________ Wife.

[SoMD_Fun_Guy]

Ok, just to stir the pot in this discussion some more:

With all the Navy Wife, Army Wife, Trophy Wife, Soccer Mom, etc so-called titles -
How come you never see a "_______Husband" or "______Dad" bumper sticker?

A bunch of us got talkin about this at lunch today and one of the guys joked around that he wants to get a "MILF Husband" bumper sticker.

Made me think, what do the ladies on the forum think about the term "MILF"?

 

[2lazy2P]

Quick question-how old are your kids? I took about a week break before I started my current job so that I could deep clean my house before starting another 9-5, and having my 1 year old around "helping" made everything go at least twice as long since certain things had to be done at least twice. As SoMDGirl said, kids can trash a house quicker than you can clean it.

5 and 9 year old boys.

 

[Roberta]

I have no children, and work full time, but *some* activities that I do in my "free time" include:

*Meal planning for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks
*Meal prep including grocery shopping, coupon clipping, veggi chopping etc. My life would be simpler if I had my own prep cook. I also include doing dishes in that.
*Beds - daily make up beds. Weekly wash and clean all bedding. Remake bed(s).
*Floors - sweep, vaccum, mop
*Baseboards - dust and wipe down baseboards
*Doors, walls, windowsills and lightswitches - wipe down and clean off grime/dust/fingerprints
*Dusting - furniture, knicknacks and miscellaneous other items
*Bathroom(s) - remove hard water deposits from shower, sinks and toilet. Clean and disinfect.
*Laundry - stain removal treatment, sort laundry, wash and dry approprately. Put away laundry. Iron laundry if necessary.
*Windows - wash windows. Also wash curtain treatments.
*Ceiling - remove cobwebs and clean ceiling fans.
*Fridge - clean out fridge/freezer, check for expired food, clean shelves, seals, doors, handles and top.
*Cabinets - dust and wipe down. Reorganize and rotate items on shelves.
*Recycling and trash - gather - sort and haul away.
*Indoor plants - water, maintain, and feed as necessary
*Dogs - feed, water, treat, bath, clip nails, clean ears, brush teeth, wash their bedding and toys, vet trips, etc
*Outdoor - sweep porches, mow yard, weed gardens, water plants, run from snakes.
*Miscellaneous - take clothes to dry cleaners when necessary, run errands, schedule vet appointments, doctor appointments, dentist appointments, mail family/friend birthday cards, sympathy cards, congratulation cards, post office trips, pay bills, pick up household items, etc.


This doesn't even cover KIDS!!! And it doesn't cover EVERYTHING!!!

Do you realize how long it actually takes to do laundry? Do you realize how time consuming it is to properly clean a bathroom? Do you have any clue how exhausting it is to spend a whole day running errands?

I'd love a freaking housewife, and I would never ever take advantage of her and I'd buy her flowers every week and take her out to dinner regularly.

Last weekend, I cleaned house all day Friday. Got up early Saturday and ran errands all freaking day including grocery shopping. Came home and finished laundry. Then Sunday, I spent the whole day do yardwork. I didn't get everything done. I was exhausted come Monday and was happy as crap to go to work on Monday morning, only to come home and see trash and laundry and dust and thinking the yard already needs to be mowed again.

I applaude and give great kudos to every house wife and house husband out there. Because it's a daunting and overwhelming job that never ends.

WOW, you do ALL of this and you are married. I hope your husband brought "A LARGE ENDOWMENT" to the marriage.

 

[2lazy2P]

You and your family obviously do not clean nor maintain your home to my standard. :shrug: Trust me, I clean the house it's a 16 hour day and I do NOT finish everything. I mow the yard it takes 4 hours.

Your family obviously does not share the responsibilities of maintaining your home to my standard. :shrug: Trust me, I work all day and come home and help my wife clean the house and put in a 16 hour day. I mow the yard, it takes 5 hours. We DO finish everything daily.

 

[vraiblonde]

I must be one sucky housekeeper and Mom because all the chores Mig mentioned don't take me more than a few hours a week. Even when I had kids and a husband hanging around. Probably the feeding thing was the most hands-on time consuming, and even that was maybe an hour a day to prep and cook, then another hour a week for grocery shopping. Everything else, you just do it as you go along.

Stain removal treatment takes, what? Half a second? Making a bed, around 30 seconds?

 

[2lazy2P]

I must be one sucky housekeeper and Mom because all the chores Mig mentioned don't take me more than a few hours a week. Even when I had kids and a husband hanging around. Probably the feeding thing was the most hands-on time consuming, and even that was maybe an hour a day to prep and cook, then another hour a week for grocery shopping. Everything else, you just do it as you go along.

Stain removal treatment takes, what? Half a second? Making a bed, around 30 seconds?

Exactly what I was trying to get at. Knowing the usual attitude on the boards, everybody tried to drag the drama out in the situation and make it look like I was bashing my wife because she sits around and eats bon bons all day or something. Obviously as Nickel helped point out - never did I once insinuate that. But my point being there is not enough to keep a stay at home mother busy 5 days a week, 9 hours a day. There just isn't, plain and simple. Do I care that my wife gets to relax during the day? Of course not, we are blessed to be able to have her at home with the kids for field trips, medical appointments, etc. while I go to work during the day and bring home the dough.

 

[CRoyal]

Since we're moving into the women as home-makers conversation... If you can afford to stay home and rear children and take care of the house on one income then more power to you, especially in this economy. Keep in mind that if you choose to do that, THAT is your JOB. Don’t whine when the husband comes home and doesn’t do the dishes or vacuum, that is your job.

On the other side, if both people work then the work in the house and yard should be split 50/50.

 

[2lazy2P]

Since we're moving into the women as home-makers conversation... If you can afford to stay home and rear children and take care of the house on one income then more power to you, especially in this economy. Keep in mind that if you choose to do that, THAT is your JOB. Don’t whine when the husband comes home and doesn’t do the dishes or vacuum, that is your job.

On the other side, if both people work then the work in the house and yard should be split 50/50.

Sorry, did not mean to hijack your thread. This went longer than I expected it to. But in dealing with your most recent comment, I totally agree with you. Now, does this mean that after dinner I shouldn't help with the dishes or fold a load of laundry? Of course not. I helped make the mess and I (and the kids) will help clean the mess. Do I feel I need to come home after a 10 hour day and break out the vacuum and clean dust bunnies while she played facebook games all day? Of course not.

 

[ICit]

Since we're moving into the women as home-makers conversation... If you can afford to stay home and rear children and take care of the house on one income then more power to you, especially in this economy. Keep in mind that if you choose to do that, THAT is your JOB. Don’t whine when the husband comes home and doesn’t do the dishes or vacuum, that is your job.

On the other side, if both people work then the work in the house and yard should be split 50/50.

AMEN!

so help me god... I should make my SIL read this! Lazy beyotch!

 

[CRoyal]

Sorry, did not mean to hijack your thread. This went longer than I expected it to. But in dealing with your most recent comment, I totally agree with you. Now, does this mean that after dinner I shouldn't help with the dishes or fold a load of laundry? Of course not. I helped make the mess and I (and the kids) will help clean the mess. Do I feel I need to come home after a 10 hour day and break out the vacuum and clean dust bunnies while she played facebook games all day? Of course not.

It's cool.. I like to see input on gender roles and relationship dynamics. Yeah I mean pitching in when you get home from working all day is good, but expecting you to overhaul the home when she was home all day to do just that, not a fair deal.
Ladies want equality, let's see it.

 

[SoMDGirl42]

AMEN!

so help me god... I should make my SIL read this! Lazy beyotch!

The difference here is she is not a stay at home mom. She never stays home.

 

[vraiblonde]

But my point being there is not enough to keep a stay at home mother busy 5 days a week, 9 hours a day. There just isn't, plain and simple.

There is, it's just not housework and cooking. If you have a baby or pack of toddlers at home, yeah, they're going to eat up your time. Otherwise there should be plenty of opportunity for leisure activities.

I dunno, when I was a SAH, I considered that my job. The husband went to work and earned the dough, and I took care of the house stuff and the kids. Occasionally he'd do dishes or something like that, but we both absolutely considered that a "favor" and not something that was expected. He didn't do any laundry that I recall because that was my job and it was taken care of while he was doing his own work. Even baths and other tedious kid crap was mostly mine, with him doing it every so often to cut me a break.

 

[lovinmaryland]

There is, it's just not housework and cooking. If you have a baby or pack of toddlers at home, yeah, they're going to eat up your time. Otherwise there should be plenty of opportunity for leisure activities.

I dunno, when I was a SAH, I considered that my job. The husband went to work and earned the dough, and I took care of the house stuff and the kids. Occasionally he'd do dishes or something like that, but we both absolutely considered that a "favor" and not something that was expected. He didn't do any laundry that I recall because that was my job and it was taken care of while he was doing his own work. Even baths and other tedious kid crap was mostly mine, with him doing it every so often to cut me a break.

I was a SAHM for 8 years. You wake up clean, make everyone breakfast, then you clean up from breakfast, play with kids, upppp lunch time so you make lunch, then you clean from lunch,

Hubby never came home from work and had to clean or cook dinner. He always came home to a clean house and dinner either cooking or ready to eat.

I know several SAHM now who expect their hubbys to come home help clean, watch the kids, and sometimes even cook dinner. Blows my mind

Right now B is the stay at home Dad. He is really good at cleaning but the cooking....not so much So I normally come home and handle that. BUt I never have to come home from working to a messy house, laundry to do, etc... I trained him well

 

[bcp]

There is, it's just not housework and cooking. If you have a baby or pack of toddlers at home, yeah, they're going to eat up your time. Otherwise there should be plenty of opportunity for leisure activities.

I dunno, when I was a SAH, I considered that my job. The husband went to work and earned the dough, and I took care of the house stuff and the kids. Occasionally he'd do dishes or something like that, but we both absolutely considered that a "favor" and not something that was expected. He didn't do any laundry that I recall because that was my job and it was taken care of while he was doing his own work. Even baths and other tedious kid crap was mostly mine, with him doing it every so often to cut me a break.

My woman just does whatever the hell I tell her to do.
As intended by God himself.

 

[2lazy2P]

Right now B is the stay at home Dad. He is really good at cleaning but the cooking....not so much So I normally come home and handle that. BUt I never have to come home from working to a messy house, laundry to do, etc... I trained him well

That would be me! I can clean my butt off but I am lost in the kitchen. Never trust a skinny cook.

 

[ICit]

The difference here is she is not a stay at home mom. She never stays home.

I forgot... you have to be at home to clean your house and cook!

I was a SAHM for 8 years. You wake up clean, make everyone breakfast, then you clean up from breakfast, play with kids, upppp lunch time so you make lunch, then you clean from lunch,

Hubby never came home from work and had to clean or cook dinner. He always came home to a clean house and dinner either cooking or ready to eat.

I know several SAHM now who expect their hubbys to come home help clean, watch the kids, and sometimes even cook dinner. Blows my mind

Right now B is the stay at home Dad. He is really good at cleaning but the cooking....not so much So I normally come home and handle that. BUt I never have to come home from working to a messy house, laundry to do, etc... I trained him well

how bout you train someone else we know!!

 

[nicole_M]

I must be one sucky housekeeper and Mom because all the chores Mig mentioned don't take me more than a few hours a week. Even when I had kids and a husband hanging around. Probably the feeding thing was the most hands-on time consuming, and even that was maybe an hour a day to prep and cook, then another hour a week for grocery shopping. Everything else, you just do it as you go along.

Stain removal treatment takes, what? Half a second? Making a bed, around 30 seconds?

I was/am a SAHM for the past 8 years. I have a part time job but I only work during school hours.

I don't NEED to work, but once the kids were in school, it was pointless [and boring, more importantly] for me to be home. I keep a very neat home as I am a little OCD but it certainly does NOT take me hours upon hours to clean.

I think because I keep our home so clean, and keep up on everything like laundry [daily, even if it's one load], I don't have to spend 6 hrs. cleaning on a Saturday.

BTW - We have an 8 year old and 6 year old twins, and they make a mess on a DAILY basis, but 15 minutes of picking up and it's back to clean again. I make 4 beds each morning and Vrai, you're right, it takes 2 minutes each, maybe. Those bunks are a PITA.

My husband travels for work and is gone for a combined 8 months/year, and when he is on the road he is generally working 7 12's. He just got home from the Dominican Republic on Wed. night and he has cooked for the past 2 nights. We definitely share responsibility here but I still think it's more of "my job" to do the house and yard stuff, and that is MY choice, if I asked or wanted him to do more, he'd happily do it. I take care of all our finances as well. He just basically makes the dough and gets to travel the world.

Again, I think the longest it's EVER taken me to clean this house [and I mean down and dirty] was 6 hours. And that would be a waste of cleaning supplies and time if I felt I had to do that on a daily basis.

 

[RareBreed]

I was/am a SAHM for the past 8 years. I have a part time job but I only work during school hours.

I don't NEED to work, but once the kids were in school, it was pointless [and boring, more importantly] for me to be home. I keep a very neat home as I am a little OCD but it certainly does NOT take me hours upon hours to clean.

I think because I keep our home so clean, and keep up on everything like laundry [daily, even if it's one load], I don't have to spend 6 hrs. cleaning on a Saturday.

BTW - We have an 8 year old and 6 year old twins, and they make a mess on a DAILY basis, but 15 minutes of picking up and it's back to clean again. I make 4 beds each morning and Vrai, you're right, it takes 2 minutes each, maybe. Those bunks are a PITA.

My husband travels for work and is gone for a combined 8 months/year, and when he is on the road he is generally working 7 12's. He just got home from the Dominican Republic on Wed. night and he has cooked for the past 2 nights. We definitely share responsibility here but I still think it's more of "my job" to do the house and yard stuff, and that is MY choice, if I asked or wanted him to do more, he'd happily do it. I take care of all our finances as well. He just basically makes the dough and gets to travel the world.

Again, I think the longest it's EVER taken me to clean this house [and I mean down and dirty] was 6 hours. And that would be a waste of cleaning supplies and time if I felt I had to do that on a daily basis.

We just separated our boys into different rooms so no more making bunk beds. I work full-time but my hours are 5am-1:30pm so I get home by 3pm. I make up a "to do" list each day of stuff I want to get done after work before starting dinner. Usually things like laundry, vacuuming/dusting, etc. That way when Saturday and Sunday come, the house is pretty much perfect and minus stripping the bed and remaking them and some light chores, I can relax and enjoy my time away from work.

 

[lovinmaryland]

I forgot... you have to be at home to clean your house and cook!





how bout you train someone else we know!!

In our situation we dont/didnt have much $ to do stuff so it was a once a week thing that I took the kids out somewhere special. We did the normal Library once a week, park a couple times, etc... ya know the free stuff.

I am sure if we would have had more $ I would have gone out more. But I would NEVER EVER leave my house w/ out it being cleaned just incase B came home early and I personally dont like coming home to a messy house.

Again, I think the longest it's EVER taken me to clean this house [and I mean down and dirty] was 6 hours. And that would be a waste of cleaning supplies and time if I felt I had to do that on a daily basis.

In Migs case though both her and her hubby work full time all week so she doesnt have the luxury of cleaning a few hours each day.

I HATED coming home when we both were working. It was so hard to get the house undercontrol when you work full time during the week.

 

[nicole_M]

In our situation we dont/didnt have much $ to do stuff so it was a once a week thing that I took the kids out somewhere special. We did the normal Library once a week, park a couple times, etc... ya know the free stuff.

I am sure if we would have had more $ I would have gone out more. But I would NEVER EVER leave my house w/ out it being cleaned just incase B came home early and I personally dont like coming home to a messy house.







In Migs case though both her and her hubby work full time all week so she doesnt have the luxury of cleaning a few hours each day.

I HATED coming home when we both were working. It was so hard to get the house undercontrol when you work full time during the week.

Oh I definitely understand and can appreciate that.

It was a big challenge when I first started working, but I make it work. And I feel like I contribute so much more to our family now.