Charles Co Dept of Ed has lost it's mind?

[kimx6]

I agree with you. He has Downs Syndrome. These special schools of the public school system are designed with the special needs students in mind, and they already have teachers and instructional assistants in place to provide for their needs. When a special needs student is sent to a "regular" high school, staff must be hired at the regular high school just for that student, which is not cost-effective and defeats the purpose of having these special needs schools.

Hi, I am Logan's mom. Thanks for your interest in our story. Westlake has a Life Skills class. Logan has always been educated in the public school system and he has always gone to his home school.

 

[kimx6]

No, FB did not say from what I could tell. But, on Charles County Public Schools, there are several schools listed on there for special needs students, including the Gwynn Center or something or other. I'm almost sure it would be one of them.

I am Logan's mom, the name of the other school is not important. I do not want it in anyway to look as if we have an issue with that school. It is another high school in the county. It simply is not the appropriate placement for Logan for a number of reasons. Thanks for your interest.

 

[kimx6]

I'm confused, why wouldn't they send him to a school that fits his needs versus one that doesn't? :shrug: BTW, a 30-minute commute to school around here is not that unusual.

Hi, I am Logan's mom, thanks for your interest in our story. Actually, both schools do in fact have Life Skills classes.

I do understand that while to many a thirty minute bus ride may not hinder their ability to benefit from their education, we have documentation stating that such is the case with our son. This information is known to the people who made the decision for his placement. They knew his bus ride would be at least four times longer than the short bus ride to his home school and it was known from past experience that it did not work.

 

[kimx6]

I've never known parents to not exaggerate their kids' abilities. They always make their kids out to be smarter and more able than what they are. I stand with BOE on this one.

Hi, I am Logan's mom. I am confused as to what you read that made you think that I exaggerated his abilities. I actually said that if they needed modifications and supports in place to make his placement work at his home school then do it.

 

[kimx6]

Oh, I'm sorry, perhaps I misunderstood the article. I thought I read that the reason you want him to go to Westlake is so that he can be around his friends.

That is only one issue and it is a legitimate one. There are many issues that I don't expect the general public to know nor at this point in the situation can I put out to the general population.

As far as the article, it orginally started as a letter to a private person-I was then contacted by someone who was interested in our story at the baynet and they asked if I would be interested in a letter to the editor entry. When I said sure, what do I need to do-they said nothing-that they could use what I had already written. Truly, it was written in a much less formal and more personal manner than I would have written it had I originally been writing it for a type of publication.

That being said, I still stand by our belief that the appropriate placement for our son is his home school Westlake. This will not be an easy fight, the law is not black and white. There are many grey areas that are left for interpretation on a case by case basis. I do not know what the outcome will be but I had two choices: do nothing or do something- I had to choose the one that I could live with.

Again, I thank you for your interest in our story. The fact that you heard about it on a forum that I had never even heard of is proof that the story is out. Thanks again for your thoughts!

 

[kimx6]

Opposed to sending him to the school which can already meet his needs?

Not at all, transportation to that school clearly does NOT meet his needs. Thanks again for your interest!

 

[acommondisaster]

Every one of us parents with special needs children have to do a couple of things. First, we have be strong advocates for our child (our kids are in the system until age 21). We have to fight to get services for them, and then we have to fight to keep those services. I could count on it, every year, to hear that they didn't think a couple of hours one on one therapy was helping, they'd try to tell me that she could get it from the classroom teacher throughout the course of the day. They would try to reduce the hours of therapy each week. Eventually I couldn't justify anymore arguments and services were reduced. All of us parents can testify that GETTING a service is more difficult than keeping or reducing one.

I wonder if the parent who is trying to force the issue to send her child to Westlake, with an LS class that isn't equipped to serve her son, is willing to trade a poorer curriculum for the comfort of keeping him in his home school. Because if it's not equipped now, it will always be a battle to get him what he needs there. Has the parent looked at both Life Skills classes? Are all of the services her son needs in place at Westlake?

The other thing a parent of a special needs child needs to do is recognize when they are resisting change and limiting their child. Of course it would be nicer to keep things status quo - so much easier to go pick him when he's sick, go to teacher meetings, so much nicer to have him familiar friends, so much nicer to let him sleep in an extra half hour. But are you limiting your child's potential by putting him in a school ill-equipped for him? Are you keeping him from exploring new friendships?

I don't know this parent and I'm not accusing them - but rather, as a parent who has lived through school and curriculum changes for more than 21 years - I would like them to search within themselves to be sure they are really doing this for the good the child rather than just what feels comfortable. I've been in that position, trying to do what's best for a child who couldn't tell me how they felt about their classroom and it is hard to separate what was best for ME and what was best for HER. There were times when I thought my daughter wouldn't/couldn't/shouldn't have to put up with something, that I found out my daughter COULD.

Good luck to you and your challenges with your son. I hope that a resolution is found that is best for all concerned. On a personal note, it must be very challenging not to be able to have him in the car for more than 30 minutes. I imagine that really limits what you can do as a family.

 

[kimx6]

Every one of us parents with special needs children have to do a couple of things. First, we have be strong advocates for our child (our kids are in the system until age 21). We have to fight to get services for them, and then we have to fight to keep those services. I could count on it, every year, to hear that they didn't think a couple of hours one on one therapy was helping, they'd try to tell me that she could get it from the classroom teacher throughout the course of the day. They would try to reduce the hours of therapy each week. Eventually I couldn't justify anymore arguments and services were reduced. All of us parents can testify that GETTING a service is more difficult than keeping or reducing one.

I wonder if the parent who is trying to force the issue to send her child to Westlake, with an LS class that isn't equipped to serve her son, is willing to trade a poorer curriculum for the comfort of keeping him in his home school. Because if it's not equipped now, it will always be a battle to get him what he needs there. Has the parent looked at both Life Skills classes? Are all of the services her son needs in place at Westlake?

The other thing a parent of a special needs child needs to do is recognize when they are resisting change and limiting their child. Of course it would be nicer to keep things status quo - so much easier to go pick him when he's sick, go to teacher meetings, so much nicer to have him familiar friends, so much nicer to let him sleep in an extra half hour. But are you limiting your child's potential by putting him in a school ill-equipped for him? Are you keeping him from exploring new friendships?

I don't know this parent and I'm not accusing them - but rather, as a parent who has lived through school and curriculum changes for more than 21 years - I would like them to search within themselves to be sure they are really doing this for the good the child rather than just what feels comfortable. I've been in that position, trying to do what's best for a child who couldn't tell me how they felt about their classroom and it is hard to separate what was best for ME and what was best for HER. There were times when I thought my daughter wouldn't/couldn't/shouldn't have to put up with something, that I found out my daughter COULD.

Good luck to you and your challenges with your son. I hope that a resolution is found that is best for all concerned. On a personal note, it must be very challenging not to be able to have him in the car for more than 30 minutes. I imagine that really limits what you can do as a family.

Hi, I am Logan's mom. Thanks for your interest in our story. I have certainly looked at both classes. At this point it has not been determined as to which placement would meet his needs-that is up for dispute. I can tell you this that at the school "They" want to send him to there is what is considered a High functioning LS class and a Moderate LS class. We were told he would be able to spend a lot of time in the high functioning class there. SO why not let him go to his home school?

I do not think we would be limiting his potential at all, I strongly believe keeping him at his home school would greatly enrich his life. I recommend looking up a case that is from our district (Devries v. Fairfax County) and reading paragraph 12 of the answer. It talks about the importance of socializing and the amount that it is covered under the law (IDEA). Unfortunately though as you will see the court did not find for the parents. Theirs was a different scenario though as I don't believe the home school had a LS or similiar special needs program.

I don't see it at all as not allowing him to explore new friendships-I look at it as giving him the opportunity to strenghten his existing ones and I am sure he still doesn't know everyone at Westlake, even though they all may very well know who he is by the time we are done. Being in a LS classroom does not give him a lot of time to meet a lot of new friends-no matter where he is. That is a big part of the reason why it is so important to have him with the kids that he did sit side by side for most of elementary school. You would be amazed by what some of the students from Davis middle school have posted on our FB page. We have always felt so blessed by the way our community has embraced him.

Very important: My son wants to go to Westlake. You know I understand that each child is different, so for some kids the parents may feel differently than we do. However, for the people that know our son they agree with us-of course other than the handful of people that got us to where we are now with our story.

Oh and by the way, fortunately for us we have a dvd player in our van and when we get someone after a long ride we let him move and stretch his legs-we don't have him sit at a desk to begin six hours of work. Again, I thank you for your interest.

 

[Bann]

Every one of us parents with special needs children have to do a couple of things. First, we have be strong advocates for our child (our kids are in the system until age 21). We have to fight to get services for them, and then we have to fight to keep those services. I could count on it, every year, to hear that they didn't think a couple of hours one on one therapy was helping, they'd try to tell me that she could get it from the classroom teacher throughout the course of the day. They would try to reduce the hours of therapy each week. Eventually I couldn't justify anymore arguments and services were reduced. All of us parents can testify that GETTING a service is more difficult than keeping or reducing one.

I wonder if the parent who is trying to force the issue to send her child to Westlake, with an LS class that isn't equipped to serve her son, is willing to trade a poorer curriculum for the comfort of keeping him in his home school. Because if it's not equipped now, it will always be a battle to get him what he needs there. Has the parent looked at both Life Skills classes? Are all of the services her son needs in place at Westlake?

The other thing a parent of a special needs child needs to do is recognize when they are resisting change and limiting their child. Of course it would be nicer to keep things status quo - so much easier to go pick him when he's sick, go to teacher meetings, so much nicer to have him familiar friends, so much nicer to let him sleep in an extra half hour. But are you limiting your child's potential by putting him in a school ill-equipped for him? Are you keeping him from exploring new friendships?

I don't know this parent and I'm not accusing them - but rather, as a parent who has lived through school and curriculum changes for more than 21 years - I would like them to search within themselves to be sure they are really doing this for the good the child rather than just what feels comfortable. I've been in that position, trying to do what's best for a child who couldn't tell me how they felt about their classroom and it is hard to separate what was best for ME and what was best for HER. There were times when I thought my daughter wouldn't/couldn't/shouldn't have to put up with something, that I found out my daughter COULD.

Good luck to you and your challenges with your son. I hope that a resolution is found that is best for all concerned. On a personal note, it must be very challenging not to be able to have him in the car for more than 30 minutes. I imagine that really limits what you can do as a family.

Your situation sounds very similar to my situation with my son. And not just in Maryland.

 

[nachomama]

As if he wouldn't get that if he went to Westlake? It's not like whatever bus he rides would just take him. They would pick up other special needs students along the way too, and drop them off wherever they need to go.

This is true, but if he goes to his home school, chances are there are other special needs children in his area that would be able to ride the same bus as him. If he goes to a school other than his home school, chances are he will be on a bus by himself or will be on a bus for 1 hour plus while the bus travels from one end of the county to the other to pick up special needs kids. I used to do special needs transportation; I know how it works.

Just a quick reply - Gwynn Center is for "at risk"...ie behavioral problems, kids who have been dumped by their parents, that sort of thing. It's no longer, nor has it been for many years, a "special ed" school. Prior to its current status, it was a resource center. Least restrictive is done in the public schools.

I thought they had changed the format (for lack of a better word) at Gwynn several years ago.

 

[bulldog]

So, what's the tipping point? Would a 25, 20, 15, 10 minute bus ride be acceptable?
How is the 30 minute bus ride be any more disturbing to a child than a classroom session?
But, this really is about more than the bus ride. It's about your desire to have him in a comfortable social setting that he is used to. Nothing wrong with that, but why should I, John Q tax payer be strapped with the extra costs that would be associated with making Westlake right for him? Can you honestly tell me that there would be no additional costs to the system? Are you willing to personally fund the changes that would be necessary for him to attend Westlake?
Seems to me that learning to "deal with" the issues are all very much a part of the life skills process and will help him learn to tolerate the unfortunate disturbances which certainly will be part of his future.
It's good that you are fighting for what you think is right for your child. There are many out there who would not devote the time and energy that you have and will continue to devote.
I wish you and your family the very best, but can't say that I side with you on this issue.
Good luck.

 

[Chasey_Lane]

Seems to me that learning to "deal with" the issues are all very much a part of the life skills process and will help him learn to tolerate the unfortunate disturbances which certainly will be part of his future.
It's good that you are fighting for what you think is right for your child. There are many out there who would not devote the time and energy that you have and will continue to devote.
I wish you and your family the very best, but can't say that I side with you on this issue.
Good luck.

 

[pelers]

A couple of points here:

That is only one issue and it is a legitimate one. There are many issues that I don't expect the general public to know nor at this point in the situation can I put out to the general population.

If you want public support on this (I assume that was why you went along with allowing your letter to be published) you need to be public about these issues. You can't try and rally people to your cause while at the same time telling them to mind their own business.

I don't see it at all as not allowing him to explore new friendships-I look at it as giving him the opportunity to strenghten his existing ones and I am sure he still doesn't know everyone at Westlake, even though they all may very well know who he is by the time we are done. Being in a LS classroom does not give him a lot of time to meet a lot of new friends-no matter where he is. That is a big part of the reason why it is so important to have him with the kids that he did sit side by side for most of elementary school. You would be amazed by what some of the students from Davis middle school have posted on our FB page. We have always felt so blessed by the way our community has embraced him.

What is going to happen after high school when all of his friends go away? They'll be going off to college, moving out of town for jobs and just be otherwise busy starting their own families and such. You've put your child into a position now where he's never had to make new friends and all of his old ones are mostly gone.

After high school I assume the goal is for him to be able to be self supporting and self sufficient. His school buddies are not going to be at whatever job he's holding. He's going to have to learn to make those new friends from scratch. I think you are denying him an excellent opportunity to learn how to do this while in a protected environment.

and finally:

I actually said that if they needed modifications and supports in place to make his placement work at his home school then do it.

I hate to be a jerk, but the schools are incredibly strapped for money right now. Accommodating your son is going to be expensive. They will probably have to hire extra personnel (even if it is "just" an aide) and upgrade their programs. To do that I'm sure you have to go through a big bureaucratic mess where people need to come in and evaluate what is already in place, evaluate your son to find out what is still needed, so on and so forth. It's not cheap.

Demanding that the school spend this money so that your one child is accommodated is unfair to all of the other kids who attend this school. The money to accomplish these changes doesn't come out of thin air. It has to be taken from currently existing services. Are you willing to take current services away from many children just so that your son can go to school with his friends? Or finance the changes yourself?

Now, if no other schools existed in the area that had the programs your son needs, I could really understand pushing this issue. But that isn't the case. There is a school that has a program that your son's advisors feel is best for him.

With regards to the bus ride, what is it about long trips your son doesn't deal well with? Could you put him on the bus with a book, game boy, one of those handheld dvd players? Something to occupy him for the ride?

I really do respect that you are fighting for your son. I just don't think that that this is the battle you should have chosen. Best of luck to you and your son.

 

[Sweet 16]

Hi, I am Logan's mom, thanks for your interest in our story. Actually, both schools do in fact have Life Skills classes.

I do understand that while to many a thirty minute bus ride may not hinder their ability to benefit from their education, we have documentation stating that such is the case with our son. This information is known to the people who made the decision for his placement. They knew his bus ride would be at least four times longer than the short bus ride to his home school and it was known from past experience that it did not work.

I skipped some of the comments but is there a reason you can't transport him to school yourself? You seem intent on everyone else making accommodations for your son -- can't YOU make accommodations by adjusting your schedule a little so your son won't have to endure a long bus ride to the school that best fits his needs? I don't mean to sound insensitive and I'm sure you've made your share of sacrifices but I'm just wondering if you driving him is an option since you haven't mentioned it? Parents with non-special-needs kids do it all the time for various reasons.

 

[vraiblonde]

Hi and welcome Kim! Nice to have the person we're talking about show up to answer questions and clarify the situation. I also don't side with you on this issue, but I think it's great that you're putting forth the time and energy to do what you think is right for your son.

 

[czygvtwkr]

Not at all, transportation to that school clearly does NOT meet his needs. Thanks again for your interest!

Needs and desires are two different things.

 

[acommondisaster]

As the parent of a special needs child, I am empathetic. I understand the frustration of assuming what made sense to me would be the path followed, and I know how exhausting it can be to be the (sometimes seemingly sole) advocate for her.

But I am not sympathetic.

I feel that this is a matter of "we want him in his home school no matter the cost to others". "Adjust the program to HIS needs, although they exist elsewhere." Just because he's "covered" by IDEA and FAPE and LRE doesn't mean what CAN be done IAW them is what is best for Logan.

For those unaware, high school for special needs kids is different. High school becomes less about academics and more about preparing them for the rest of their lives, and it may be that there's another school with a program more tailored to Logan's LONG TERM needs. The schools have job placement (I dont remember the exact term) and job coaches and facilitators who will do more than teach him even the most mundane and minute things associated with being the most independent he can be. I'm sure Logan's mom understands that. His IEP should have (or will be starting to have) goals that reflect long term goals that get him ready for life as an adult.


I get that it's nice to hear "he's a rock star", "everyone likes him" "he has lots of friends". Been there. Done that. At SIX different schools. We worry about our kids being accepted even more than other parents do. But Logan's parents need to know that the vast majority of kids in a school setting will be kind to the Life Skills students - they're encouraged to help them, from grade school on. As I mentioned before, everywhere we go someone will come up to us and tell us they went to school with our daughter and it is always heartening to hear.

If Logan's mom was told there were no services available for her son, or if they neglected him in some way, I'd be all over it with support. But what I'm seeing is a family that seems to want the world to change for their son - and if that's their attitude, they're in for a rude awakening once he turns 21 and leaves the nuturing school environment behind. It is not so easy to "demand" things to make Logan's and their lives easier once he turns 21.

Good luck to them, I just hope they search their hearts and are sure of the real reason they're doing this - I'd hate to see him miss out on an opportunity just to keep things as they are.

 

[DipStick]

Bann -- check your PM box.

 

[DipStick]

Kim, what school are they trying to send Logan to?

 

[Bann]

But, this really is about more than the bus ride. It's about your desire to have him in a comfortable social setting that he is used to.
...
Seems to me that learning to "deal with" the issues are all very much a part of the life skills process and will help him learn to tolerate the unfortunate disturbances which certainly will be part of his future.
It's good that you are fighting for what you think is right for your child. There are many out there who would not devote the time and energy that you have and will continue to devote.
I wish you and your family the very best, but can't say that I side with you on this issue.
Good luck.

A couple of points here:
If you want public support on this (I assume that was why you went along with allowing your letter to be published) you need to be public about these issues. You can't try and rally people to your cause while at the same time telling them to mind their own business.

What is going to happen after high school when all of his friends go away? They'll be going off to college, moving out of town for jobs and just be otherwise busy starting their own families and such. You've put your child into a position now where he's never had to make new friends and all of his old ones are mostly gone.

After high school I assume the goal is for him to be able to be self supporting and self sufficient. His school buddies are not going to be at whatever job he's holding. He's going to have to learn to make those new friends from scratch. I think you are denying him an excellent opportunity to learn how to do this while in a protected environment.

and finally:
...
Now, if no other schools existed in the area that had the programs your son needs, I could really understand pushing this issue. But that isn't the case. There is a school that has a program that your son's advisors feel is best for him.

With regards to the bus ride, what is it about long trips your son doesn't deal well with? Could you put him on the bus with a book, game boy, one of those handheld dvd players? Something to occupy him for the ride?

I really do respect that you are fighting for your son. I just don't think that that this is the battle you should have chosen. Best of luck to you and your son.

Very well put - I agree.

Hi and welcome Kim! Nice to have the person we're talking about show up to answer questions and clarify the situation. I also don't side with you on this issue, but I think it's great that you're putting forth the time and energy to do what you think is right for your son.

It seems as if she is telling just enough of the story to rally people on her side and to make her son seem like a victim of unfair treatment, but she is hiding facts which may allow people to make an informed decision on where they stand on the issue.

It seems this way, I hope it isn't.

Needs and desires are two different things.

As the parent of a special needs child, I am empathetic. I understand the frustration of assuming what made sense to me would be the path followed, and I know how exhausting it can be to be the (sometimes seemingly sole) advocate for her.

But I am not sympathetic.

I feel that this is a matter of "we want him in his home school no matter the cost to others". "Adjust the program to HIS needs, although they exist elsewhere." Just because he's "covered" by IDEA and FAPE and LRE doesn't mean what CAN be done IAW them is what is best for Logan.

For those unaware, high school for special needs kids is different. High school becomes less about academics and more about preparing them for the rest of their lives, and it may be that there's another school with a program more tailored to Logan's LONG TERM needs. The schools have job placement (I dont remember the exact term) and job coaches and facilitators who will do more than teach him even the most mundane and minute things associated with being the most independent he can be.

THIS ^^

WE are entering this last phase of HS with Thing1. He will be MORE involved with DDA & DORS as a "transitioning youth".
[Think preparing for college is a frustrating maze? Try this on for size. But I digress!]

I'm sure Logan's mom understands that. His IEP should have (or will be starting to have) goals that reflect long term goals that get him ready for life as an adult.

I get that it's nice to hear "he's a rock star", "everyone likes him" "he has lots of friends". Been there. Done that. At SIX different schools. We worry about our kids being accepted even more than other parents do. But Logan's parents need to know that the vast majority of kids in a school setting will be kind to the Life Skills students - they're encouraged to help them, from grade school on. As I mentioned before, everywhere we go someone will come up to us and tell us they went to school with our daughter and it is always heartening to hear.

If Logan's mom was told there were no services available for her son, or if they neglected him in some way, I'd be all over it with support. But what I'm seeing is a family that seems to want the world to change for their son - and if that's their attitude, they're in for a rude awakening once he turns 21 and leaves the nuturing school environment behind. It is not so easy to "demand" things to make Logan's and their lives easier once he turns 21.

Good luck to them, I just hope they search their hearts and are sure of the real reason they're doing this - I'd hate to see him miss out on an opportunity just to keep things as they are.

Very well said - and I totally agree.