Male Daycare Provider

[Busterduck]

Absolutely! If they are a kind, caring, knowledgeable person, I don't care what sex they are. Men can be just as good caregivers as women. My SIL's hubby is a stay at home Dad. I sure wished they lived near me. I would love to have him as a babysitter.

 

[snuzzy]

I was a director of a commercial childcare center and we hired @ 4 guys who were awesome with the kids. We only had one situation where a mother had a fit about one of the guys being in the toddler room because he was changing diapers, girls and boys, it really weirded her out. To avoid any issues he was moved, which was unfortunate because those little kids adored him. In a commercial setting you always have other adults around, so it is different from what you are asking, but I wanted to share my experience!

 

[ocean733]

Personally, I would have no problem with a male daycare provider. Assuming that this man has a child abuse clearance, some men have a natural knack with children and love to be around them.

 

[WishyWashy]

Perhaps the wife had a higher paying job (or some other mitigating factor) than the husband and they decided that it'd be better for him to stay home with the kids than for the wife to do it? I'd LOVE to be able to stay home with my kids while the wife went to work in an office somewhere.

Maybe he's a single dad and this is his way of being able to spend time with his kids?
Maybe his "regular" job didn't pay enough for him to afford to put the kids in childcare while he worked?

Actually that is our situation, while we both have good jobs I do make more money. We are now expecting our second child and have been discussing him staying home with the new baby like he did with our daughter until she was 2. However we can not afford for him not to work completely... so we've been discussing the options of him getting a part time job and then I recommended him starting the daycare.

He said he'd love to do it but didn't think many parents would be open to the idea and honestly I don't know how I'd feel about it myself if it weren't my husband. So I told him I'd start asking around.

I mean the man is just wonderful with kids. He has the patience of a saint with our daughter, nieces, nephews, friends kids. And they all love to be around him and think he's funny and so on.

 

[Elle]

Actually that is our situation, while we both have good jobs I do make more money. We are now expecting our second child and have been discussing him staying home with the new baby like he did with our daughter until she was 2. However we can not afford for him not to work completely... so we've been discussing the options of him getting a part time job and then I recommended him starting the daycare.

He said he'd love to do it but didn't think many parents would be open to the idea and honestly I don't know how I'd feel about it myself if it weren't my husband. So I told him I'd start asking around.

There are male teachers and male doctors that I entrust my child to, why would a male daycare provider be any different?

 

[Cowgirl]

There are male teachers and male doctors that I entrust my child to, why would a male daycare provider be any different?

And weirded out about a man changing diapers? Puh-lease....that's like saying you wouldn't want a father to change his daughter's diaper. And as far as sexual crimes, I'd think ANY licensed daycare has a background check. Also, it's not just men that can be molesters.

I would take my children to any daycare provider that I liked, regardless of sex.

 

[huntr1]

And weirded out about a man changing diapers? Puh-lease....that's like saying you wouldn't want a father to change his daughter's diaper. And as far as sexual crimes, I'd think ANY licensed daycare has a background check. Also, it's not just men that can be molesters.

I would take my children to any daycare provider that I liked, regardless of sex.

Any person doing childcare (licensed that is) has to have a background check. Both state and Federal if I remember correctly.

 

[MMDad]

They way the press plays up molestation cases so dramatically has affected the way I look at this. I know that men are just as capable as caregivers, but there is still something that gives me the willies at the thought of trusting a man to watch my daughter.

I was even concerned when my daughter's second grade teacher turned out to be male. Then I met him and realized that my my daughter was safe since she's not a boy.

It's not fair to the male teachers or caregivers that I distrust them, but my protective nature as a parent sometimes overides the logic.

 

[aanderson]

My daycare lady's husband is her sub when she is out. I met him when I interviewed her and he actually works with my husband...so we trust him just as much as we trust her. I think that many men are totally wonderful with children and it is a shame that society has this view of men and children and how unnatural it is.

 

[bohman]

It's not fair to the male techers or caregivers that I distrust them, but my protective nature as a parent sometimes overides the logic.

I understand that. Even with what I posted above, I'd have to get to know a man a little longer before I'd trust him as a caregiver. I guess I just get mad when people aren't even willing to believe that any man should be left unattended near children. Like we can write off the idea of any guy taking care of kids.

 

[Toxick]

I'm not sure how I'd feel about it.. i guess it would depend on how the interview went. If they guy seemed ok, I'd think about.

I liked Daddy Day-Care and in the movie it seemed cool... but in reality, my first reaction would be: Why is this guy running day-care? Can't he get a job? Basically, I would just simply conform to the generalized societial based bias: As a rule men are not very nuturing, supportive, cuddly people like chicks are.

Now all the guys I know - at least the ones who have kids - like to play with kids, and do magic tricks, sing songs, and make faces to make all the kids laugh, as well as throw the ball around and take everyone out for pizza. The guys I know who don't have kids, don't like 'em at all or they are uncomfortable around kids (at least they don't play like the dads do). But I can't think of a single man that I know who would volunteer to be around kids and nothing but kids all day every day.

The very concept makes my eyelid twitch.


Therefore, sexist as it may be, if I came across a man who does volunteer to do this kind of work I can't help but think: what's wrong with this guy?

 

[bohman]

But I can't think of a single man that I know who would volunteer to be around kids and nothing but kids all day every day.

The very concept makes my eyelid twitch.

Got that right. I'll go so far as to say that men are capable of caring for children, but you'll never catch me volunteering to put up with somebody else's brats all day, every day. :shootmenow:

 

[hotmomma]

FOUND THIS ARTICLE

[Is it safe to hire a male caregiver?

That depends on the male baby-sitter. The vast majority of sexual abuse is committed by males. Statistically, your child is at much greater danger from male baby-sitters than from female baby-sitters. Call us chauvinistic, but the facts - sadly - are the facts. Personally, we always felt the risk was not worth the reward. Nevertheless, we accept that there are many males who are great with children and who would be excellent caregivers. Our advice is to take the same steps with a potential caregiver who is male, as you would take with a potential caregiver who is female. Do a background check, interview the candidate, listen carefully to what you're told and pay close attention to the candidate's body language, avoid making excuses for any shortcomings, call the references and pay close attention to what they say and how they say it, absolutely trust your instincts, pay attention to your child's reactions, watch for changes, and follow through on doubts or concerns.]


I know I heard on Dateline or some other show that men are more likely to sexually abuse children but it also said women are more likely to physically abuse your kids. Hard to trust anyone with our precious kids. I guess we are taught that it is the "norm" for women to have daycares. I would love if myself or my husband were able to stay home with our children but thats not possible so they do go to daycare. I'm lucky I have found a wonderful provider. She treats my daughters like they are her own.

 

[WishyWashy]

Thank you all for your feed back!!

Note to self: NEVER let husband read this thread! For the simple I told you so factor.

 

[Qurious]

Okay so the vast majority of sexual abuse is committed by males just as the vast majority of child abuse is committed by females.

Take your pick.

My male friend works at a popular daycare center in Waldorf and the kids absolutely love him. They need a male figure around.

I wouldn't have a problem sending my child to a male provider who worked in a center....but in a home???

unless he was a relative....NEVER. and as double standards apply here, they also apply in other areas...oh well.

 

[nightowl]

They way the press plays up molestation cases so dramatically has affected the way I look at this. I know that men are just as capable as caregivers, but there is still something that gives me the willies at the thought of trusting a man to watch my daughter.

I was even concerned when my daughter's second grade teacher turned out to be male. Then I met him and realized that my my daughter was safe since she's not a boy.

It's not fair to the male teachers or caregivers that I distrust them, but my protective nature as a parent sometimes overides the logic.

I have to say I feel the same way you do.

I also see that I have different standards concerning my daughter than my son. I know part of it is he's 10 and she's only 5 but I also know that I sent him to camp at age 6 and I don't plan on sending my daughter. I don't know what the statistics are for boys but I've always heard that 1 in 4 girls/women will be sexually assaulted in their lives and that just scares the heck out of me. Regardless of if it's prejudice or not I can't help how I feel.

 

[keekee]

I would never ever in a million years use a male daycare provider.

Now if the husband/father is staying home with the kids, that's a different situation...

 

[basher]

Daddy Daycare was a great movie

 

[huntr1]

Daddy Daycare was a great movie

That was our "Anniversary Movie" the year it came out.

 

[Dymphna]

There are a few male daycare providers around. Most of them started out as their wife's assistant and became her partner in the business. I knew of one when we lived in Frederick who was a provider on his own because he was a stay-at-home dad. He was very popular as a provider for boys who needed a father figure or for very active boys. He had few girls in his care, as I understand it.

If your husband wants to do this, tell him to go for it. He will find a lot of prejudice, but those clients he does get will appreciate having a different dynamic and will recommend him to their friends. Just don't count on living off of his income from the start, like any business, it can take a while to build up a client base. If he does get licensed, he should get involved in the local day care association in your county. He will stand out in the crowd and when other providers have to make referrals because they are full, in the wrong school district for someone, or whatever reason, they will remember him.