Shut up!

[pixiegirl]

Do you think it's appropriate to tell your kids to shut up? Personally I don't do it with Noah. He's only 3 and I certainly don't want him running around repeating it. But I have seen several other people that do tell their kids to shut up and don't discourage or punish them for saying it to their peers. I can understand telling a teenager to shut up but anything younger then that I don't find appropriate. Am I alone on this one?

 

[cattitude]

I never told my kids to Shut Up...of course now I wish I had.

 

[kwillia]

I agree it is rude and leads by poor example. I also agree the older my son gets, the more I find myself heading down that verbal road...

 

[aps45819]

Do you think it's appropriate to tell your kids to shut up? Personally I don't do it with Noah. He's only 3 and I certainly don't want him running around repeating it. But I have seen several other people that do tell their kids to shut up and don't discourage or punish them for saying it to their peers. I can understand telling a teenager to shut up but anything younger then that I don't find appropriate. Am I alone on this one?

I think it's rude to tell anybody to Shut Up.

Of course sometimes I want to be rude.

 

[pixiegirl]

I think it's rude to tell anybody to Shut Up.

Of course sometimes I want to be rude.

I don't think it's the kindest thing to say but I don't have a problem saying it to an adult or a snotty teenager. I've noticed a lot of my friends use it with their younger kids and think that it's horrid especially when these kids are running around telling each other to shut up.

 

[cattitude]

You should have combined both of your "do you" threads today and just asked if it's okay to tell people to STFU.

 

[pixiegirl]

You should have combined both of your "do you" threads today and just asked if it's okay to tell people to STFU.

It's very obvious when I have a light work load isn't it.

 

[fddog]

Even if you never tell your child to shut up, One of his classmates will say it to them.

 

[cattitude]

Even if you never tell your child to shut up, One of his classmates will say it to them.

Sometimes they even get paid to shut up.

 

[fddog]

Sometimes they even get paid to shut up.

My son is 7 and he comes home weekly with a new word.

 

[pixiegirl]

My son is 7 and he comes home weekly with a new word.

And if you were smart you'd take him into the bathroom and make him eat soap for repeating them.

 

[fddog]

And if you were smart you'd take him into the bathroom and make him eat soap for repeating them.

Actually, i sit down and talk to him about words he has used, and if the word is bad enough, he not only has a red hinney. But he also sits in his bedroom, with no tv, no gameboy. Nothing but a pencil and a pad of paper and has to write me a letter to explain what he has done wrong.

 

[Otter]

Even if you never tell your child to shut up, One of his teachers will say it to them.

 

[fddog]

 

[pixiegirl]

Actually, i sit down and talk to him about words he has used, and if the word is bad enough, he not only has a red hinney. But he also sits in his bedroom, with no tv, no gameboy. Nothing but a pencil and a pad of paper and has to write me a letter to explain what he has done wrong.

Soap is more effective. Ask my mom. I got my arse beat many times and got grounded even more. I ate soap once.

 

[cattitude]

And if you were smart you'd take him into the bathroom and make him eat soap for repeating them.

:ralphie:

 

[fddog]

Soap is more effective. Ask my mom. I got my arse beat many times and got grounded even more. I ate soap once.

blew bubbles for a week did ya

 

[Tina2001aniT]

I agree Pix, I do not like shut up either.....just think it sounds mean, when I get really frustrated it slips out to the kiddo, but other than that no way, and she knows she better not let me hear her say it. I have always liked for her to say "be quiet please" and honestly she does a good job at saying that rather than shut up, and it's funny cause there are times where you can tell she is VERY frusterated and she is like be quiet please knowing she really wants to say STFU!!!


Another one that really gets me is kids calling each other "dummy" or "stupid"

 

[Railroad]

I agree Pix, I do not like shut up either.....just think it sounds mean, when I get really frustrated it slips out to the kiddo, but other than that no way, and she knows she better not let me hear her say it. I have always liked for her to say "be quiet please" and honestly she does a good job at saying that rather than shut up, and it's funny cause there are times where you can tell she is VERY frusterated and she is like be quiet please knowing she really wants to say STFU!!!


Another one that really gets me is kids calling each other "dummy" or "stupid"

Yup, you're one of the folks who subscribe to the school of thought that teaches you should treat young kids like adults. They aren't adul;ts, but you are. You have to assume that responsibility and assert your authority. And thelling the youngster to shut up and take many forms, but "be quiet please" is the kind of garbage that drives the rest of us crazy, when a kid is acting up in public. "Shut up or I'm going to whup your behind" tends to work a bit better - especially if you DO whup their behinds when they don't shut up. Raising a kid is not an exercise in popularity. It's an exercise in tough love, the kind of education that sticks and helps mould them into adults.

Growing up, stripped to the basics, is a process of learning by experience. A child learns that a stupid act brings a feedback of "that was stupid" or "you are stupid." Good way for the kid to figure out that doing that stupid thing again would result in feeling stupid. Feedback from peers or parents, it depends on the individual kid and parents which weighs more, but it always weighs something. Negative feedback for bad stuff, positive feedback for good stuff. Very simple. A technique being rapidly abandoned by the wreckage of the Dr. Spock era.

 

[Nickel]

"that was stupid" or "you are stupid."

In my opinion, the phrase "shut up" is ignorant, I try not to say it to anyone, and never say it to my child. Same goes for "stupid". Continuously call your kid stupid and see how they mature into a well rounded adult. Allow your child to call other children stupid, and see how many friends they have. I'm the oldest child in my family, and my real brother and I were raised, for the most part, in the south. The level of manners from me, to my real brother(19), to my youngest brother (10, born and raised in somd) is clearly evident. I say "please" and "thank you", "excuse me", etc. My youngest brother is, at times, disrespectful, telling even my mother to "shut up" or calling things "stupid". When my son hears him, he yells "DON'T SAY THAT WORD". I'd rather my son expand his vocabulary and learn polite yet effective ways to convey his feelings than resort to soft-core cursing. :shrug: