pebbles
Member
LIKE
Also if they are involved in a team sport, them not being there would hurt the team as well.
Help me think of a good punishment
- Thread starter Misfit
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Also if they are involved in a team sport, them not being there would hurt the team as well.
Misfit
Lawful neutral
We did this Saturday night. It took 3 hours but they seemed to get the point. Time will tell I guess.
acommondisaster
Active Member
Sounds like you gave them a good idea of a destination. But knowing where you want to go doesn't mean you know how to get there. What's the next step?
kom526
They call me ... Sarcasmo
We take things away from the oldest for anything less than a B, bring home a "C"? Forget about it, you'll see daylight after the next interim. I do not check HAC everyday because I cannot afford to keep fuel in the helicopter, but I do ask him everyday when he walks in the door, "homework?" "Some" "Get on it." He has goals (architect) but he wants a $1000 gaming computer first, so he has his school priorities straight.
The last time he got less than a B was 3rd grade, on an interim, and was absolutely sobbing when he had to show it to us.
The last time he got less than a B was 3rd grade, on an interim, and was absolutely sobbing when he had to show it to us.
lucky_bee
RBF expert
My parents would throw me a party any time I came home with more than a C- in Math. For Science, it was anything above a B-.
:shrug: A's on everything else though. They knew my weaknesses and why.
I haven't the faintest idea how to approach this yet (my kids aren't really getting letter grades yet). My oldest, I worry about him constantly, because C's and D's might be the best he will do even with trying very, very hard. My middle girl, I tend to think she will punish HERSELF worse if she doesn't get all A's.
My youngest will probably scold the teacher. Until she changes it.
My youngest will probably scold the teacher. Until she changes it.
I believe you want the punishment to fit the offense, making them do chores (to me) isn't the answer.
What my parents did when I brought home a D; for ever D I brought home, it was an hour of mandatory homework, Monday thru Friday, whether there was school or not. If I brought home 3 D's, that was three hours of homework a night. If I didn't have any homework, my parents would make me research something and write a report, or make me do math problems, spell all 50 states and their capitals, or read a newspaper article and do a report on it.
That puts the onus on the kid, if they don't want to do the hour of homework, work harder on the school work and don't bring home D's.
BTW, F's result in lost privileges like cell phone, X-Box, etc until the next report card; for C's, no reward or punishment, $5 for every B and $10 for A's, straight A's is $50.
So far, my kids have not brought home any D's or F's, of course, we monitor their homework and school work; and have made it clear that we will not accept anything below a B, even though an occasional C it tolerated.
Just a thought, YMMV
What my parents did when I brought home a D; for ever D I brought home, it was an hour of mandatory homework, Monday thru Friday, whether there was school or not. If I brought home 3 D's, that was three hours of homework a night. If I didn't have any homework, my parents would make me research something and write a report, or make me do math problems, spell all 50 states and their capitals, or read a newspaper article and do a report on it.
That puts the onus on the kid, if they don't want to do the hour of homework, work harder on the school work and don't bring home D's.
BTW, F's result in lost privileges like cell phone, X-Box, etc until the next report card; for C's, no reward or punishment, $5 for every B and $10 for A's, straight A's is $50.
So far, my kids have not brought home any D's or F's, of course, we monitor their homework and school work; and have made it clear that we will not accept anything below a B, even though an occasional C it tolerated.
Just a thought, YMMV
KDENISE977
New Member
:like: I'm sure I have no grounds or experience for agreeing with this as my son is only a toddler, but I like this !!
And sometimes that's just the way it is. School performance doesn't always indicate future success, so try not to stress about it too much.
I think it's unfair to expect As and Bs out of a C capable kid. C is average, and we need to keep that in mind. It's not failing. Perhaps their talents lie elsewhere, and those talents are just as important as academics.
acommondisaster
Active Member
My youngest is 24 now. He has never smoked, doesn't drink, has never been in trouble and didn't cause discord at home. He had horrible grades from middle school on. He'd gotten so far behind that he had to take NOVA classes in order to graduate with his class. Nothing seemed to motivate him, except his senior year when his girlfriend moved in with us (she was from NYC) under the condition that he keep his grades up. He still didn't make honor roll but his grades improved. He was just a hard headed kid who didn't see the value of school and thought no one really had anything they could teach him. After graduation, we dragged him kicking and screaming to CSM and signed him up for some classes, telling him we'd only pay for his gf to go to CSM if he went too. He realized "college" wasn't so bad and got pretty good grades. (She went on to get scholarships).
Fast forward 3 years - he's got a low paying job and picks up odd jobs. They own a house, he married his girlfriend (who graduated magna cum laude from a 4 year program debt free). He's been applying for jobs everywhere, trying to move up - he had to supply his high school transcripts recently and he said to me "I can't believe how bad I did in high school. How could I have been such a dum bass?" Indeed.
Fast forward 3 years - he's got a low paying job and picks up odd jobs. They own a house, he married his girlfriend (who graduated magna cum laude from a 4 year program debt free). He's been applying for jobs everywhere, trying to move up - he had to supply his high school transcripts recently and he said to me "I can't believe how bad I did in high school. How could I have been such a dum bass?" Indeed.
MarieB
New Member
I don't understand it, but it also scares me having 2 boys of my own (my oldest declared to me not long ago that he hates reading, etc etc and we had constant battles about homework).
I would have never thought to not do my homework, and the thought of getting bad grades was mortifying to me. It's just hard to relate and will be hard for me to deal with if it happens with my kids.
I would have never thought to not do my homework, and the thought of getting bad grades was mortifying to me. It's just hard to relate and will be hard for me to deal with if it happens with my kids.
acommondisaster
Active Member
I agree! Sometimes I wonder if it's the sticker mentality that fostered this ambivalence. Everyone gets a sticker regardless of effort of lack of it, there are no winners or losers, everyone's a unique snowflake, etc. Why bother trying?
OTH, I guess if someone hates reading, they don't need a cellphone with texting capabilities, right?