Dealing with People "Spreading the Word"

[BudoPo]

So there I was, minding my own business and getting work done on the car when a couple of people walked up to me. They were from the Calvert Baptist Church, and were spreading the word/trying to save people.

While they were going through their schpeel (sp?) I was about to argue some of their points, but figured that would just keep them around longer.

I hate to be rude to someone's face (especially, in their mind, they're doing something good), but does anyone have a good way to tell these people to bugger off? I'm starting to think that the next time I'll just cut them off and tell them to save their breath and/or go pound sand.

 

[Heretic]

Soon as I see the name tags I shut the door before they even say a word.

 

[vraiblonde]

I cut them off right away, tell them I'm not interested, get in my car and leave. They're not even the worst - those little magazine sellers are THE VERY WORST!!!!! As obnoxious and persistent as people can be. I'm rude to them, too. I figure they were rude first...

 

[Tonio]

Wouldn't it be weird to see Wiccans going door to door looking for converts? Of course, I once met a Wiccan who was just as self-righteous as Pat Robertson. Sort of like the one in the terrible sequel to The Blair Witch Project--"WE DON'T BOIL CHILDREN AND EAT THEM!"

 

[Slynx]

I too find it hard to be rude to people who are only following their heart.....but......I find that what works for me is when I tell them I have a congregation (Church) that I am very happy with and already have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. What else is there for them to say? That usually brings about a "Thank you Maa'm and have a great day". Back to the coldest beer in St. Mary's county.....

 

[Sharon]

Lucky me, they never venture down my road...or maybe it's the big dog that scares them away.

I did have someone approach me in the parking lot a few weeks ago. All I got was a phamplet and they they walked away! Maybe they didn't want to help me load all those bags of groceries into the back of my car.

I usually just take whatever they are giving, smile and say, "Thank you, you're preaching to the choir." Wish them a happy day and they usually leave.

 

[Tonio]

Originally posted by jetmonkey
Just flash 'em the 'secret devil sign' and ask if they would like to come to your services instead.

You could invite them to a Slayer or King Diamond concert!

 

[Frank]

I've had them come to my door. A polite "No thank you, I am not interested" has *always* worked for me. They went away and said something like "God bless you" or something.

I personally don't find them any more annoying OR insulting than the kids who ask to mow my grass or rake my leaves.

 

[BudoPo]

Well, this time they caught me in the middle of doing some minor work on my car. They handed me one of their pamphlets. I said, "I'm Jewish" and handed it back to them, hoping they'd get the point, but they didn't take it back, and I think it just made them more zealous. I swear they must have a special section in their training guide for when they meet Jews. I was going to argue his points, or correct his statements about Judaism, but figured that would just prolong the whole thing.

I think next time I'll just tell them something like "Look, I appreciate your view, but you're not going to convince me of anything, so please don't waste your time or mine." Straight and to the point, and not really rude. I did once discuss some questions I had about what they were saying, and their logic really, really made no sense.

Funny story: a friend of mine's father really didn't get along with their next-door neighbors for years. Then, when they (my friend and his dad) moved, they sold the house to a bunch of Jehovah Witnesses. He said to my friend, "I'm a nasty f***er, aren't I.", to which my friend agreed.

 

[vraiblonde]

I don't mind the ones who just stop by to invite you to their church - I always thank them for the invite and think that's actually a nice community thing. It's the ones who want to convert you that I have a problem with. You can always tell them right away, too, because they're not particularly friendly - they always have this weird smile and brainwashed look on their face.

And, yes, Budo, your friend's neighbor should be shot for that...

 

[jimmy]

I think it's much worse when it's "covert".

Me and my friends were recovering at a Denny's after Wrestlemania this year (ppv). Well, we were talking about it and this young guy a bit older than us came up and started asking us what had happened. We told him and struck up a conversation.

He talked about playing Rugby and drinking in Ireland (many of the guys I was with are Ruggers) and suddenly out of nowhere, he's like "just wanted to tell you that Jesus loves you and the Lord has a plan for you!"

Then, he proceded to interrogate each one of us as to whether or not we had given real thought into accepting Jesus as our personal Lord and Savior! So there we were for like a 1/2 hr just trying to be polite but really feeling called out as he was like trying to get our phone numbers so he could get us out to these bible studies he ran on weekends....man...weird...

I felt really duped and that's what ticked me off. But I guess it wasn't a bad way to get our attention at first by feining interest in what we were talking about...

 

[Frank]

I spent nearly nine years of my life in a group where we had to do stuff like that at least once, every single day. And the general word was, if you ain't converting people, you're not serious about your walk with God.

It's been 13 years out, and I have to say, all my red flags and alarms go right up when anyone is out-of-the-blue friendly for no reason. I figure they are peddling *something*. The only thing you can bet isn't trying to sell you something is a DOG.

Jimmy, it was worse with us, and I have to admit, I did some of the worst things. In fact, we generally didn't get around to the Jesus stuff until we were best buddies - you know, like maybe a week or two later, when the prospective recruit was friends with the whole crowd. It took a lot of fighting the system and in-your-face confrontations with my religious leaders, but I finally made the break. My conscience got the better of me. It's always wrong to deceive, no matter what the reason.

Most of them will go away if you're firm but polite. We usually had the same rule - if they show the slightest interest - even if they argue - go back, you got a live one. If they just say no thanks, leave it be. (Some folks would go back to someone who made a BIG fuss, because in their mind, they figured they found someone internally conflicted with their beliefs).

If someone presses on AFTER I've politely asked them to go, to me, all bets are off - but it STILL works to shame them by being polite and tell them "I did ask you politely, and you are ignoring my wishes; if you won't respect me, then I don't have any respect for your religion. Get off my property, please". It might not seem to have an effect, but if you do it respectfully, they feel pretty stupid - I know, cause I was one of those guys once.

 

[BudoPo]

That really stinks. Befriending someone just so that you can try to "save" them. Glad to hear you've stopped that nonsense. I never had that happen to me, but I'd probably just avoid the person after that.

Vrai, you have a good point. Interfaith discussions can be very interesting, so long as they're just there to talk and learn, not to convert the others. We've had a couple of events like that, which have been pretty good.

I usually don't discuss things with the people who knock on your door, since I just want them to go away. Occassionally, though, I'll go ahead and ask them questions to make them think about their faith, or how mine is not what they think.

My brother once let them ramble on and on, and then just said, "I'm an atheist", which left them stunned (he's not an atheist, BTW).

 

[andwhat]

I actually had a guy on the Metro a few weeks ask me if I'd found Jesus. I said, I didn't know he was lost. He left me alone after that.

 

[SxyPrincess]

Originally posted by andwhat
I actually had a guy on the Metro a few weeks ask me if I'd found Jesus. I said, I didn't know he was lost. He left me alone after that.

I'll have to remember that the next time they come knocking at my door!

 

[daniel]

Ahhhh being evangelized at denny's that was good stuff jimmy. I actually enjoyed talking to the guy...not for religious discussion but his interesting life that he alluded to. we were there for a while though.

Sometimes I am annoyed when people approach me about finding God/Jesus and accepting him into my life. I understand they are doing something they truely believe is the right thing but at the same time it seems like the wrong approach...especially deceiving someone. I also try not to be annoyed because it is impossible to stop, like sh!t, it happens, deal with it and move on. Plus if you are secure enough in your beliefs/spirituality then it is not a threat to you just an annoyance.

Some things will never change, I think this is one of them....just like bad drivers, the cable guy not showing up, and traffic jams.

 

[fuzzyng]

Originally posted by vraiblonde
those little magazine sellers are THE VERY WORST!!!!! As obnoxious and persistent as people can be.

Actually, whats worse is, and i dont want to sound mean, the children that are like trying to sell candy bars, pizza, or magazines for their school... Now, I too, am a sucker for a Door-to-Door Candy Man, but the prices are SO way like unreasanable...

but, back to the point at hand...

I know, sometimes, people can be overbearing when their view is their highest thing on their agenda. but what you need to do is like politly say "Sorry, i'm not interested" and if they persist, then get upset and rude back.

 

[BudoPo]

Well, that guy came back about an hour ago. He handed me a booklet, and asked if I thought about what he said last weekend. I told him no, thanked him for the booklet, and when he offered to come in and discuss things, I said "No, that's ok". The whole bit was over in less than 5 minutes.

What really irks me is the booklet was written specifically aimed at Jews. This isn't the first time this has happened. As if I don't have enough things to deal with in my everyday life, now I have to deal with this.

Here's a funny aside. My cats walk up to pretty much everyone who comes to my apartment except for one person I know. I say that it's because of the person's small, closed mind (I don't say this to their face, of course). So while I was talking to this guy tonight, with my door open, I was wondering why the cats didn't try a jail break and run outside. When he left and I shut the door, I turned around and saw the cats had run off and were watching from a safe distance.

So let's see: person from work (small mind) and they run away. Friends with open minds and the walk up and play. Baptist guy trying to save my soul (small, closed mind) and they run away. Well, they say animals are more perceptive than we are.

 

[Tonio]

What really irks me is the booklet was written specifically aimed at Jews.

BudoPo, I don't blame you one bit. The whole concept of proselytizing troubles me, because it assumes that there is One True Faith. Throughout human history, that notion has led to the deaths of millions.

 

[jimmy]

"The whole concept of proselytizing troubles me, because it assumes that there is One True Faith. Throughout human history, that notion has led to the deaths of millions"--Tonio

And it continues to do so today...yet another reason why I find agnostacism more comfortable...AND, another reason for Church and state to be as seperate as possilbe...but that's for another thread I guess...