As a productive member of society goes about his business, his activity alerts 2 pukestains who are lazing around in their section 8 lair. The worker is taking the stains' shiny object. And of course the more physical of the 2 objects to being denied his object. He jumps into action which causes bodily harm to the human. The female of the species intervenes. She is easily identified by the colorful plumage she exhibits when she is in heat.
But it isn't to ascertain the degree of injury to the human. She assists the other feral in securing the shiny object. Once the trinket is well hidden, they return to their filthy den to partake of some dried floral intoxicants and multiple inexpensive malt beverages. Animal control will need to come out to tranquilize the larger of the 2 intellectually challenged bipeds. Since the pukestain isn't capable to simple comprehension, it will not understand the commands it is given. This will either lead to a night stick smackdown, an entertaining does of Edison medicine or it may require a small dose of hot lead in order to achieve compliance.