Christy
b*tch rocket
Probably not a good idea. If I were in his shoes and you posted stuff about my kid on the internet to a bunch of strangers I'd ##### slap you and probably wind up in the klink for domestic violence.
Dating and Spoiled Children
- Thread starter riverview
- Start date
Probably not a good idea. If I were in his shoes and you posted stuff about my kid on the internet to a bunch of strangers I'd ##### slap you and probably wind up in the klink for domestic violence.
Chasey_Lane
Salt Life
I would come and visit with you.Probably not a good idea. If I were in his shoes and you posted stuff about my kid on the internet to a bunch of strangers I'd ##### slap you and probably wind up in the klink for domestic violence.
Otter
Nothing to see here
Probably not a good idea. If I were in his shoes and you posted stuff about my kid on the internet to a bunch of strangers I'd ##### slap you and probably wind up in the klink for domestic violence.
:womenbehindbars:
Cowgirl
Well-Known Member
Probably not a good idea. If I were in his shoes and you posted stuff about my kid on the internet to a bunch of strangers I'd ##### slap you and probably wind up in the klink for domestic violence.
Why? It's a bunch of strangers? Like anyone can figure out who she/he/daughter is?
Chasey_Lane
Salt Life
Cowgirl
Well-Known Member
I've figured out people before by their posts.
Not many people here are as smart as you are.
I recommend that you RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN. I was in the same relationship Five years. It took me several years before I woke up thinking I can make a difference wome to find out I was wasting my time becuase the support from the mother was not there. Life is too short to spend it correcting other parties childrens behavior.
Probably not a good idea. If I were in his shoes and you posted stuff about my kid on the internet to a bunch of strangers I'd ##### slap you and probably wind up in the klink for domestic violence.
I didn't mention any names. If all people went around slapping others for posting thoughts on the interent about others, the jails would be overflowing. I was simply looking for advice and went to an appropriate palce to do so...a forum on dating and marriage.
SoMDGirl42
Well-Known Member
Was I the only one to picture vrai and Pixie together in a jail cell slinging insults back and forth at each other?
OP, good luck with your situation. I'm keeping my opinions to myself on this one.
Dye Tied
Garden Variety Gnome
So you are hoping to show him these opinions telling you to run and you think it will give him a wake up call to change things? Good luck!
I wasn't seriously thinking of showing him the thread. Not all responses were telling me to run. There's a variety of comments, some good, some obnoxious. But, thats to be expected when you post in a forum. If nothing else, the thread has created a moments entertainment for a few.
Dye Tied
Garden Variety Gnome
Whew! It sounded as though you were serious...since we don't know you.
Nah...I know that if I did that, I would have no more worries about the 13 year old!
tiltedangel
New Member
Oh you give me such hope! Thank you! I am very glad it worked out for you!
you're very welcome
I know there are alot who disagree but it is hard being 13 and i honestly think that she would really hit it off with you (which would make things a whole lot easier). when my kids (step children included) went into their teens, i started trying to put myself back there. I started to be their friend in a lot of ways, while still maintaining mother status.the thing is too, if they like you they will respect you.
To the OP
You really need to take the time and discuss your feelings with the dad and give it a few days of thought and reflection before you just end things. IMO.
To KVj and the OP poster as well. Any child that lives in or stays in your home is subject to your house rules. You may not be a bio parent or even a step-parent as of yet. You are still a Boss though and children of any age should be taught the importance and understanding of repecting a boss. I actually know of a woman who was in her late teens at that time who was involved with an older man (10- 14 years older) he had a 10 year old at the time and she was a pistol to put it nicely. She caused a ton of friction out of jealousy but in the end they worked it all out. The kid grew up and moved away, they married and had their own little girl.
I dated a guy in 95 that was 38 at the time & I was 25. He had a teen daughter that lived with him and she & I got along great. He had a huge blow up with her one day and demanded that I search her room as he had heard she was smoking weed. That was a really hard thing for me as I really liked her and related with her on so many levels yet I had to stand there and beg her to just hand the crap over so he would be appeased. She did hand her stuff over but in the end it was just too much for me. I was not prepared to be a Mom figure to an older teen. At that time it was just hard enough figuring out who I was going to be.
I guess I am pretty lucky as in my current situation. I think my kids are better behaved and show more respect to my partner than I think they even give me at times. They think he is so cool. Well unless he asks them to do a few chores or put their bikes in the garage etc... Of course he will probably laugh and tell you different. In the end any partnership that is involved in raising kids requires that both partners be on the same page. It's not a contest in the end, it is about raising productive, respectful and responsible kids that will take care of us when we get old.
Well I can hope can't I ?
You really need to take the time and discuss your feelings with the dad and give it a few days of thought and reflection before you just end things. IMO.
To KVj and the OP poster as well. Any child that lives in or stays in your home is subject to your house rules. You may not be a bio parent or even a step-parent as of yet. You are still a Boss though and children of any age should be taught the importance and understanding of repecting a boss. I actually know of a woman who was in her late teens at that time who was involved with an older man (10- 14 years older) he had a 10 year old at the time and she was a pistol to put it nicely. She caused a ton of friction out of jealousy but in the end they worked it all out. The kid grew up and moved away, they married and had their own little girl.
I dated a guy in 95 that was 38 at the time & I was 25. He had a teen daughter that lived with him and she & I got along great. He had a huge blow up with her one day and demanded that I search her room as he had heard she was smoking weed. That was a really hard thing for me as I really liked her and related with her on so many levels yet I had to stand there and beg her to just hand the crap over so he would be appeased. She did hand her stuff over but in the end it was just too much for me. I was not prepared to be a Mom figure to an older teen. At that time it was just hard enough figuring out who I was going to be.
I guess I am pretty lucky as in my current situation. I think my kids are better behaved and show more respect to my partner than I think they even give me at times. They think he is so cool. Well unless he asks them to do a few chores or put their bikes in the garage etc... Of course he will probably laugh and tell you different. In the end any partnership that is involved in raising kids requires that both partners be on the same page. It's not a contest in the end, it is about raising productive, respectful and responsible kids that will take care of us when we get old.
Well I can hope can't I ?
I
Irish_Eyes
Guest
Personally... I don't think I would run the risk of having my children around another child like that, especially when I was trying to keep the image that the parent of said child was my equal. My parents didn't spank me at 13, but you can damn well be sure that I'd get a good backhanding if I'd thrown something at them or berated them the way she does. Or even worse... my mom would have called one of her friends, who though she isn't a blood relative, I look at as my aunt... She'd have grabbed me by the ear and worn my ass out, or would have put me through some sort of manual labor... the dirtiest cleaning job she could come up with, most likely.
I've heard of people "working it out" in situations like these, but from what I've seen of human nature in general, its that people don't change. If he isn't enforcing the rules now, he's certainly not going to enforce them later.
Just wait until after you two end up married and she wrecks her brand new car that daddy bought her for her sweet 16 and he expects you to help pay to get her a new one. If it were me, I'd run as fast as I could.
I've heard of people "working it out" in situations like these, but from what I've seen of human nature in general, its that people don't change. If he isn't enforcing the rules now, he's certainly not going to enforce them later.
Just wait until after you two end up married and she wrecks her brand new car that daddy bought her for her sweet 16 and he expects you to help pay to get her a new one. If it were me, I'd run as fast as I could.