What would you do?

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greeneyes36

New Member
Have a friend... keeps telling me stories about current boyfriend... supposed to be in a "committed relationship" with each other... spends the weekend at his place... phone rings 0215a.m. - missed the call but then txt msg follows -- wake ur ass up..trying to hook up with you unless you're with sum1 else... -- they look at the phone and see another msg from earlier in the night - says i guess u kicked me to the curb again huh? he never checked the msg or responded to the earlier one. He tells her its some chick he ran into at bike week (girlfriend couldnt go with him) - numbers got exchanged, says he's not interested... she's txt him few times since then - he just short txt's her back - one word answers... says he did NOT spend time alone with her - just hanging out w/ crowd in clubs..she was friends wth couple of friends of his.... promises he's telling truth..would never do that to her... says -- okay ?? deleted all the contact info and the messages right there in front of her at 2am.....told her that if he gets anymore msgs from her, he will rightly tell her NOT INTERESTED and show her the msgs if he gets anymore from her. NOW... when girlfriend comes crying to me - i dont know what to tell her...??... any thoughts? he's otherwise been honest, caring and very loving... totally into her and wants to spend his nights with her.
 
pixiegirl

pixiegirl

Cleopatra Jones
I was about to ask how old the people involved were but then it occured to me that my ex husband use to go through my phone. You should tell your friend that she shouldn't be snooping in his phone and if he's accepting of such behavior than he needs his head checked too.
 
sockgirl77

sockgirl77

Well-Known Member
It's obvious that "she" doesn't trust him. Otherwise, she would not be snooping through his phone. If she doesn't trust him, she shouldn't be with him.


P.S. The dude is lying. Why would he exchange numbers with some chick if he's in a commited relationship?
 
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kris31280

Guest
Invasion of privacy is grounds for serious relationship reconsideration...

If the dude's cheating on her, she has every right to know... but snooping through his phone and acting like a psycho female isn't quite the way to go about that line of questioning.
 
vraiblonde

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
sockgirl77 said:
Why would he exchange numbers with some chick if he's in a commited relationship?
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I'm in a committed relationship, and I have several guys' phone numbers on my cell.

It's obvious that "she" doesn't trust him. Otherwise, she would not be snooping through his phone. If she doesn't trust him, she shouldn't be with him.
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She sounds incapable of trust, so my take is that anyone she hooks up with will have to deal with her raging insecurity.
 
Mojo

Mojo

New Member
sockgirl77 said:
It's obvious that "she" doesn't trust him. Otherwise, she would not be snooping through his phone. If she doesn't trust him, she shouldn't be with him.


P.S. The dude is lying. Why would he exchange numbers with some chick if he's in a commited relationship?
Click to expand...


:roflmao:
 
sockgirl77

sockgirl77

Well-Known Member
vraiblonde said:
I'm in a committed relationship, and I have several guys' phone numbers on my cell.
Click to expand...

Yes, women have male friends and vice versa. But, do you go somewhere without the hubby, meet a stranger, and exchange numbers? I guess it could happen. But, the text messages make it seem like it was more than that.
 
nachomama

nachomama

All Up In Your Grill
sockgirl77 said:
Yes, women have male friends and vice versa. But, do you go somewhere without the hubby, meet a stranger, and exchange numbers? I guess it could happen. But, the text messages make it seem like it was more than that.
Click to expand...

To a point, I agree with you. Texting has become such the norm these days, that it can be very innocent in nature. I have a lot of married guys that text me throughout the course of the day, and I text them, but that in no way means that I want to get with them. :shrug:

Texting at 2:00 a.m., however, could be something different. And if she thinks there's an infidelity problem surfacing, and he's insisting there is not, then she needs to decide if she wants to deal with this behavior or bail. Acting in a psychotic manner is a sure fire way of getting him to bounce though.
 
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greeneyes36

New Member
makes sense to me... as far as the snooping through his phone = they apparently just got in from being out and it starting buzzing on his nightstand - he checked it with her right there to see... didnt seem dishonest if he checked it for her to see too?? anyways... thanks for the input - wanted to see what others thought before i really offered up any advice. i've been cheated on and didnt want to automatically go with what my past would lead me to believe... he's totally into her so that's what makes it odd.. my ex wasnt in to me at the same time he was into others...if you know what i mean. thanks...
 
sockgirl77

sockgirl77

Well-Known Member
nachomama said:
To a point, I agree with you. Texting has become such the norm these days, that it can be very innocent in nature. I have a lot of married guys that text me throughout the course of the day, and I text them, but that in no way means that I want to get with them. :shrug:

Texting at 2:00 a.m., however, could be something different. And if she thinks there's an infidelity problem surfacing, and he's insisting there is not, then she needs to decide if she wants to deal with this behavior or bail. Acting in a psychotic manner is a sure fire way of getting him to bounce though.
Click to expand...

Texting is not the issues. It's what the texts say and the time that they are sent. I have a few guys friends that I text with alot. A few of them are married. I also know their wives. I would never text them at 2am.
 
TBone

TBone

New Member
greeneyes36 said:
Have a friend... keeps telling me stories about current boyfriend... supposed to be in a "committed relationship" with each other... spends the weekend at his place... phone rings 0215a.m. - missed the call but then txt msg follows -- wake ur ass up..trying to hook up with you unless you're with sum1 else... -- they look at the phone and see another msg from earlier in the night - says i guess u kicked me to the curb again huh? he never checked the msg or responded to the earlier one. He tells her its some chick he ran into at bike week (girlfriend couldnt go with him) - numbers got exchanged, says he's not interested... she's txt him few times since then - he just short txt's her back - one word answers... says he did NOT spend time alone with her - just hanging out w/ crowd in clubs..she was friends wth couple of friends of his.... promises he's telling truth..would never do that to her... says -- okay ?? deleted all the contact info and the messages right there in front of her at 2am.....told her that if he gets anymore msgs from her, he will rightly tell her NOT INTERESTED and show her the msgs if he gets anymore from her. NOW... when girlfriend comes crying to me - i dont know what to tell her...??... any thoughts? he's otherwise been honest, caring and very loving... totally into her and wants to spend his nights with her.
Click to expand...

He wouldn't happen to be a PG County fireman, would he? Similar thing happened to me. I dated this guy for 3 years and he pulled this sort of thing all the way through. I realize now how stupid I was. Just like your friend's guy; he loved me, he would never be with anybody else, he was just friends with all these new females he met when he wouldn't take me with him. She needs to open her eyes; if she allows him by with this...it'll just get worse down the road.
 
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redhotmomma

Guest
"trying to hook up with you unless you're with sum1 else..."

This would bother me. I would of made him text her back saying i dont want to hook up with i have a girlfriend etc.... Its a damn if you and damn if you dont kinda thing. She has good reason not to trust him with getting texts like that at 2 am. I would be pissed off too. Thank god my Hubby and I are over the whole clubbing thing.
 
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