Toddler sleep patterns

[KDENISE977]

My monitor stopped working ages ago. Before the little girl was born and I never bothered to replace it. Go ahead and turn it off. If you're not comfortable with it off then it's obviously not time yet

You're right :huggy I'm not ready It's not hurting. Anything right ??

 

[Roman]

You're right :huggy I'm not ready It's not hurting. Anything right ??

Nope!

 

[somdfunguy]

You're right :huggy I'm not ready It's not hurting. Anything right ??

Exactly

 

[KDENISE977]

Bringing this thread back because now we have a super awesome 3 year old who sleeps soundly through the night in his twin bed (not a toddler bed) and he's 3 now. However, I've been reading lately that children 2-5 should get 11-12 hours of sleep a night? and this makes me how is that possible? My son is up at 5:45 at school by 6:00 a.m. and I pick him up at around 4:30, for that amount of sleep to happen he would need to be asleep basically right after dinner.

My son is in bed at 8:30 and he has a choice of watching something educational, or reading a book till 9:15 then it's sleep time. Is this a horrible routine? are we bad parents because he's getting only 8 hours of sleep??

 

[Bann]

Bringing this thread back because now we have a super awesome 3 year old who sleeps soundly through the night in his twin bed (not a toddler bed) and he's 3 now. However, I've been reading lately that children 2-5 should get 11-12 hours of sleep a night? and this makes me how is that possible? My son is up at 5:45 at school by 6:00 a.m. and I pick him up at around 4:30, for that amount of sleep to happen he would need to be asleep basically right after dinner.

My son is in bed at 8:30 and he has a choice of watching something educational, or reading a book till 9:15 then it's sleep time. Is this a horrible routine? are we bad parents because he's getting only 8 hours of sleep??

Does he get a nap at school?

I only have my kids as a frame of reference. I was a SAHM. Thing 1 got up at the crack o' dawn. (5-5:30am) He took a good afternoon nap 1-2hrs) ans was in bed about 7-7:30. Thing2 got up a bit later usually. He took a naps, also and was in bed by 7-7:30 as well.

I can understand that it is much harder to keep this kind of routine with parents' work schedules, though.

 

[mamatutu]

Bringing this thread back because now we have a super awesome 3 year old who sleeps soundly through the night in his twin bed (not a toddler bed) and he's 3 now. However, I've been reading lately that children 2-5 should get 11-12 hours of sleep a night? and this makes me how is that possible? My son is up at 5:45 at school by 6:00 a.m. and I pick him up at around 4:30, for that amount of sleep to happen he would need to be asleep basically right after dinner.

My son is in bed at 8:30 and he has a choice of watching something educational, or reading a book till 9:15 then it's sleep time. Is this a horrible routine? are we bad parents because he's getting only 8 hours of sleep??

I think every child is different. If your son is thriving, active, not cranky, and having fun, then I think what you are doing is great. I think the wind down time with a book or ed tv is a great idea. That is 45 mins of quality time, and I don't think him sleeping through that is better. JMO. I miss when my children were young. Take in every moment while you can, and enjoy! You will look back, and it will be gone in a blink of an eye.

 

[KDENISE977]

Does he get a nap at school?

I only have my kids as a frame of reference. I was a SAHM. Thing 1 got up at the crack o' dawn. (5-5:30am) He took a good afternoon nap 1-2hrs) ans was in bed about 7-7:30. Thing2 got up a bit later usually. He took a naps, also and was in bed by 7-7:30 as well.

I can understand that it is much harder to keep this kind of routine with parents' work schedules, though.

Yes, they take a nap at 1-3 at school, but these 2 articles I read said like 12 hours AT NIGHT... how is that possible for any kid?? I'd never get to spend ANY time with him !!

 

[KDENISE977]

I think every child is different. If your son is thriving, active, not cranky, and having fun, then I think what you are doing is great. I think the wind down time with a book or ed tv is a great idea. That is 45 mins of quality time, and I don't think him sleeping through that is better. JMO. I miss when my children were young. Take in every moment while you can, and enjoy! You will look back, and it will be gone in a blink of an eye.

That's my next issue we're having, should we NOT be letting him fall asleep with us (and by us I mean either me or my husband) putting him to bed and staying with him till he falls asleep? at what age does that need to stop? We usually take turns who puts him to bed and read or watch TV till 9:15 then tell him it's time to sleep and turn lights off or TV off and that's it. My husband is on the big push to make him go to bed at his normal 8:30 and leave him in his room to fall asleep on his own... we still have the monitor in his room so we can see what he's doing and if he would get out of bed.

 

[mamatutu]

That's my next issue we're having, should we NOT be letting him fall asleep with us (and by us I mean either me or my husband) putting him to bed and staying with him till he falls asleep? at what age does that need to stop? We usually take turns who puts him to bed and read or watch TV till 9:15 then tell him it's time to sleep and turn lights off or TV off and that's it. My husband is on the big push to make him go to bed at his normal 8:30 and leave him in his room to fall asleep on his own... we still have the monitor in his room so we can see what he's doing and if he would get out of bed.

Oh. I thought he was in his own big boy bed with the book (you reading or him) and that the tv was in his room. Your question is a tough one about the falling asleep with you guys. I think he is still young enough to fall asleep with you, but time will come soon when he will have to be weaned from that; so I guess, the sooner the better. But, I am partial now to the cuddling and being together part because as I mentioned, it goes by so fast! Before you know it, he will be wanting to be independent from you! From what you have posted over time about your little man, I think he will do just fine how ever you handle it. Good luck!

 

[KDENISE977]

Oh. I thought he was in his own big boy bed with the book (you reading or him) and that the tv was in his room. Your question is a tough one about the falling asleep with you guys. I think he is still young enough to fall asleep with you, but time will come soon when he will have to be weaned from that; so I guess, the sooner the better. But, I am partial now to the cuddling and being together part because as I mentioned, it goes by so fast! Before you know it, he will be wanting to be independent from you! From what you have posted over time about your little man, I think he will do just fine how ever you handle it. Good luck!

Okay I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, he IS in his own bed, not ours...his bed is a twin bed, and despite the controversy, he has his own TV. His bed is a large twin race car bed which fits either my husband or myself to read or watch his TV with him. We don't allow him into our bed unless it's a weekend morning or something like that when we're all watching cartoons .

 

[mamatutu]

Okay I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, he IS in his own bed, not ours...his bed is a twin bed, and despite the controversy, he has his own TV. His bed is a large twin race car bed which fits either my husband or myself to read or watch his TV with him. We don't allow him into our bed unless it's a weekend morning or something like that when we're all watching cartoons .

Oh, again! One of you are staying with him in his bed until he falls asleep. Don't mind me. I am old and slow! Well, my opinion on that is a child can never have enough closeness and feeling of security from his/her parents. I suppose you could reduce the staying time by a minute or so every few days overtime, and he probably won't notice, and find it normal at the end. Now, if you post and ask this question when he is a teenager, I might have different advice. Just kidding! You sound like awesome parents. Isn't this forum wonderful to have for feedback! I didn't have that option when I was muddling through child rearing. And, no, there is no book ever written yet on the exact art/rules of parenting.

 

[KDENISE977]

Well, night one of trying to get kiddo to go to sleep on his own was a bust... daddy fell asleep in his bed with him, once again

 

[mamatutu]

Well, night one of trying to get kiddo to go to sleep on his own was a bust... daddy fell asleep in his bed with him, once again

Keep at it! I always think of the Nanny shows and how they show you how to do it. There is nothing to those shows. You do it as you deem best. It seems like a struggle, but trust me, these will be the endearing years that you remember and want back. I hope I am here when your boy and future children reach adolescence and teen age. You will be asking for more advice than you are now! I am just teasing you and making light of it, but, seriously, enjoy the young years of your children, and don't get exasperated!

 

[Bann]

Yes, they take a nap at 1-3 at school, but these 2 articles I read said like 12 hours AT NIGHT... how is that possible for any kid?? I'd never get to spend ANY time with him !!

That's my next issue we're having, should we NOT be letting him fall asleep with us (and by us I mean either me or my husband) putting him to bed and staying with him till he falls asleep? at what age does that need to stop? We usually take turns who puts him to bed and read or watch TV till 9:15 then tell him it's time to sleep and turn lights off or TV off and that's it. My husband is on the big push to make him go to bed at his normal 8:30 and leave him in his room to fall asleep on his own... we still have the monitor in his room so we can see what he's doing and if he would get out of bed.

I am only speaking from own experience, but I am a big fan of children being independent sleepers. What I did was - after dinner, they spent time with dad while I cleaned up. (Or vice versa, but he was Navy and home less time with them, so he usually took that time) First, it was bath time, then, they would watch 1 or 2 shows: typically, it was Wheel of Fortune & Jeopardy. Then, he would read to them from various kids' books from Bible stories to picture books, etc. They really loved the bible stories! Usually, the reading stories took place in their bedroom with the kid in their bed. Then, it was time for sleeping and we would leave them to do that.

There was a routine and natural transition every night. We spent a lot of time with them - counting dinner time through bedtime. I was the stay at home parent, so I usually spent LESS time with them during this time - BUT! I kept the same routine when their dad was on deployments. Their dad didn't get home until about 4pm most of the time he was not deployed (which was A LOT over the 15 yrs we were married). We usually did not go out of the house in the evenings - mostly because of Thing1 as his "good" behavior would decline rapidly (more than normal for kids his age, etc) the later it got after dinner. NO one would benefit when that happened. Seriously, though - he couldn't handle a lot of extra curricular activities at that time of day, so I adapted to fit what worked for us.

I don't know how you can get more hours of sleep for him (if he needs it) unless you change the whole bedtime transition time to be less, so he actually goes to sleep a bit earlier. He is not a long sleeper and is functioning fine (not cranky & tired acting) then I wouldn't really worry. Some kids don't sleep a lot.

 

[pelers]

We're actually in the same boat (once again). For the last few months he won't go to sleep without one of us in there "nuggling" (snuggling). On the one hand, it's really sweet and I love it and I know it won't last forever. On the other hand I could really use that time to get things straightened around the house. Hubs and I usually switch off on the nuggles. It almost always ends up with one of us passing out in boy's bed.

Lately he's been waking up in the wee hours and coming in to sleep with us in our bed. Again, it's one of those things I should probably put a halt to, but he's 3 and he won't want to snuggle forever. I hope. He actually managed to kick hubs out of the bed last night! I woke up at 3 to this loud THUMP and I sat bolt upright yelling my son's name, thinking it was him that fell. I look around and no, son is in my bed, taking his half out of the middle... but there's my husband, sitting up on the floor with this totally confused look on his face.

 

[KDENISE977]

We're actually in the same boat (once again). For the last few months he won't go to sleep without one of us in there "nuggling" (snuggling). On the one hand, it's really sweet and I love it and I know it won't last forever. On the other hand I could really use that time to get things straightened around the house. Hubs and I usually switch off on the nuggles. It almost always ends up with one of us passing out in boy's bed.

Lately he's been waking up in the wee hours and coming in to sleep with us in our bed. Again, it's one of those things I should probably put a halt to, but he's 3 and he won't want to snuggle forever. I hope. He actually managed to kick hubs out of the bed last night! I woke up at 3 to this loud THUMP and I sat bolt upright yelling my son's name, thinking it was him that fell. I look around and no, son is in my bed, taking his half out of the middle... but there's my husband, sitting up on the floor with this totally confused look on his face.

Luckily, my son doesn't get into our bed. But if one of us isn't in his bed and he wakes up he'll ask for "mommy" and we can of course hear it in the monitor. We still have bells on his door handles and a "somewhat" childproof lock on his door only because we're afraid he'll sneak out and don't want him falling down the hardwood stairs. I guess we'll try it again tonight and see what happens... I think the same way you do, he'll only WANT us in there for SO long, but again, I know he can't be a 5 year old needing mommy or daddy to put him to sleep

 

[SoMDGirl42]

I do believe some kids do not require as much sleep as others for what ever reason. My 8 year old wasn't a good sleeper as a baby, but she wasn't fussy, she just didn't want to sleep all night. At 8, there are still many nights she doesn't sleep all night and will read or watch TV for a while in the middle of the night. It's just her. Now that she's older, she can tell me when she's tired and when she's not. She doesn't have a set bedtime, but typically between 8:45 and 9:00 she'll tell me she's tired and ready to go to bed. When she goes to bed to sleep, she's out within minutes. I've nver seen anyone fall alseep so quickly. But most mornings she's up by 5-5:30. She now tells me when she does sleep through the night, or what time she was awake during the night.

Best of luck with the little one.

 

[pebbles]

my son is 6 & a half. I lay down with him most nights at bedtime. We talk a little & he curls up & goes to sleep. I sometimes fall asleep & when I wake up I go to bed or I just get up after he's asleep. I know it won't last forever & I don't see an issue. He feels safe, it's "our time" to talk about anything that is on his mind. To each their own. Good luck with what you decide to do. But let it be YOUR decision not what society says you should do.

 

[BadGirl]

my son is 6 & a half. I lay down with him most nights at bedtime. We talk a little & he curls up & goes to sleep. I sometimes fall asleep & when I wake up I go to bed or I just get up after he's asleep. I know it won't last forever & I don't see an issue. He feels safe, it's "our time" to talk about anything that is on his mind. To each their own. Good luck with what you decide to do. But let it be YOUR decision not what society says you should do.

I do the same thing, and my son is 8 years old.

I tuck him in, lay down next to him, have him read me a story, or tell me about his day and his plans for tomorrow, and we just tell jokes and talk about how much we love each other.

I would do this until he turns 27 if it weren't so yucky. But until he tells me "enough", I will do this. It is my uninterrupted time to snuggle with him, and I absolutely love doing it.

 

[KDENISE977]

I agree with all of this, my husbands theory is that it's actually keeping him up LATER having us in there as a distraction I guess. The few times my husband has left when he was still awake, my son just sort of rolls over and goes to sleep. Mind you, that's only been 2 total times. When I'm putting him to bed and lay down, he wants to sing songs and lay all over me...when husband puts him to bed he sort of curls up under his arm and they just chat about anything (my husband LOVES this time), but again, it keeps him up later.