When kids disappear ...

[boredincalvert]

I totally agree about now just knowing exactly what's going on EVERYWHERE. There's always been creeps around and always will be until they just give em all the death penalty and be done with it.

As for that 7 year old kid who's dad works at night and leaves him there....at least he freakin works and supports his kid. Have you seen the price of daycare? and do you know how hard it is to recieve custody for your child when you're just the father? Mothers almost always get custody even if they are drug-addicted sluts. I feel like that man (even though I don't really know his story) is truely trying to take care of his child. I'm sure he doesn't enjoy leaving his child at home by himself.

 

[Mousebaby]

I totally agree about now just knowing exactly what's going on EVERYWHERE. There's always been creeps around and always will be until they just give em all the death penalty and be done with it.

As for that 7 year old kid who's dad works at night and leaves him there....at least he freakin works and supports his kid. Have you seen the price of daycare? and do you know how hard it is to recieve custody for your child when you're just the father? Mothers almost always get custody even if they are drug-addicted sluts. I feel like that man (even though I don't really know his story) is truely trying to take care of his child. I'm sure he doesn't enjoy leaving his child at home by himself.

Is that you dear brother?

 

[MissMissy]

My kids are 3 and 6 and we NEVER let them play outside by themselves. However we are the only parents on our court that feel that way. We are always the only parents outside with the kids. I always see young kids (around the same age as my kids) outside by themselves all day riding their bikes in the parking lot. And we always talk about how they can let their kids out by themselves. Anything can happen.

 

[poster]

My daughter will be 7 next week and she won't go anywhere without me. We have a code word we have made up, and one time I even tested her and she passed! My neighbor though, man I want to call Social Services on him. He's a single Dad, the son is no more than 9 but he's very small for his age. He is ALWAYS outside by himself, riding his bike all over the place. We live RIGHT off Rte 4, and yet I see him at 5-6pm riding his bike down the road. Then I started noticing that when I'm leaving the house at 7am the Dad is coming home. So it makes me wonder, and I start to do a little recon work, and I realize: He's leaving this kid home alone at night while he works (at least I assume it's work). Now I know we live in a safe area, and all the neighbors look out for each other, but it took me 5 days of "watching" the house to realize his schedule. 5 days!! That's nothing to a child molestor looking for his next victim! Someone could easily pick up on the schedule and then go knock on that door one night. ARGH, makes me angry. The people that live to the left of him have a little girl who is about 8. One day she comes knocking on my door and wants to know if "that girl I see outside can come play with me". So I say okay let me get my coat and shoes on, and she says very bewildered "YOU PLAY OUTSIDE WITH YOUR DAUGHTER???" So I say yes, and she says well can I play in here? She comes in my house for agood 30 minutes before I tell her she better go ask her Mom. So she does, I watch her walk down there and go in the house, then her Mom comes out on the porch and waves to me and the kid comes running back and says yeah I can play here. THE MOM, WHOM I HAVE NEVER MET BEFORE, LET HER KID COME INSIDE MY HOUSE TO PLAY!!!!! I could have been a convicted sex offender for all she knew! This little girl and the boy I mentioned before are usually outside playing together, ALONE. I can only imagine what goes on when they go in the woods. Makes me shudder!!!

Thanks for letting me vent!!!

I am sooo glad to hear others have this same fear. Sometimes I feel like it's just me being over protective but it doesn't change the way I parent. Recently I had a child show up at my house (with another child that comes often), we do not live in a neighborhood and they must cross a very busy road to get to us. I have only spoken to child's mother on one occation, about a year ago, and my husband to the father once also. We know nothing about one another.

So.. the boy came to the door and asked if could play, my first reaction was to ask if his mother knew where he was. He said yes and that he could play for one hour. At that point I insisted we call her anyway, I'm not goint to take the word of a 7yr old. She never answered the phone. I then called the other child's parent and asked if this was unusual, they offered to call her. She verified it with them and still never called me. I sent him home in an hour, I stood and watched that they safely crossed the road and actually reached his own front door. Not once did I see the parent, he's been back twice and I still have never spoken to his mother.

I don't understand why, in this day and age, anyone would send their child to or, more to the point, into someone else's home that they did not personally speak to.

 

[poster]

One more thought...

What is the neighborly rule for sending kids out to play?

Do you call and ask if they can come over or just send the kids over to ask?

When other children come to your house do you call their parents and tell them or just take for granted they know already?

Aso when you send them home, do you watch or call and be sure they made it?

Just curious....

 

[fjennell]

My kids are 3 and 6 and we NEVER let them play outside by themselves. However we are the only parents on our court that feel that way. We are always the only parents outside with the kids. I always see young kids (around the same age as my kids) outside by themselves all day riding their bikes in the parking lot. And we always talk about how they can let their kids out by themselves. Anything can happen.

i am in the same boat. my daughter is 5 and i don't let her play outside alone. however there are other 5 year olds on our court that have been playing outside alone since they were 3. they knock on my door to come in and their parents don't even know. i always send them to ask their parents and they just come back with its ok - the parent never comes out to speak to me about it or anything. one day one of the kids wanted my daughter to come out to play and i said hold on let me get my shoes - the kid said her mom could watch my daughter and i said no i am the only one that watches my daughter. why? because this is the same kid that's outside without a parent. if they are not watching their own kids, they sure won't watch mine. its scary and i am not one of those parents that think it wont happen to me because we live in a nice neighborhood. it happens everywhere, everyday.

 

[Mousebaby]

i am in the same boat. my daughter is 5 and i don't let her play outside alone. however there are other 5 year olds on our court that have been playing outside alone since they were 3. they knock on my door to come in and their parents don't even know. i always send them to ask their parents and they just come back with its ok - the parent never comes out to speak to me about it or anything. one day one of the kids wanted my daughter to come out to play and i said hold on let me get my shoes - the kid said her mom could watch my daughter and i said no i am the only one that watches my daughter. why? because this is the same kid that's outside without a parent. if they are not watching their own kids, they sure won't watch mine. its scary and i am not one of those parents that think it wont happen to me because we live in a nice neighborhood. it happens everywhere, everyday.

Yes it does, and thank God not everyone has that "Big Sky Theory" going on in their heads. It can also happen to older kids and yes my darling red karma giver, to 15 yr. old boys too! As long as he is under my roof and my supervision he will abide by my rules no matter how silly he or anyone else thinks they are. At least this way I will know I did my job and raised him to adulthood alive and safe!

 

[tiltedangel]

Yes it does, and thank God not everyone has that "Big Sky Theory" going on in their heads. It can also happen to older kids and yes my darling red karma giver, to 15 yr. old boys too! As long as he is under my roof and my supervision he will abide by my rules no matter how silly he or anyone else thinks they are. At least this way I will know I did my job and raised him to adulthood alive and safe!

that is the way i was with my son too! you can never be too careful! just last week there was a show on about a man who used a teen boy to lure other teen boys to him so he could abuse them and then kill them...he killed somewhere in the vicinity of 42 teenage boys! so you are soo right! keep up the good work!

 

[itsbob]

This was in Lexington Park? Hollywood?? Ridge? Where??

 

[Ladybug76]

My kids are 3 and 6 and we NEVER let them play outside by themselves. However we are the only parents on our court that feel that way. We are always the only parents outside with the kids. I always see young kids (around the same age as my kids) outside by themselves all day riding their bikes in the parking lot. And we always talk about how they can let their kids out by themselves. Anything can happen.

Same here. Mine are 6 and 7 and they aren't allowed to play outside without supervision. There is nothing more important to me than making sure my kids stay safe.

 

[crabcake]

One more thought...

What is the neighborly rule for sending kids out to play?

Do you call and ask if they can come over or just send the kids over to ask?

When other children come to your house do you call their parents and tell them or just take for granted they know already?

Aso when you send them home, do you watch or call and be sure they made it?

Just curious....

My neighbors and I have a rule we've dictated to the kids -- do not invite them into the house without first (privately) discussing it with your parent. Putting a parent on the spot in front of the other kids warrants an immediate "no" to come in and play. We all encourage the kids to spend time outside and "be kids" ... climb trees, get stuck in mud, play in the leaf piles, etc. just like we all did as kids. This way, all the "mess" stays outside, and there aren't any calls to parents telling little Janey to come help clean up Susie's room from the mess they made.

Since our kids all play together all the time, they generally just go to each other's house and knock for the kids to come out and play. It's understood that they may play in one person's back yard, and that's fine/accepted by all of us.

We live on a culdesac, and the parents all know eachother pretty well, and have eachother's phone numbers if needed.

 

[smilin]

Boy, I don't want to get into the middle of this, but I grew up in the "city" - and there ain't no city within fifty miles of Lex. Pk. or Lusby.
We played on the streets and parks, got beat up and into fights. But we were never, ever late going home.
Our neighborhood in Lex. Pk. is a nice quiet place with kids everywhere, enjoying being kids. The kids start thinning out as they get older because of studying, after school activities and sports. They need the time to find out how to make decisions, and mistakes before they get to HS and really screw up. We know our neighbors and generally they aren't too overprotective.
I believe we are being oversupplied with so many bad things that it appears we are in a much more violent society than say 100 years ago.
I believe the buzz word for over protectiveness today is called "helicopter parents".

Having said that - YOU are the parent and YOU decide what YOU think is the correct behavior for YOUR kids. Congratulations on being responsible, it sounds like you are a great parent.