what direction what you take??
- Thread starter ynnhoj
- Start date
She doesn't have the same family values as you do. Sounds like someone I used to know. Self centered. Liquidwrench
New Member
Coming from a single dad here, do yourself a favor and let her go be miss independent. No woman is coming between me and my little buddies. If she can't accept the fact that you have a child and responsibilities then she isn't the one.
Go get one with kids of her own. She'll understand just fine.
Go get one with kids of her own. She'll understand just fine.
citysherry
I Need a Beer
What I find the most disturbing about your posts so far, is the lack of the use of word and/or expression of “love.” Are you in love with this woman? Also, how can you be living with someone for 2 years and not know where they stand on family values? This is where you went wrong in my opinion. You don't try to “blend a family” without knowing up front where everyone stands, what their expectations are and their willingness to accept the responsibility of a ready made family. You need to have one hell of a serious conversation with this woman now!
I couldn't agree more with everyone else.
You two have been together for 2 years and she is still going to throw in your face that she isn't used to kids ? 2 years is plenty of tiem to get used to a child, especially living with them.
It's okay for her to be on a different ''page'' than you are, but you are the one with the child here and every decision you make, not only affects your life, but your child's as well.
I can understand her wanting to do some things alone with you, and that's fine, but when the ''party'' is over, it's over. You can't always expect someone to watch your child every time she wants to do something ''alone'' with you and maybe that is something you could point out to her. He is YOUR responsibility and no one else's and even though she may understand that, in a way I don't think she understands it completely.
I think she is being selfish and you can't be that way when you live with someone especially when there is a child involved.
You will find someone who is on the same ''page'' as you and someone who wants to be a part of your life as well as your child's life.
I would honestly, try and break things off with her.
Things may be hard for a while, but it seems like the best solution.
The house and credit card, can be let go. But you have to decide is it right to ler her go ?
Keep us posted.
All the best to you
You two have been together for 2 years and she is still going to throw in your face that she isn't used to kids ? 2 years is plenty of tiem to get used to a child, especially living with them.
It's okay for her to be on a different ''page'' than you are, but you are the one with the child here and every decision you make, not only affects your life, but your child's as well.
I can understand her wanting to do some things alone with you, and that's fine, but when the ''party'' is over, it's over. You can't always expect someone to watch your child every time she wants to do something ''alone'' with you and maybe that is something you could point out to her. He is YOUR responsibility and no one else's and even though she may understand that, in a way I don't think she understands it completely.
I think she is being selfish and you can't be that way when you live with someone especially when there is a child involved.
You will find someone who is on the same ''page'' as you and someone who wants to be a part of your life as well as your child's life.
I would honestly, try and break things off with her.
Things may be hard for a while, but it seems like the best solution.
The house and credit card, can be let go. But you have to decide is it right to ler her go ?
Keep us posted.
All the best to you
I think you need to wake up to the fact that you are being used. Of course she like the way things are going...you're doing everything and she comes and goes as she pleases with no responsibilities (except what she contributes financially).
After you dump her take a deep look into yourself. Why did you let this go on for so long? You sound a little needy - something you need to work on in order to find a good partner that will respect you and share your family values.
Oh and your son may just act like he likes her because he knows you do. Kids are savvy like that.
After you dump her take a deep look into yourself. Why did you let this go on for so long? You sound a little needy - something you need to work on in order to find a good partner that will respect you and share your family values.
Oh and your son may just act like he likes her because he knows you do. Kids are savvy like that.
mainman
Set Trippin
You and Mary are headed in different directions pal...
Think of your little pal, he is all that matters, focus your energy on him...
Drop the zero dude, the right one will love and nurture the boy as her own.
IMO, if she does not accept him then on many levels she does not accept you either.... My son is an extension of me, as I know yours is of you. He comes along with this package..
Kick her to the curb...
Think of your little pal, he is all that matters, focus your energy on him...
Drop the zero dude, the right one will love and nurture the boy as her own.
IMO, if she does not accept him then on many levels she does not accept you either.... My son is an extension of me, as I know yours is of you. He comes along with this package..
Kick her to the curb...
citysherry
I Need a Beer
There it is right there - nothing else needs to be said!
i had taken offense to a few of the responses. i read all of them a second and third time. but your all RIGHT. i do have me to blame also!
looking back, maybe i was hoping to 'make' things work more than i realized they would. i always knew she was a carefree, laid back women. she loves, and is good to her family. she avoids confrontation in other parts of her life just to stay happy. she is very attractive, has a professional job, and makes good money. we get along great, laugh, we both like to chatter, both drug and alcohol free, we are both active athletically. and i do love her...getting upset with each post i make thinking of leaving her. the only part she is missing to complete this relationship, which happens to be the most important in my life, is my son and family involvment. and this isnt something that i can teach her. i thought it would just get better with time.
i wanted there to be everything in the first women i met since my sons mother. thats why i had taken nearly 3 yrs off without dating. i thought i had found her. we were friends before we started dating. i do need to wake up, make the realization that she is NOT the women for me, and make the appropriate steps to move on. this is not something that i can do overnight. but its also not going to be a year in the making. we'll need to transition out of the relationship as smoothly as possible. i dont want the change to be hard on my lil guy either. he has made alot of friends in the neighborhood. and its really his first group of friends since we have been here since he was 3 yrs old. i'd like to stay in the area, close to good schools, his mother, and my brother and his family. affordable house picking is slim.
i would like to keep mary as a friend she makes a very good one. she just isnt the perfect partner for me.
you guys are right. i do know what i have to do.
thanks
looking back, maybe i was hoping to 'make' things work more than i realized they would. i always knew she was a carefree, laid back women. she loves, and is good to her family. she avoids confrontation in other parts of her life just to stay happy. she is very attractive, has a professional job, and makes good money. we get along great, laugh, we both like to chatter, both drug and alcohol free, we are both active athletically. and i do love her...getting upset with each post i make thinking of leaving her. the only part she is missing to complete this relationship, which happens to be the most important in my life, is my son and family involvment. and this isnt something that i can teach her. i thought it would just get better with time.
i wanted there to be everything in the first women i met since my sons mother. thats why i had taken nearly 3 yrs off without dating. i thought i had found her. we were friends before we started dating. i do need to wake up, make the realization that she is NOT the women for me, and make the appropriate steps to move on. this is not something that i can do overnight. but its also not going to be a year in the making. we'll need to transition out of the relationship as smoothly as possible. i dont want the change to be hard on my lil guy either. he has made alot of friends in the neighborhood. and its really his first group of friends since we have been here since he was 3 yrs old. i'd like to stay in the area, close to good schools, his mother, and my brother and his family. affordable house picking is slim.
i would like to keep mary as a friend she makes a very good one. she just isnt the perfect partner for me.
you guys are right. i do know what i have to do.
thanks
Nickel
curiouser and curiouser
Good for you, admitting it is the hardest part. As much as you love this woman, I'm sure you love your son a million times more. Women come and go, and somewhere out there is a woman who will love your son like her own, and will want to be a part of your family. Your son deserves that, he doesn't deserve someone who sees him as someone else's kid.Originally posted by ynnhoj
i had taken offense to a few of the responses. i read all of them a second and third time. but your all RIGHT. i do have me to blame also!
looking back, maybe i was hoping to 'make' things work more than i realized they would. i always knew she was a carefree, laid back women. she loves, and is good to her family. she avoids confrontation in other parts of her life just to stay happy. she is very attractive, has a professional job, and makes good money. we get along great, laugh, we both like to chatter, both drug and alcohol free, we are both active athletically. and i do love her...getting upset with each post i make thinking of leaving her. the only part she is missing to complete this relationship, which happens to be the most important in my life, is my son and family involvment. and this isnt something that i can teach her. i thought it would just get better with time.
i wanted there to be everything in the first women i met since my sons mother. thats why i had taken nearly 3 yrs off without dating. i thought i had found her. we were friends before we started dating. i do need to wake up, make the realization that she is NOT the women for me, and make the appropriate steps to move on. this is not something that i can do overnight. but its also not going to be a year in the making. we'll need to transition out of the relationship as smoothly as possible. i dont want the change to be hard on my lil guy either. he has made alot of friends in the neighborhood. and its really his first group of friends since we have been here since he was 3 yrs old. i'd like to stay in the area, close to good schools, his mother, and my brother and his family. affordable house picking is slim.
i would like to keep mary as a friend she makes a very good one. she just isnt the perfect partner for me.
you guys are right. i do know what i have to do.
thanks
Why should you have to move out? Is it her house, or both of yours? If anything, you should stay, she is an adult, and it would be easier for her to move than it would be for a child.
