Mommy Guilt

[pelers]

The mommy guilt is strong this morning. Usually my toddler doesn't see me leave to work, daddy gets up a bit later and he gets the kids ready and takes them to daycare. Toddler was up and perky this morning and was following me around as I got things ready to go. When it came time for me to leave he ran over to the door and started saying "Outside!"

I tried to explain that no, mommy has to go to work and that daddy will take him to school. I had to close the front door in my toddler's sobbing face

He's probably totally fine by now, but I still feel like a huge jerk.

 

[KDENISE977]

The mommy guilt is strong this morning. Usually my toddler doesn't see me leave to work, daddy gets up a bit later and he gets the kids ready and takes them to daycare. Toddler was up and perky this morning and was following me around as I got things ready to go. When it came time for me to leave he ran over to the door and started saying "Outside!"

I tried to explain that no, mommy has to go to work and that daddy will take him to school. I had to close the front door in my toddler's sobbing face

He's probably totally fine by now, but I still feel like a huge jerk.

Ahhh yes, the mommy guilt. I've got it too. Last night we had to give spankins for him throwing kicking tantrums and it made him cry those big crocodile tears, but I refuse to have a child be a discipline problem.

I also have had to leave daycare when he's crying. The teachers are so good with him, they try and distract him and ask if he wants to go for a walk to the kitchen or to the other classrooms. I've actually only had to leave one time while he was crying and I walked outside and peeked in the window and he was fine. Already forgot me But it is HARD to do and my husband calls me every morning on the way to work to see how he did when I dropped him off, usually he's just fine, this morning included a kiss and a "wuv you"... was a good morning

 

[withrespect]

Ahhh yes, the mommy guilt. I've got it too. Last night we had to give spankins for him throwing kicking tantrums and it made him cry those big crocodile tears, but I refuse to have a child be a discipline problem.

I also have had to leave daycare when he's crying. The teachers are so good with him, they try and distract him and ask if he wants to go for a walk to the kitchen or to the other classrooms. I've actually only had to leave one time while he was crying and I walked outside and peeked in the window and he was fine. Already forgot me But it is HARD to do and my husband calls me every morning on the way to work to see how he did when I dropped him off, usually he's just fine, this morning included a kiss and a "wuv you"... was a good morning

This is my life. verbatim. Down to the having to give spankins last night because of tantrums.


You are not alone... ♪

 

[Kris10]

Awwww I hate that feeling

 

[KDENISE977]

This is my life. verbatim. Down to the having to give spankins last night because of tantrums.


You are not alone... ♪

Ah thank god. Having only one child, you analyze everything and think you're doing it all wrong.

 

[pelers]

Ahhh yes, the mommy guilt. I've got it too. Last night we had to give spankins for him throwing kicking tantrums and it made him cry those big crocodile tears, but I refuse to have a child be a discipline problem.

I hate those tantrums. Yesterday he did not want to come in out of the rain when we got home. He ALMOST had a sidewalk tantrum, but thought better of it when he realized the ground was wet and dirty.

this morning included a kiss and a "wuv you"... was a good morning

Awwww, that's so sweet.

 

[KDENISE977]

I hate those tantrums. Yesterday he did not want to come in out of the rain when we got home. He ALMOST had a sidewalk tantrum, but thought better of it when he realized the ground was wet and dirty.



Awwww, that's so sweet.

We had the tantrum, the sidewalk one... which lead to the spanking. He has his routine of daddy coming out of the house and getting him out of the car and walking around outside or at least walking into the house but with the rain...MAN O MAN he went ballistic. I'm glad I don't have close neighbors because it was not pretty.

 

[withrespect]

I hate those tantrums. Yesterday he did not want to come in out of the rain when we got home. He ALMOST had a sidewalk tantrum, but thought better of it when he realized the ground was wet and dirty.



Awwww, that's so sweet.

Bubba has started doing that every day when we get home... the past couple days it has been too nasty out...

Bubba: Murmy asside?

WR: No, Bubs... too yucky out...

Bubba: Asside!! Murmy asside!!!

WR: Mommy said no.

Bubba: ASSIDE!!! Bubba ASSIDE!!!! (that's right, he hit me)


husband didnt like that at all. So bubba got a whoopin.

He needed it though.

 

[ZARA]

Ahhh yes, the mommy guilt. I've got it too. Last night we had to give spankins for him throwing kicking tantrums and it made him cry those big crocodile tears, but I refuse to have a child be a discipline problem.

One day (MANY MANY years ago) I was discussing this very situation with a friend of mine. She is a foster mom and has 12 children. Four are hers and 8 are adopted. The 8 that she adopted are all related.

I cannot bring myself to hit my child and she is the same way. I told her I did not know how to handle the crazy tantrums and I was at a loss for what to do. She smiled at me and said, "Mimic him." I asked her, "You want me to mimic him? Like, throw myself on the floor and fuss the way he does?" She grins at me and says, "Exactly."

I figured I had nothing to lose, so I tried it. My son was so confused by MY actions that he stopped and just stared at me. *Shrugs* Just an Idea.

 

[pelers]

Bubba: ASSIDE!!! Bubba ASSIDE!!!! (that's right, he hit me)


husband didnt like that at all. So bubba got a whoopin.

He needed it though.

Yeah, I hate to do it, but I think we're going to have to start the whoopins as well. This hitting, kicking and shrieking shiat is NOT making me a happy mama. Have tried smacking his hands/feet when he hits/kicks, have tried time outs, have tried ignoring, have tried reasoning killingme), have tried yelling. Nada.

 

[pelers]

I cannot bring myself to hit my child and she is the same way. I told her I did not know how to handle the crazy tantrums and I was at a loss for what to do. She smiled at me and said, "Mimic him." I asked her, "You want me to mimic him? Like, throw myself on the floor and fuss the way he does?" She grins at me and says, "Exactly."

I figured I had nothing to lose, so I tried it. My son was so confused by MY actions that he stopped and just stared at me. *Shrugs* Just an Idea.

I actually did do this once (in public!) and yeah, it worked beautifully. I got the best WTF look from him and he did knock it off.

 

[withrespect]

Yeah, I hate to do it, but I think we're going to have to start the whoopins as well. This hitting, kicking and shrieking shiat is NOT making me a happy mama. Have tried smacking his hands/feet when he hits/kicks, have tried time outs, have tried ignoring, have tried reasoning killingme), have tried yelling. Nada.

We do the corner mostly...then smack hands... Lately the only thing that gets his attention is a spanking... (He still has a diaper on so I am not sure it is even doing anything - but it shocks the hell out of him.)

 

[KDENISE977]

One day (MANY MANY years ago) I was discussing this very situation with a friend of mine. She is a foster mom and has 12 children. Four are hers and 8 are adopted. The 8 that she adopted are all related.

I cannot bring myself to hit my child and she is the same way. I told her I did not know how to handle the crazy tantrums and I was at a loss for what to do. She smiled at me and said, "Mimic him." I asked her, "You want me to mimic him? Like, throw myself on the floor and fuss the way he does?" She grins at me and says, "Exactly."

I figured I had nothing to lose, so I tried it. My son was so confused by MY actions that he stopped and just stared at me. *Shrugs* Just an Idea.

This is a good idea, and I'll try it. I did actually call my mother to ask and her answer was like "huh", "tantrums with hittiing and kicking?" You see, I'm the youngest of 5 and my mother said there was no way she'd have ever tollerated that and it was never a question asked to her because none of her kids ever threw fits, #showoff.

Secondly, I also was discussing with my husband, how through violence ie spankings, do you try and teach them NOT to hit or shove (he shoved a girl at daycare, knocked another one down and took a toy), to which my husband went :shrug: yeah, thanks for the help buddy !

Right now, spankings are the only thing that actually makes him STOP what he's doing, gets his attention.

 

[withrespect]

This is a good idea, and I'll try it. I did actually call my mother to ask and her answer was like "huh", "tantrums with hittiing and kicking?" You see, I'm the youngest of 5 and my mother said there was no way she'd have ever tollerated that and it was never a question asked to her because none of her kids ever threw fits, #showoff.

Secondly, I also was discussing with my husband, how through violence ie spankings, do you try and teach them NOT to hit or shove (he shoved a girl at daycare, knocked another one down and took a toy), to which my husband went :shrug: yeah, thanks for the help buddy !

Right now, spankings are the only thing that actually makes him STOP what he's doing, gets his attention.

All of us are going to be sent to Social Services...

 

[KDENISE977]

Yeah, I hate to do it, but I think we're going to have to start the whoopins as well. This hitting, kicking and shrieking shiat is NOT making me a happy mama. Have tried smacking his hands/feet when he hits/kicks, have tried time outs, have tried ignoring, have tried reasoning killingme), have tried yelling. Nada.

I've even resorted to books on this(yes, reading about tantrums) and EXACTLY what they say is to try and "redirect their attention" to something else..well, I dont' know what the hell their kids are doing but mine is bat SHIAT crazy when he wants something and can't have it.

 

[lante]

Deaing with Kids Tantrums

Can i recommend a web site for the parents who struggle with kids who tantrum, it is called parenting by connection. It is a great website and has some great techniques in dealing with kids who are having a tantrum... I have gone through the training and try to incorporate the techniques with my 2 kids and it has been great.

 

[KDENISE977]

I also think a lot of it is a learned behavior. I know my son has seen a little boy at daycare throw tremendous fits.

 

[withrespect]

I also think a lot of it is a learned behavior. I know my son has seen a little boy at daycare throw tremendous fits.

I think my son is just destined to be an overreactor.

 

[KDENISE977]

I think my son is just destined to be an overreactor.

hard to imagine

 

[withrespect]

hard to imagine

"No, WR... he will be normal and just fine."