Larry Gude
Strung Out
It wasn't inadvertent. It was THE point and THE question I asked.
Help me think of a good punishment
- Thread starter Misfit
- Start date
It wasn't inadvertent. It was THE point and THE question I asked.
MMDad
Lem Putt
Your point seemed to be WGAF about grades.
Larry Gude
Strung Out
My intent was to ask 'Why punish?" as in, "Why do you think you should punish the kid?" with the intent of them then answering "Well, I think they should be punished because of X, Y and Z..." I guess I need to work on a better way of asking "Why punish?" :shrug:
RareBreed
Throwing the deuces
I watch my kids' grades through the PIV website. Mini heart-attacks every so often when I see grades tank. But if I pull up the assignment list, the teacher has but "Z" in for the grade instead of leaving it blank because it hasn't been graded yet. That "Z" sends the final grade into the crapper. I wish teachers would stop doing that. One teacher left it in there so long, the bad final grade showed up on the interim report card. Once he graded the assignment, the final grade shot up to an A. 
Would you prefer "consequences" instead?
As in, "Cs or better or you're coming home"? If you recall, that was one of the harder things I've ever done in my life, but come home she did because we had a deal.
Larry Gude
Strung Out
I blocked that out. That was AWFUL. And I have no idea if that was the right thing to do or not. That was AWFUL.
Retrodeb54
Surely you jest ...
Holding my hand worked for me, they both got on my nerves so bad.
I came home with a few one grading period and boy was I punished. No yelling, no screaming just a calm hell. If I picked up the phone it was "Deb let me see what you did in school today"...Head in to watch TV "Deb come here, did you do your book report yet? ...knock on the door, "No, shes getting ready to tell me everything her math teacher talked about today in class"...Going to walk to Highs for a Pepsie "Wait up, Dad will walk with you" "I can go by myself, I always do, I'm old enough." Dad said "Not responsible enough though."
I asked why they were hounding me and the reply was simple. "Well we thought you were responsible enough to know to study, listen in class and know what is expected of you in school and do it. We were wrong, so we will hold your hand and walk you through everyday, like when you were little. When you show us you can handle it yourself, we might let go of your hand again."
I came home with a few one grading period and boy was I punished. No yelling, no screaming just a calm hell. If I picked up the phone it was "Deb let me see what you did in school today"...Head in to watch TV "Deb come here, did you do your book report yet? ...knock on the door, "No, shes getting ready to tell me everything her math teacher talked about today in class"...Going to walk to Highs for a Pepsie "Wait up, Dad will walk with you" "I can go by myself, I always do, I'm old enough." Dad said "Not responsible enough though."
I asked why they were hounding me and the reply was simple. "Well we thought you were responsible enough to know to study, listen in class and know what is expected of you in school and do it. We were wrong, so we will hold your hand and walk you through everyday, like when you were little. When you show us you can handle it yourself, we might let go of your hand again."
MOM!! I know how to do such and such!
Well, clearly you don't because you can't seem to do something as elementary as bringing your books home when you know you have homework. I don't want you to hurt yourself.
Geez, I thought I was the only parent who ever did that. One of the brats would lie to me (the oldest and youngest were the WORST!), so I told them that because they have shown themselves to be a liar I have to assume everything that comes out of their mouth is a lie, and treat them accordingly.
Larry Gude
Strung Out
Misfit
Lawful neutral
It was easy when I was a kid. If I got a bad grade my mom would help me study to get it back up. If I refused to work with her or was being a little turd, she'd tell dad and he'd hit me. He was a fixer like that. I remember him taking away “air” once. You wouldn’t think that was possible but interestingly enough, it was. I don’t let things like that happen in my house and I would like to think we could come up with a reasonable solution. We’ve been down the take everything away route before and the reasoning route. Its stressful being able to look at the grades online, I’m sure the kids hate it more, but I guess it’s better to be able to fix stuff before it’s on the report card than to just get slammed with it out of the blue. I suggested what tilted said about giving them a D effort and it made me look :smort: (thanks tilted!) so that may be something we try on the weekend.
getbent
Thats how them b*tch's R
I like this idea. My youngest gets so preoccupied with other things (talking on the phone, You Tube videos, doing her hair, etc) that she'll forget to do stuff. I'm thinking of changing the wifi password and she can get it once I get home and check her work.
Holding my hand worked for me, they both got on my nerves so bad.
I came home with a few one grading period and boy was I punished. No yelling, no screaming just a calm hell. If I picked up the phone it was "Deb let me see what you did in school today"...Head in to watch TV "Deb come here, did you do your book report yet? ...knock on the door, "No, shes getting ready to tell me everything her math teacher talked about today in class"...Going to walk to Highs for a Pepsie "Wait up, Dad will walk with you" "I can go by myself, I always do, I'm old enough." Dad said "Not responsible enough though."
I asked why they were hounding me and the reply was simple. "Well we thought you were responsible enough to know to study, listen in class and know what is expected of you in school and do it. We were wrong, so we will hold your hand and walk you through everyday, like when you were little. When you show us you can handle it yourself, we might let go of your hand again."
Depends on how you define success. Swear to God.
And you can stop that because we both know that the two non-liars were the WORST KIDS EVER!!!!1111!!!!
Very simple.
Kids are not adults. We hope they will be some day, but they're not currently. It's like getting frustrated with your dog because he can't resist digging in the trash - it's just what they do and their impulse control isn't terribly well-developed. It's up to us to put the trash up so the dog can't get to it.
Misfit
Lawful neutral
You don't have to change it; you can set a specific time it goes on and off. If I remember correctly, I did it by typing my I.P. address after the http:// then logging into my router secured site. It let me pick times and days.
getbent
Thats how them b*tch's R
Never knew that. I may check that out. Of course it wouldn't be fair to my oldest who does get her stuff done. Then again, she's afraid of loosing her phone
What kind of a Commie are you, wanting to punish everyone for the sins of one kid??
Misfit
Lawful neutral
Both kids have D's now, they’re conspiring me thinks.
pelers
Active Member
I was a horrible, awful, rotten, no good kid. My parents punished me for anything less than an A. So I, in my pre-teen omniscience, punished them right back by flunking out out of 8th grade. Brilliant on my part, really. I'm sure I taught them a lesson. Point being punishment doesn't always work. I had to pull my head out of my own ass.
WHY is the kiddo getting Ds? I think you really need to look into that before deciding on a course of action. If he's doing his honest best, then perhaps you should look into some tutoring homework help so he can get some one-on-one time to better learn the concepts. Perhaps the teacher just isn't explaining the material in a way that clicks for him. Maybe he's bored and sees it all as an exercise in stupidity because he'll obviously never use the stuff again. In that case some focus on practical applications is handy. Geography is great when you're planning a road trip adventure. Google can only answer the questions you know to ask. English? Written communication is hugely important and people DO see typos, grammar errors and spelling mistakes and they DO judge for it. Spellcheck really can't tell the difference between you and ewe. The books they have you read? They want you to read between the lines, what is the author REALLY saying? This applies to every day interactions, people are rarely completely straightforward and you need to learn to listen critically to figure out all the nuances. Math? It really depends on what he wants to be when he grows up, but the basics are always important. How else are you going to know if somebody rung you up triple for something at the grocery store on accident if you don't have a rough estimate going in your head as to how much your total should be? How are you going to be able to determine if the sale price 4-pack is a better deal than the regularly priced bulk 24-pack?
Just some ideas. :shrug:
WHY is the kiddo getting Ds? I think you really need to look into that before deciding on a course of action. If he's doing his honest best, then perhaps you should look into some tutoring homework help so he can get some one-on-one time to better learn the concepts. Perhaps the teacher just isn't explaining the material in a way that clicks for him. Maybe he's bored and sees it all as an exercise in stupidity because he'll obviously never use the stuff again. In that case some focus on practical applications is handy. Geography is great when you're planning a road trip adventure. Google can only answer the questions you know to ask. English? Written communication is hugely important and people DO see typos, grammar errors and spelling mistakes and they DO judge for it. Spellcheck really can't tell the difference between you and ewe. The books they have you read? They want you to read between the lines, what is the author REALLY saying? This applies to every day interactions, people are rarely completely straightforward and you need to learn to listen critically to figure out all the nuances. Math? It really depends on what he wants to be when he grows up, but the basics are always important. How else are you going to know if somebody rung you up triple for something at the grocery store on accident if you don't have a rough estimate going in your head as to how much your total should be? How are you going to be able to determine if the sale price 4-pack is a better deal than the regularly priced bulk 24-pack?
Just some ideas. :shrug:
You made me look that up - great word!
TGB
New Member
Well Depending on how old they are here is my suggestion
1. Stop by at school unannounced and visit the class he/she have a bad grade
2.Supervised homework time. Watch them do their homework.
3.Assign a chore value for each grade. Other than the chores that they already have. Assign A for zero chores, B and C 2 chores Dand F 4-6 chores. Unpleasant chores such as washing all the windows of the house, scrubbing the inside of the refrigerator, While you don't want to make your child feel like a failure, getting low grades most likely means that he's not doing his best work. An influx of chores might encourage him to try a little harder and get those grades up by the next report card. Extend the consequence to homework and other assignments to drive your point home. Again all depended on childs age.
4. Limit TV and internet surfing to 1 hour per day
6. Ipod, xbox, playstation taken away or on the weekend at your discretion.
1. Stop by at school unannounced and visit the class he/she have a bad grade
2.Supervised homework time. Watch them do their homework.
3.Assign a chore value for each grade. Other than the chores that they already have. Assign A for zero chores, B and C 2 chores Dand F 4-6 chores. Unpleasant chores such as washing all the windows of the house, scrubbing the inside of the refrigerator, While you don't want to make your child feel like a failure, getting low grades most likely means that he's not doing his best work. An influx of chores might encourage him to try a little harder and get those grades up by the next report card. Extend the consequence to homework and other assignments to drive your point home. Again all depended on childs age.
4. Limit TV and internet surfing to 1 hour per day
6. Ipod, xbox, playstation taken away or on the weekend at your discretion.