BOP
Well-Known Member
I don't know about men, but women almost never mention another relationship.
I’m Cheating on My Deployed Boyfriend
- Thread starter Misfit
- Start date
I don't know about men, but women almost never mention another relationship.
SoMD_Fun_Guy
Do you like apples?
Toxick
Splat
This is a good point, and I'd like to elaborate on my earlier post where I referred to her as an ignorant whore.
Most of my ire toward this flea-ridden #### has little to do with the actual cheating, although that's kind of sickening in its own right. Girlfriend or not, she wrote her story speaking as if they were in - at the least - a quasi-committed relationship, even if there were no vows spoken or whatever.
She then goes on to say that she pretty much fell over with her legs in the air the first time some dude waggles his pickle at her. Ok, whatever. We all have our vices, I'm not so much judging her for that, although I disapprove of her technique.
But what twists my nipples is that she writes something like, "Oh, I'm so against cheating".
##### please. That's not only an insult to the guy who thinks you're his faithful girlfriend, but an insult to the intelligence of anyone who reads her sob story. Go sing that happy horse#### somewhere else. In the words of Judge Judy, "Don't piss on my leg and tell me it's raining." If you were so against it, you wouldn't have done it. *I* am against cheating, so you know what - I don't cheat.
I sympathize with being horny.
I do not sympathize with being a lying scumbag.
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twinoaks207
Having Fun!
Oh, honey, I think you need a couple of
. Good luck to you as you're going to have to do a lot of delicate untangling when this guy gets home if you want to save that friendship. Sending you a few prayers of support, too!
Railroad
Routinely Derailed
I remember that when I was deployed to the Persian Gulf in 1983-84, and again when I was deployed to the North Atlantic with NATO in 1985-86, it was very important to be able to think in terms of stability with regard to "home." Maybe every deployer feels like that to some extent, but I can only speak for myself. During the Persian Gulf deployment, my wife decided to spend some time at her mother's place. At the same time, she stopped replying to letters on a regular basis. I was freaking out.
It wasn't wise of me to put so much dependence on her, and it would have been even more wrong to do so with a girlfriend. In a very real sense she was as deployed and stressed-out as I was, and I unwittingly put her in that position.
The separation test that a deployment represents is more difficult for people in their twenties and younger than it is for those in later years. I don't think that everyone can remain "faithful" through those things, especially when the deployments are a year or more (mine were six months).
The weakness caused by loneliness and normal physical desires is hard, very hard to deal with, and it affects both the one at home and the one overseas. That doesn't make it right when the mistakes happen for some, but it sure does make it understandable (maybe more so for those not in the situation than those in it). For people who've never been in that situation, I'm not sure if it's possible to know what it's like.
In any case, I guess my point is that we shouldn't be too judgmental about this situation. Things like this have a way of generating more than enough misery for all concerned all by themselves.
It wasn't wise of me to put so much dependence on her, and it would have been even more wrong to do so with a girlfriend. In a very real sense she was as deployed and stressed-out as I was, and I unwittingly put her in that position.
The separation test that a deployment represents is more difficult for people in their twenties and younger than it is for those in later years. I don't think that everyone can remain "faithful" through those things, especially when the deployments are a year or more (mine were six months).
The weakness caused by loneliness and normal physical desires is hard, very hard to deal with, and it affects both the one at home and the one overseas. That doesn't make it right when the mistakes happen for some, but it sure does make it understandable (maybe more so for those not in the situation than those in it). For people who've never been in that situation, I'm not sure if it's possible to know what it's like.
In any case, I guess my point is that we shouldn't be too judgmental about this situation. Things like this have a way of generating more than enough misery for all concerned all by themselves.
mamatutu
mama to two
I deployed all over the globe from 1981-2003. Started in my twenties, military service is a young persons game. Still have the same woman in my life. was there opportunity for cheating, sure. But neither one of us did. A commitment, whether personal or contractual involves both parties sticking to the terms. Society today has opened a lot of loopholes around personal commitments.
From the OP's original comments, the guy deployed will fare much better when he jettisons this load. Hopefully, he isn't sending the dumb ##### money, saw that too many times too.
Railroad
Routinely Derailed
I agree they probably need to split, because she at least isn't cut out for military spouse duty. I wouldn't call her a dumb #####, though, because she made some mistakes. People need to be understood and afforded the opportunity to learn from their mistakes and change. I know, this seems surprisingly liberal coming from a right-wing extremist and conservative Christian, but it's the example Christ set with an adulteress who was about to be executed for her unfaithfulness. Both her and the guys in her life (including the deployed one) need positive influence and understanding.
Severa
Common sense ain't common
My husband was in the Navy for 6 yrs. Speaking as a military spouse, I saw his shipmates as extended family. I worried about them all, not just my husband. When they hurt, I hurt. Case in point: After one lengthy deployment, one of his shipmates discovered that his girl was cheating on him. Among the evidence was a recently used condom under the bed. Yeah, I'll admit - I wanted to beat her ass. B**ches like that girl and the one referenced in the OP give all military girlfriends/spouses a bad name and in my eyes, deserve EVERY ounce of scorn and disrespect they have coming to them.
LuckyMe143
New Member
I loved being a military wife. When the Mr. came home from deployments it was like falling in love all over again. Some people can handle military and some can't. She's a dumb####!
Actually, 5.56 bullets leave the muzzle at 3200 fps.
acommondisaster
Active Member
I think she should tell him now. How pizzed is he going to be when he comes home and finds she's been lying to him all through the deployment? Why lie to him and have him build up this reunion in his mind to come home to find out she's been feeding him a big fat slutolicious lie for months?
Some people just don't like themselves enough to be able to handle a separation. They have to "be" with someone or they feel worthless. Eventually, she was going to cheat on him because even if she *thinks* she's not the cheating kind, she's just proved that she is exactly that. Glad it happened before they were married with a baby or two.
Some people just don't like themselves enough to be able to handle a separation. They have to "be" with someone or they feel worthless. Eventually, she was going to cheat on him because even if she *thinks* she's not the cheating kind, she's just proved that she is exactly that. Glad it happened before they were married with a baby or two.
E
EmptyTimCup
Guest
This:
to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
IMHO this breakdown is symptomatic of people getting married WAY to FAST .........
but really ; for BETTER of for WORSE ...... Richer or POOR ...... Sickness and in Health
not until you are bored and want something new ..........
if you get involved with someone in the Military, you should know what to expect ....... and do not marry someone expecting to Change them
to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
IMHO this breakdown is symptomatic of people getting married WAY to FAST .........
but really ; for BETTER of for WORSE ...... Richer or POOR ...... Sickness and in Health
not until you are bored and want something new ..........
if you get involved with someone in the Military, you should know what to expect ....... and do not marry someone expecting to Change them
she's cheating on her boyfriend.