this as well since the contract was with him, NOT his family.

Do the right thing and return the ring, take the replacement if you are that greedy.
Dude is dead and so is the so called "legal contract" is dead also.

PS: Sorry for your loss......

 

[Christy]

Give it back.

 

[lovinmaryland]

Hmm that is actually a hard one... first instinct would be to give it back, but then again that was something special that he would have given to you and wanted you to have. I am not sure what I would do.

 

[mAlice]

Knowing the importance of a "family" heirloom, I'd give it back. If you had gotten married and had a child, it would have eventually gone to another one of his family members. Since that didn't happen, the right thing to do would be to return, so that it will remain in the family.

Even if I married, then divorced at some point, I'd return a family heirloom if I didn't have a child associated with his family to will it to.

 

[toppick08]

back

 

[Cowgirl]

Give it back! It's a family heirloom and you're not (technically) part of the family.

 

[sockgirl77]

Legally, you were never married therefore you must give the ring back. Even if you were not bound to by law, if you had one shred of decency, you wouldn't even have to ask what the laws were.

 

[lovinmaryland]

Give it back! It's a family heirloom and you're not (technically) part of the family.

But she would have been. He/and the family obviously cared enough about her to give her the ring/heirloom. I just wonder how it came about.

If it were me personally once I got under control from losing my fiance (which could be months-years) I would have probably given it back to the family w/ no asking necessary... the thing that throws me as that they actually asked her for it back and offered a replacement ring.

 

[Otter]

Hmm that is actually a hard one...

Nothing hard about it, you give it back.

 

[vbailey]

Knowing the importance of a "family" heirloom, I'd give it back. If you had gotten married and had a child, it would have eventually gone to another one of his family members. Since that didn't happen, the right thing to do would be to return, so that it will remain in the family.

Even if I married, then divorced at some point, I'd return a family heirloom if I didn't have a child associated with his family to will it to.

I would return the ring...most likely you have other gifts from this man that you can keep to cherish his memory... not knowing your age, you most likely will meet another man one day and have the chance to be married....in that case the ring would most likely end up put away some place and maybe even forgotten in years to come....My heart would be broken, but I would give it back to his family....

 

[donbarzini]

A good case can be made for the following:

It was a family heirloom, and it was given under the supposition that the recipient was expected to become a member of that specific family. Since that is no longer the case the item should be returned.

 

[vbailey]

I agree with mAlice...

 

[Qurious]

Guess I'm alone on this one.

I would keep the ring until I was ready to give it back....i deserve to have whats left of my would be husband...im greiving. what sick coldhearted family does this? they were ready to accept me into their home as a daughter in law but now its like "whatever - give us back our property."
And.......this is totally disrespectful to my would be dead husband. He's probably rolling over in his grave, he would want me to have whats left of our love.

 

[Ken King]

I would say as she didn't break off the engagement she would not be legally required to give the ring back. Given that it was a family heirloom there should have been a pre-nuptual agreement to cover the return of the ring. Having said that I would suggest that the trade for a replacement ring offered by the family seems appropriate.

 

[Novus Collectus]

The only two reasons I can think of for not giving it back are if the family are the greedy ones and only plan on selling the thing for big profit as soon as they get it back, or if the fiancee would not have wanted it to be given back.
If neither of the two situations above apply, then it is a given.....give it back.

 

[sockgirl77]

Guess I'm alone on this one.

I would keep the ring until I was ready to give it back....i deserve to have whats left of my would be husband...im greiving. what sick coldhearted family does this? they were ready to accept me into their home as a daughter in law but now its like "whatever - give us back our property."
And.......this is totally disrespectful to my would be dead husband. He's probably rolling over in his grave, he would want me to have whats left of our love.

And that's what makes you who you are.

 

[BS Gal]

I'd give it back since it was an heirloom.

 

[Novus Collectus]

Guess I'm alone on this one.

I would keep the ring until I was ready to give it back....i deserve to have whats left of my would be husband...im greiving. what sick coldhearted family does this? they were ready to accept me into their home as a daughter in law but now its like "whatever - give us back our property."

It is a family heirloom, give them some slack....they are grieving too.

And.......this is totally disrespectful to my would be dead husband. He's probably rolling over in his grave, he would want me to have whats left of our love.

If you do not know for sure that is how he would have felt, then you should give them the benefit of the doubt and respect the wishes of what is really left of your fiancee....his family.