Home Alone In Filth

[Suz]

Help me decide what to do please!

I know someone who bought and moved into a house in Essex south (?) (behind burger king) in January. THE HOUSE IS A PIGSTY! Why you ask? Because she is a drunk, and is too lazy (or stupid) to clean it. Her husband works all day, and she spends all day at a bar. She is known to be standing outside waiting for it to open (!) @ 7:30 am!!

Now I could care less about her lack of cleanliness... (with her home or herself because she is one GROSS individual)

Now my real beef is this
They have a 10 yr old son. He is a sweet boy. They leave him home all day ALONE! Isn't that against some law??? I am so pissed I can't see straight.

I want to report them to social services. Hubby says MYOB-thinking it will only come back to bite us in the arse.

What would you do? Keep quiet or speak up?

 

[Sharon]

Originally posted by Suz'
Hubby says MYOB

 

[Hot N Bothered]

Originally posted by Suz'
They have a 10 yr old son. He is a sweet boy. They leave him home all day ALONE! Isn't that against some law???

Nope.

 

[HollowSoul]

i could be wrong but i think the cut off age is 9

 

[Dupontster]

In all reality, there probably isn't anything you can do....Just hope and pray the father will see what is going on and get the kid out of that situation....The worst thing about it all is that sweet 10 year old kid will probably be in some kind of trouble by the time he is a teenager.....If you said anything to the so-called mother, she would tell you the same thing your hubby told you....MYOB....I know it is hard and it is tearing your heart out, but what the hell can you do...How do you know he is a sweet kid....Is he a friend of your kids? If so, just hope your kids upbringing and example will rub off on him.....It's a sad story....

 

[mAlice]

I think the child must be 13 to be left alone. I would contact the authorities. It needs to be somebody's business.

 

[Suz]

Originally posted by Dupontster
In all reality, there probably isn't anything you can do....Just hope and pray the father will see what is going on and get the kid out of that situation....The worst thing about it all is that sweet 10 year old kid will probably be in some kind of trouble by the time he is a teenager.....If you said anything to the so-called mother, she would tell you the same thing your hubby told you....MYOB....I know it is hard and it is tearing your heart out, but what the hell can you do...How do you know he is a sweet kid....Is he a friend of your kids? If so, just hope your kids upbringing and example will rub off on him.....It's a sad story....

I have only been around the boy a few times, but my other friends have seen him and the situation up close more. My boys are 17 so, no, they don't know him. Both the mother and father are regulars at our watering hole. She just spends 15 or more hours a day there EVERY day, while he goes in after work and all day Sat & Sun's. When I said filth I meant it. Cat poop all over, forget even finding the kitchen counters for all the garbage (take out food trash) on them. I don't care for either parent. The mother is a drunk and the father a enabler. The child is what concerns me.

 

[mAlice]

Suz, check your pm's

 

[Suz]

Originally posted by mAlice
Suz, check your pm's

Done. tks!

 

[meme]

Suz'....

First of all your a very kind person to even want to get involved. There are alot of people out there that would like to just overlook situations like this.

If I were in your place...I would definitely report it to the proper authorities (Social Services.) You don't have to give your name (at least that is from my understanding) and you can just tell them that you are very concerned for this little boy and you would like to know if someone could and would look into it.

Best of luck!!!!

 

[Hot N Bothered]

You can call Child Protective Services, but there has to be more than the kid being alone. The law says they may be left alone at age 8. They have to be 13 to babysit.

The house being a disaster... well there's a fine line between being a bad housekeeper and creating a dangerous and unhealthy situation for the child. :shrug:

If it is really working your conscience, call CPS. The worst that can happen is they say it doesn't seem to fall within the rules requiring an investigation. But they will make a note of it and if something else comes up they have a record.

 

[Toxick]

Get your facts straight first...

If you know for a fact this child is living in filth, then I'd say call Social Services. I'm a stickler for minding my own business, but children should not be forced to live in unfit conditions. 10 is old enough to be left home alone, but nobody should have to live in a house that's unsanitary or downright disgusting.

That alone will warrent an investigation.

It should be noted that DCFS guarantees anonymity if you decide to call them. So you don't have to worry about a confrontation if it comes to that.



If, however, you call them up and it turns out that it was nothing, or you overreacted or made a bogus claim, they will put your name on a little list which flags you as an unreliable source. You won't get into any trouble (that I know about), but they will ignore any future tips you might give them.

 

[vraiblonde]

Originally posted by Suz'
I want to report them to social services.

And what do you think will happen if you do? SS will come out and do a check (maybe). Then they may or may not find anything of concern. If they do, they'll chastise the parents, who will ignore them. There's a long shot that SS may actually find something worthy of their attention. Then they'll take the kid out of the home and he'll get to spend some time being shuffled around to abusive foster homes before some judge gives him back to his parents.

I understand your frustration - believe me - but there's really nothing you can do.

 

[Kain99]

As sick as it is... The leave alone age in the county is 8 years old. You must be 13 to watch other children in the home.

I feel your fury and wish that CPS cared about filthy homes but they don't.

If you want action, watch for bruises etc... It can't hurt to file a complaint just to start the paper trail but don't expect results.

 

[vraiblonde]

Originally posted by Kain99
I feel your fury and wish that CPS cared about filthy homes but they don't.

It's not that they don't care - it's that there's nothing they can do. Larry's step-mom was a DC social worker for over 10 years and she has stories that would make you weep. And she's had to escort young children back to the most horrific conditions. The workers themselves care, unless they've become desensitized to it. It's the system that doesn't work. And ultimately, it's the bad people having children that don't work.

 

[Tonio]

Originally posted by Kain99
I feel your fury and wish that CPS cared about filthy homes but they don't.

My wife didn't work for CPS but for another department in Social Services, and she can tell you stories about home filth.

One of her co-workers over in CPS used to complain about her field getting a bad reputation. Not for not doing enough to protect kids, she said, but for allegedly taking people's kids away for no reason.

 

[aps45819]

If you see her behind the wheel of a car, call 911. If someone was drinking all night, odds are they have a high enough BAC to get busted. Might be the wake-up they need to realize they're destroying their life and the the well-being of their family.

 

[aps45819]

Originally posted by appyday
APS thanks for waving back to me at the Leon carnaval

Didn't see you, I was keeping an eye glued to the 5 yr old lad with me. He has a tendency to get distracted and wander off.

 

[aps45819]

Originally posted by appyday
We passed in the parking lot..in the alley...lol...I know it was you but I was kinda gun shy as I walked up to this huge black guy and stuck my fingers in his ribs..

I'm whiter than most white folks. Never had a tan only get sunburns.

 

[sifl]

Originally posted by Suz'
Help me decide what to do please!

I know someone who bought and moved into a house in Essex south (?) (behind burger king) in January. THE HOUSE IS A PIGSTY! Why you ask? Because she is a drunk, and is too lazy (or stupid) to clean it. Her husband works all day, and she spends all day at a bar. She is known to be standing outside waiting for it to open (!) @ 7:30 am!!

Now I could care less about her lack of cleanliness... (with her home or herself because she is one GROSS individual)

Now my real beef is this
They have a 10 yr old son. He is a sweet boy. They leave him home all day ALONE! Isn't that against some law??? I am so pissed I can't see straight.

I want to report them to social services. Hubby says MYOB-thinking it will only come back to bite us in the arse.

What would you do? Keep quiet or speak up?

You should volunteer to babysit.