no wonder I wasn't feeling it. I was sitting here rolling up crunched bay leaves.
kwillia
n/a
I didn't see it like that... here is the way I see it..."Mother-to-be leaves man who beats and abuses her. It is brought to her attention that a friend of the family has a daughter and son-in-law that would love to adopt the baby. She meets them, likes them and agrees to let them adopt with the condition that if the adoption can't go thru, birth-mother wants baby back, they witness birth of the baby and take him home. Birth-mom is happy for boy until a couple years in when she hears POS birth-father wants full custody of kid. She doesn't want that to happen so she takes kid back. Courts find no reason for birth-mother not to have kid so they let her have him. Birth father has visitation rights now too. Parents who raised kid are now SOL.Sharon said:Let's see if I got this straight. Under the ruse of adoption, mother abandons baby...dad finds out and wants the kid...judge sends kid back to mother.
Mom is a POS. I'll bet dad gets sued for child support next.
kwillia
n/a
The info regarding the birth father being an abusive person came out in a couple news stories I watched over the weekend... I will see if I can find it in an online article... The maternal grandmother is against either one of the birth parents raising the kid. She had been fighting hard for the adoptive parents to keep the boy because they provided the loving, stable home the boy needs.Sharon said:Did I miss that in the original post?
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Bruzilla
Guest
I read the court papers that have been released, and there's no mention of the father being abusive or any other negatives, but I'm not surprised to hear those allegations being made by the adoptive family... who I just learned refused to allow the father to have visitations with the child after he found out he was a father... too dramatic for the child they say. 
Also, "anger management issues" and "likes to beat up people" are common and vague ways to attack the character of someone. I would have been convicted of having anger management issues if I had been tried during the Steelers game on Saturday.
The birth mother is a total
She knew how the father would react, which is to say... like a father should react... and that's why she put that condition on the adoption. She knew the adoptive parents were well-off people and could provide a good home, so there's no other reason why the adoption would get nixed except for if the father objected.
By the way... the reason that I was able to read the court papers, which had been formerly sealed, is that the judge got fed up by the media and PR blitz that the adoptive family put up down here. For a judge to unseal records, you know it must have been one for the record books! The adoptive parents have been cheating the system for three years now. They waited to formalize the adoption, they refused to allow the father to visit the child, and then they started attacking the judge for granting custody to the mother. He unsealed the records because the adoptive parents had put out so much disinformation and lies about the case he felt he had to set the record straight. But the video of them telling the kid that he was leaving... and telling him on tape that "It's ok to be mad, it's ok to be upset..." and getting the kid riled up, was just pitiful. My kids acted the same way when I told them they couldn't have candy at that age, and to make a video that was so clearly staged and intended to show an upset three-year old, is just reprehensible in my book.
Even if the father did have "anger management issues", he's still showing himself to be a better parent than the rest of this crowd.
Also, "anger management issues" and "likes to beat up people" are common and vague ways to attack the character of someone. I would have been convicted of having anger management issues if I had been tried during the Steelers game on Saturday. The birth mother is a total
She knew how the father would react, which is to say... like a father should react... and that's why she put that condition on the adoption. She knew the adoptive parents were well-off people and could provide a good home, so there's no other reason why the adoption would get nixed except for if the father objected.By the way... the reason that I was able to read the court papers, which had been formerly sealed, is that the judge got fed up by the media and PR blitz that the adoptive family put up down here. For a judge to unseal records, you know it must have been one for the record books! The adoptive parents have been cheating the system for three years now. They waited to formalize the adoption, they refused to allow the father to visit the child, and then they started attacking the judge for granting custody to the mother. He unsealed the records because the adoptive parents had put out so much disinformation and lies about the case he felt he had to set the record straight. But the video of them telling the kid that he was leaving... and telling him on tape that "It's ok to be mad, it's ok to be upset..." and getting the kid riled up, was just pitiful. My kids acted the same way when I told them they couldn't have candy at that age, and to make a video that was so clearly staged and intended to show an upset three-year old, is just reprehensible in my book.
Even if the father did have "anger management issues", he's still showing himself to be a better parent than the rest of this crowd.
Pete
Repete
Is it just me or when you see stories like this it is the usual reaction to jump to the conclusion that judges and the courts are screwed up? Todays media seem very adept to and known for one sided sensational reporting. Why are people so quick to conclude the judge/courts screwed up?
Everyday thousands of cases are settled or adjudicated in family courts. A teeny percentage end up in the news and yet this teeny percentage has caused the judiciary as a whole to be tainted and viewed with a jaundiced eye. The judge sat there and had the benefit of listening first hand to the testimony of all involved, court investigators, guardian ad litem, and established case law. I find it hard to second guess a judge with all that based on a report from WSUX's crack Geraldo reporter. Not saying that the teeny percentage of cases are not adjuticated incorrectly, or not the way we logically think they should be because of case law or statutory structure, but I think the judiciary has gotten a bad rap.
I think it is sad.
Everyday thousands of cases are settled or adjudicated in family courts. A teeny percentage end up in the news and yet this teeny percentage has caused the judiciary as a whole to be tainted and viewed with a jaundiced eye. The judge sat there and had the benefit of listening first hand to the testimony of all involved, court investigators, guardian ad litem, and established case law. I find it hard to second guess a judge with all that based on a report from WSUX's crack Geraldo reporter. Not saying that the teeny percentage of cases are not adjuticated incorrectly, or not the way we logically think they should be because of case law or statutory structure, but I think the judiciary has gotten a bad rap.
I think it is sad.
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Bruzilla
Guest
Just as an "oh by the way", since a couple people asked about racial stuff, all of the parties involved are caucasian.
Here's an interesting aside though... this story is on the news all the time down here, and I can't recall ever seeing a picture of the kid by himself. When they show a picture of him it's always these studio pictures of him with his bleached-blonde adoptive mother... those cheesy pics where the women get a 15-minute turn in the hair and make-up chair and then are plopped in front of the camera. Everytime I see one of those pictures on the tv I can't help but think "trophy kid" since he's got blonde hair and is cute as all get out, and the adoptive mom's got her mug smacked up against his. yeech!
Here's an interesting aside though... this story is on the news all the time down here, and I can't recall ever seeing a picture of the kid by himself. When they show a picture of him it's always these studio pictures of him with his bleached-blonde adoptive mother... those cheesy pics where the women get a 15-minute turn in the hair and make-up chair and then are plopped in front of the camera. Everytime I see one of those pictures on the tv I can't help but think "trophy kid" since he's got blonde hair and is cute as all get out, and the adoptive mom's got her mug smacked up against his. yeech!
kwillia
n/a
Bru... I can't, for the life of me, figure out why you are so hostile towards the adoptive parents...Bruzilla said:
They agreed to the adoption before the kid was born, they were there for his birth... they raised him for the past three years. It was luck of the draw the kid had blonde hair. If I were them I would fight tooth 'n nail too... :shrug:
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Bruzilla
Guest
Pete said:
You should have heard the racket made after the judge unsealed the records! The adoptive family started accusing the judge of lying about the case and alledged that the records that were provided to the press were untrue. I guess the only "just for the record" comments they go by are there own as the truth means nothing to them.
Pete
Repete
Doesn't FL have sunshine law? If so do the disclosure laws pertain to family court? If you are correct and the judge unsealed the records just because he felt he needed to justify his position that was wrong. Judges should make rulings based on law, and the only person they should have to answer to is the appelat court and not a media blitz from a littigant.Bruzilla said:
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Bruzilla
Guest
kwillia said:Bru... I can't, for the life of me, figure out why you are so hostile towards the adoptive parents...
I can appreciate what the adoptive parents did for the kid, and I feel that they got screwed over by the birth mother... who also screwed over the father. This woman knew exactly what she was doing, and it was all about getting even with her ex-boyfriend. But, since she's the birth mother, there's no other over-riding factor to determine if she should get custody and I think that's wrong. I think that fathers get the shaft in these cases all the time, and it really annoys me.
As for the adoptive parents, fighting for the kid is one thing, but what they have done goes well beyond the pail. They have blocked access to the father; they've engaged in character attacks on the father, the judge, and anyone else who's objected to their case; and now they're making the victimhood rounds of the talk shows with this outrageous video. And all because a guy just wanted to live with his kid, which I think is the real core issue here. Sorry, but any sympathy that I had for the adoptive parents ended when I heard how they were treating the birth father, and hostileness came into play with everything else they've done since then.
All I hear are story after story about how awful it is for the adoptive parents and the child, and these stories play on every heart string in the book. But no one ever mentions the dad except to portray him as a villian for stopping the adoption and now for being a wife beater or God knows what.
As for the blonde hair remark, my point was not that the kid has blonde hair. It was that every picture they show of him has him made up with his adoptive mother in a studio shot. There are no pictures of him with the adoptive father, as a family with both parents, at the beach, or any other pics you would more commonly see. All you see are the pictures of a middle-aged woman trying to look younger and prettier than she is with her trophy kid. I've found that people like that are pretty, for lack of a better word, yeech.
B
Bruzilla
Guest
Pete said:
You're 100% right, and that should give you an idea of just how bad things have been down here. I've never heard of a judge opening records like this before. But I've never seen this huge a disinformation campaign being waged either.
kwillia
n/a
Okay... I understand where you are coming from now, but I don't understand had you can be so quick to come to the defense of the birth father. If he was an upstanding person then the courts would have not had the right to withhold the child from him. I agree with Pete that in most cases, the courts are privie to a 'bigger picture' than the rest of the folks involved and I have to question why the father wasn't considered a candidate for custody. Please don't jump straight to "because father's never have any rights" because I don't believe that to be an "automatic judgement" these days. :shrug:
Dupontster
Would THIS face lie?
The sad part about this whole situation is. Here you have a kid that everyone wants for whatever reason, but in that 3 year olds eyes, he probably thinks that no one wants him. They keep moving him around and fighting over him.
Daddy_O
Big Wheelin'
the only real info I know about the case is from what I have read here, and I right now have taken sides with none of the parties except the child.
How are people going against the adoption rules? I was under the belief that if a child is adopted, it is legally binded and the birth mother loses all rights to the child. the past few years it seems like that a child can be given up, then reclaimed at whatever point the birth parent is ready to be a parent. or thinks they are ready. I don't understand that.
How are people going against the adoption rules? I was under the belief that if a child is adopted, it is legally binded and the birth mother loses all rights to the child. the past few years it seems like that a child can be given up, then reclaimed at whatever point the birth parent is ready to be a parent. or thinks they are ready. I don't understand that.
Stang Girl
Mr. and Mrs.!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[/QUOTE] But up until now, not one media story has dealt with the birth father! He's the other victim in this story, yet the only time he's mentioned is as a oh-by-the-way when they talk about why the adoption was challenged. When he goes on the Today show tommorrow will be the first time anyone in Jacksonville has heard his story. This was a case of a vindictive mother trying to get back at a boyfriend. She knew that the father would be notified of the adoption, and would likely challenge it, and that's why she stipulated that if the adoption failed she would get the kid back. The only way the adoption could fail would be if the father opposed and sought custody, and she wanted to make sure he didn't get the kid. She didn't want the kid, she just wanted to make sure the father didn't get him.
What bothers me is this birth mother is a piece of garbage, yet the judge in the case insists on sending the kid to her. The media is obsessed with highlighting the suffering of the adoptive parents. And the father - the true parent in all of this, is completely left out.[/QUOTE]
Sound like St. Mary’s County
What bothers me is this birth mother is a piece of garbage, yet the judge in the case insists on sending the kid to her. The media is obsessed with highlighting the suffering of the adoptive parents. And the father - the true parent in all of this, is completely left out.[/QUOTE]
Sound like St. Mary’s County