Question about parenting

[stylin]

There is a lot to this story but I will give everything in a nutshell so it will not bore some of you. My stepson (who I pretty much raised) is gay, well he is 22 and wants to live at my house with his partner. I have a 7 year old and do not feel this is something I want her around nor do I want it in my home. Right now they are staying there and moving out this weekend because we will not allow them to sleep in the same room and feel this is very unfair...partner is 26. I look at it this way, my home, my rules plus you guys are grown men, get out and do it on your own. They are going to live my my mother in law and she will allow them to cohabitate in the same room and told me and my husband I should let them sleep in the same room and that my 7 year old should be told what their relationship is. I don't, again my rules - oh well, she and I kindof had it out and she called me a homophobe. I told her to call it what she wants.

My question is, would you let them sleep in the same room? Most people tell me I am doing the right thing...just wondering.

 

[aps45819]

My stepson (who I pretty much raised) is gay, well he is 22 and wants to live at my house with his partner.
My question is, would you let them sleep in the same room? Most people tell me I am doing the right thing...just wondering.

I'd let them sleep in any room they want since my 22 year old son and his 26 year old buddy can get their own damn place.
Gay or straight they're old enough to support themselves. I think your MIL will regret her enlightened, progressive attitude after they mooch off her for a few months


FYI - don't expect grandchildren

 

[Beth_kennedy]

There is a lot to this story but I will give everything in a nutshell so it will not bore some of you. My stepson (who I pretty much raised) is gay, well he is 22 and wants to live at my house with his partner. I have a 7 year old and do not feel this is something I want her around nor do I want it in my home. Right now they are staying there and moving out this weekend because we will not allow them to sleep in the same room and feel this is very unfair...partner is 26. I look at it this way, my home, my rules plus you guys are grown men, get out and do it on your own. They are going to live my my mother in law and she will allow them to cohabitate in the same room and told me and my husband I should let them sleep in the same room and that my 7 year old should be told what their relationship is. I don't, again my rules - oh well, she and I kindof had it out and she called me a homophobe. I told her to call it what she wants.

My question is, would you let them sleep in the same room? Most people tell me I am doing the right thing...just wondering.

Tough question. I am not against gay couples at all and my kids have been exposed to gay couples much of their life, but I think I would have second thoughts about a young couple living in my house...gay or not...at that age they should be own their own....

Your child, your house, your call.

 

[vraiblonde]

Gay or straight they're old enough to support themselves. I think your MIL will regret her enlightened, progressive attitude after they mooch off her for a few months

Took the words right out of my...well, fingers, anyway.

I wouldn't let my son and his *girl*friend live in my house. He can come back, but his partner can go live with their own parents.

 

[itsbob]

Gay or Straight

you must break the dinner plate.

 

[DanceMom]

If you want to co-habitat then get your own place. Come for dinner, bring your friend, visit and hang out but at the end of the evening - go home. Regardless of sexual preference, keep the pda at home.

 

[bohman]

Gay or straight they're old enough to support themselves. I think your MIL will regret her enlightened, progressive attitude after they mooch off her for a few months


FYI - don't expect grandchildren

Gay or Straight

you must break the dinner plate.

If this were in my family, it'd have nothing to do with orientation, and everything to do with your rules about co-habitating before marriage.

And they are plenty old enough to get their own place. Why anybody (gay or straight) wants to live with their parents as adults is beyond me. Grow up already.

 

[mv_princess]

Question,

If he wasn't gay, would you let him and his girl live at your house under those rules?

 

[morningbell]

Question,

If he wasn't gay, would you let him and his girl live at your house under those rules?

Or just get them bunkbeds

Why would they want to live in your place. If was a gay man I'd want to have my own place so I can throw the most fabulous dinner soirees

 

[DoWhat]

Question,

If he wasn't gay, would you let him and his girl live at your house under those rules?

Wouldn't you get tired of hearing the "oooouch, oooouch, ooouch, ooouch, oouch, oouch, ooooooooooooh", everytime you walked by the bedroom door?

 

[mv_princess]

Wouldn't you get tired of hearing the "oooouch, oooouch, ooouch, ooouch, oouch, oouch, ooooooooooooh", everytime you walked by the bedroom door?

I am not saying what she did was right or wrong. They are her rules if you want to live there tough it out.

But I am wondering if she would have had the same rules (*different rooms*) if it was her son and his girlfriend.

 

[Sharon]

I wouldn't let my son and his *girl*friend live in my house.

If they want to play house they need to get their own place.

 

[sn315on]

22 is old enough to be out on his own, especially if his partner is 26. I personally think that I wouldn't want to deal with questions about their relationship from a 7 year old. Maybe when your child is older, things can be brought up, but, I think that they should tell her with you in the room. My experience with friends that are gay, it doesn't last long once they are on their own and paying their own bills.

We've imposed rules for sleeping arrangements with our 23 year old daughter and her boyfriend of four years. We didn't let them sleep in the same room until last Christmas. It was hubby that was the hold out, it's his little girl, y'know?

Your MIL will regret it.

 

[Mojo]

Wouldn't you get tired of hearing the "oooouch, oooouch, ooouch, ooouch, oouch, oouch, ooooooooooooh", everytime you walked by the bedroom door?

I think I could deal with that, I would just get annoyed with hearing AARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH and then giggling everytime they find buried treasure.

 

[bcp]

I think I could deal with that, I would just get annoyed with hearing AARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH and then giggling everytime they find buried treasure.

I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

 

[amotley]

my daughter is 20 and lives in richmond va she is a lesbain and i really get along with her girlfriend the same as i do with my other daughters boyfriend, i have allowed from time to time for my older children to have their bf or gf stay overnight. they sleep on a pull out couch or a blow up mattress. i have asked the 3 older children to respect me and no long kisses and such in front of the younger children. my younger ones have had a little bit of adjusting to my gay daughter. but i guess everyone reacts different, i mean you do have a very young one my youngest was 13. i cant say what i would have done with a 7 year old being involved but them again love is love and if explained to the young one the child probably wouldnt even think anything about it. jho

 

[morningbell]

my daughter is 20 and lives in richmond va she is a lesbain and i really get along with her girlfriend the same as i do with my other daughters boyfriend, i have allowed from time to time for my older children to have their bf or gf stay overnight. they sleep on a pull out couch or a blow up mattress. i have asked the 3 older children to respect me and no long kisses and such in front of the younger children. my younger ones have had a little bit of adjusting to my gay daughter. but i guess everyone reacts different, i mean you do have a very young one my youngest was 13. i cant say what i would have done with a 7 year old being involved but them again love is love and if explained to the young one the child probably wouldnt even think anything about it. jho

IDK, you just love your children no matter what.

 

[bresamil]

They're old enough to have gainful employment and pay rent on their own place.

 

[Beth_kennedy]

22 is old enough to be out on his own, especially if his partner is 26. I personally think that I wouldn't want to deal with questions about their relationship from a 7 year old. Maybe when your child is older, things can be brought up, but, I think that they should tell her with you in the room. My experience with friends that are gay, it doesn't last long once they are on their own and paying their own bills.

We've imposed rules for sleeping arrangements with our 23 year old daughter and her boyfriend of four years. We didn't let them sleep in the same room until last Christmas. It was hubby that was the hold out, it's his little girl, y'know?

Your MIL will regret it.

So you mean they stop being gay once they are out on on their own and paying bills?











Just yanking your chain....

 

[sn315on]

So you mean they stop being gay once they are out on on their own and paying bills?











Just yanking your chain....

Haha! I've seen it happen to 3 couples over the past 10 or so years. They all start out at home, then when they move out, they are suddenly grownups.