Does anybody like their kids?
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Yeah man. Because of my home situation, I was somewhat of a group effort - I lived all over the place and wasn't even in-state for most of the summer. I wouldn't trade those experiences for the world.kwillia said:
W
Wenchy
Guest
kwillia said:
I have vivid and beautiful memories.
The Weeping Willows, Sycamore's, Magnolia's, Sassafrass, and Pomegranates....we knew what was what.
We each had a dollar.
Walking down that dirt road with candy on our mind.
Getting to that country store, and me changing my mind.
I wanted a BIG DILL (Out of that HUGE jar), a pickled egg, and a pickled sausage.
There was nothing left once we got back.
Feet were dirty, and into the bath we went.
This was the "Deep South" in 1973, and part of my life.
MysticalMom
Witchy Woman
I love my girls. They are my life. And while I joke about wanting to sell them on ebay, I really do enjoy spending time with them. (really I do.)
Now granted. I don't have teeny tiny ones. I have 3 teens and an 8 (going on 30) year old. I have a house to take care of and zoo to tend. I have clients to read and lots to do. And even though I'm a SAHM we ALL share the load. Even my 8 year old. I don't kill myself like onebdzee sounds like she does in a day.(gees woman, you need a spa day!) The kids do their own laundry mostly (this is new), help keep the house and even share the chore of cooking dinner sometimes. We have time together on a daily basis, and do lots of special family things.
BUT even with all that...they're still crazy kids....and I need a break too. A REGULAR break. I need some time to just be Candace and not Mom. I enjoy my alone time and will grab that break WHENEVER and WHEREVER I can. I am lucky enough that both sets of grandparents live near by. They take them occasionally and I wish they would take them more often because I would gladly let them. For the kids sakes yes, for the grandparents sakes yes(I understand that completely pix and don't think theres a thing wrong with it.) But honestly, it's MOSTLY for my sake. And Friday nights, unless a special family event is planned, are for ME. No ifs, ands or buts about it.
I adore my children. They are very good girls and I'm very lucky. But If I don't take these little breaks I go stir crazy. I stress out. Every mom needs a little down time. I see absolutely nothing wrong with that! It doesn't mean I love my kids any less or that I'm a bad mom. I think my breaks make me a BETTER mom. THEY think so too.
And onebdzee...for moon sakes,take a day off woman! That's an order.
Aren't your kids older too?
Now granted. I don't have teeny tiny ones. I have 3 teens and an 8 (going on 30) year old. I have a house to take care of and zoo to tend. I have clients to read and lots to do. And even though I'm a SAHM we ALL share the load. Even my 8 year old. I don't kill myself like onebdzee sounds like she does in a day.(gees woman, you need a spa day!) The kids do their own laundry mostly (this is new), help keep the house and even share the chore of cooking dinner sometimes. We have time together on a daily basis, and do lots of special family things.
BUT even with all that...they're still crazy kids....and I need a break too. A REGULAR break. I need some time to just be Candace and not Mom. I enjoy my alone time and will grab that break WHENEVER and WHEREVER I can. I am lucky enough that both sets of grandparents live near by. They take them occasionally and I wish they would take them more often because I would gladly let them. For the kids sakes yes, for the grandparents sakes yes(I understand that completely pix and don't think theres a thing wrong with it.) But honestly, it's MOSTLY for my sake. And Friday nights, unless a special family event is planned, are for ME. No ifs, ands or buts about it.
I adore my children. They are very good girls and I'm very lucky. But If I don't take these little breaks I go stir crazy. I stress out. Every mom needs a little down time. I see absolutely nothing wrong with that! It doesn't mean I love my kids any less or that I'm a bad mom. I think my breaks make me a BETTER mom. THEY think so too.
And onebdzee...for moon sakes,take a day off woman! That's an order.
Aren't your kids older too?
onebdzee
off the shelf
crabcake said:I need a day off from time to time, and I ain't afraid or ashamed to admit it! Single parenthood isn't easy -- I ain't biatchin'; it's my choice. But it's also my choice to determine if/when I need a break for some 'me time' ... Taking a step away from parenting is no different than taking a day off work -- I love what I do and the people I work with, but who doesn't need a mental health day every now and then? :shrug:
I also need a day off from time to time....Granted I have to plan it well in advance and I do take it....My "me time" is in the morning in-between getting kids out the door and after the last one gets on the bus....I have even taken a night every once in a "blue moon" and go out and have a good time with people that are over the age of 30!
My kids are older than Pixies and they do help out a lot around the house....but, as she knows and everyone else with more than one kid knows, the more kids the more work, cleaning, laundry, etc.....And as they get older the more activities they have also(after school, sports, dances, friends, etc)
I wasn't trying to put Pixie down for what she does....It is her choice to do that....and I just didn't/don't choose the same thing
BadGirl
I am so very blessed
I not only love my child, but I adore him. He is just the coolest thing under the sun, and my time with him thus far has been beyond my wildest dreams. But he's too new to have gotten on my nerves yet, despite the howls at 3:30 in the morning for a feeding and diaper change. Already he has displayed a pleasant temperament, and seeing him smile nearly brings me to tears with joy.
I expect that on my CWS days - when I return to work - that I'lll keep him home with me. On those rare days when I'm feeling the need for some "me" time, I am confident that little Bubba's five aunts - his Other Mother's - and his two half-sisters will gladly step in to spend time with him. I'm very lucky that Bubba has a large extended family that is excited to get to know him and want to be around him. I just hope it stays that way!
I expect that on my CWS days - when I return to work - that I'lll keep him home with me. On those rare days when I'm feeling the need for some "me" time, I am confident that little Bubba's five aunts - his Other Mother's - and his two half-sisters will gladly step in to spend time with him. I'm very lucky that Bubba has a large extended family that is excited to get to know him and want to be around him. I just hope it stays that way!
nomoney
....
BadGirl said:
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I remember this, "WHENEVER you need a babysitter or some time for yourself you just call us and we'll babysit whenever!!" "I cant wait to just come steal them from you for a weekend", etc....
now it's "ummmmm, well I was really looking forward to washing the dog tonight", "well, I'm going to kansas tomorrow so I have to go buy gas" "I just found out I'm allergic to kids-sorry"
kwillia
n/a
Don't be comparing sweet little Bubba to your beasts...nomoney said:
I remember this, "WHENEVER you need a babysitter or some time for yourself you just call us and we'll babysit whenever!!" "I cant wait to just come steal them from you for a weekend", etc....
now it's "ummmmm, well I was really looking forward to washing the dog tonight", "well, I'm going to kansas tomorrow so I have to go buy gas" "I just found out I'm allergic to kids-sorry"
onebdzee
off the shelf
nomoney said:
I remember this, "WHENEVER you need a babysitter or some time for yourself you just call us and we'll babysit whenever!!" "I cant wait to just come steal them from you for a weekend", etc....
now it's "ummmmm, well I was really looking forward to washing the dog tonight", "well, I'm going to kansas tomorrow so I have to go buy gas" "I just found out I'm allergic to kids-sorry"
Better yet....You have teenagers that are supposed to be "responsible" enough to watch the younger ones and you do get to go out and 20 minutes after you walk out the door you get the phone calls about how the 7 yr old is eating Cheetos for dinner, they have locked the 12 yr old in her closet and the dog is gaging on a sock
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Chasey_Lane
Salt Life
You gonna' let Pixie 'have it' again?onebdzee said:
Better yet....You have teenagers that are supposed to be "responsible" enough to watch the younger ones and you do get to go out and 20 minutes after you walk out the door you get the phone calls about how the 7 yr old is eating Cheetos for dinner, they have locked the 12 yr old in her closet and the dog is gaging on a sock
That was my whole freaking summer last year.onebdzee said:
Better yet....You have teenagers that are supposed to be "responsible" enough to watch the younger ones and you do get to go out and 20 minutes after you walk out the door you get the phone calls about how the 7 yr old is eating Cheetos for dinner, they have locked the 12 yr old in her closet and the dog is gaging on a sock
This year they are all begging (even the oldest!) to be placed in some activity, camp, day care, ANYTHING but stay home together.
pixiegirl
Cleopatra Jones
onebdzee said:
That's right you didn't CHOSE the same thing yet you look down your nose at me (or at least came across that way with your *shakingyourheadindisbelief*) for the choices that I made. I asked my ob to tie my tubes after #1 but at 22 she wouldn't. I know my limits.
Don't be bitter because you with 5, an absent baby daddy, and a momma that lives 3 hours away don't have the same opportunities that I do with 2, a baby daddy and a mom that lives within an hour. I refuse to apologize for taking a "me" day 3-4 days a year on a Federal Holiday that my daycare provider is open. I refuse to feel sorry for letting my mom have my kids one day a week so that I can go home and hang out with my other half, or the dog if he's working or mop the freaking floors. Contrary to what you may think you know, I RARELY go out. There are plenty here that can attest to the fact that I've been invited to plenty of outings and have been unable to attend because I am home with my kids. I could certainly afford to get a sitter but 90% of the time chose not to because I'd rather hang out with my kids.
You chose your life, I chose mine it's as simple as that. I'd certainly not look down on you for your choices and I'd expect the same in return. Apparently I expected too much. And since I'm such a selfish person I guess it's only by God's good grace that I have two very healthy and VERY happy boys.
She just said she doesn't look down on you and wasn't trying to put you down, you nagin.pixiegirl said:
Pixie, all this defensiveness and protest over comments that you have blown completely out of proportion tell me that you feel guilty about something. So what is it? You can tell us....
pixiegirl
Cleopatra Jones
vraiblonde said:Enough of that - everyone.
I think this was just a misunderstanding. Pix took Onebdzee's comment the wrong way and got snitty, and Onebdzee took offense and let her have it.
I'm not knocked up but I fear you may be going through the change of life or something.
I don't think I took anything the wrong way. I took her comment as belittling my parental responsibilities because they aren't as much as her which was exactly how I took her response as well. I'm sure they're not. I chose to only have 2 kids. Choice, it's a wonderful thing!
And sounding bitter over the choices you've made and your circumstances is far from "letting me have it" in my opinion.