I need your opinion

J

juicylove

Guest
This is my first time here. Here it goes...I’ve been with this guy for a very long time. We met when I was very young. When we first met it was great we both smoked you know what and it was fun. I finally grow up...him on the other hand; he has just got worse and worse. He has become a liar, drug addict and domestically violent. He has done some really bad things to me. I also have two kids with him. What are the chances the someone like this will straighten up their life? I pretty much know after some many times of going through this it will probably not work...has anyone been in this kind of relationship before? If so what did you do? Please any advice is appreciated.:shrug:
 
LesterGreen

LesterGreen

New Member
juicylove said:
This is my first time here. Here it goes...I’ve been with this guy for a very long time. We met when I was very young. When we first met it was great we both smoked you know what and it was fun. I finally grow up...him on the other hand; he has just got worse and worse. He has become a liar, drug addict and domestically violent. He has done some really bad things to me. I also have two kids with him. What are the chances the someone like this will straighten up their life? I pretty much know after some many times of going through this it will probably not work...has anyone been in this kind of relationship before? If so what did you do? Please any advice is appreciated.:shrug:
Click to expand...

As soon as he lays a hand on you, it is time to go. He is not a man if he is doing that. Do what is best for your kids and for yourself and leave immediately! Do you have somewhere you can go?
 
Lilypad

Lilypad

Well-Known Member
I just

don't get it-you have 2 children w/this guy who is a liar, drug addict and is domestically violent? And you're asking the question what should you do???
You need to GET OUT NOW!
He can not turn his life around fast enough, you need to protect yourself and those children.
LEAVE.
Don't make excuses and don't give it another try.
GET OUT!
Is this the life you envisioned for yourself and your children?
Is this the home or family life you want your children raised in?
You're lucky social services hasn't been called.
GET OUT NOW!
Do not look back-what will be will be-only he (obviously you're not married) can help himself, you can't fix him or make him change.
PLEASE GET OUT!
 
latinamomma

latinamomma

Transam's wife
juicylove said:
This is my first time here. Here it goes...I’ve been with this guy for a very long time. We met when I was very young. When we first met it was great we both smoked you know what and it was fun. I finally grow up...him on the other hand; he has just got worse and worse. He has become a liar, drug addict and domestically violent. He has done some really bad things to me. I also have two kids with him. What are the chances the someone like this will straighten up their life? I pretty much know after some many times of going through this it will probably not work...has anyone been in this kind of relationship before? If so what did you do? Please any advice is appreciated.:shrug:
Click to expand...
Well, let me say that this story sounds like mine from 17 years ago. I feel your pain. What you need to do is leave. If you can not afford to leave right now, see if a family member or friend will allow you to stay until you can get on your feet again. Hon, this man will not change...he will continue to hurt you or anyone else in the house. He needs real help and the only way that he can get it is to want it for himself. I know there are help lines that you can call, you can file for a protective order against him and he will have to pay you so much a month for the kids and will have to stay away from you. Hon, you need to get out as soon as possible...not just for your safety, but the children's as well. I hope the best for you.:huggy:
 
vraiblonde

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
juicylove said:
What are the chances the someone like this will straighten up their life?
Click to expand...

Zero.

Do you have a daughter? Are you comfortable with your daughter holding this man as her male role-model and marrying a guy just like him?

Do you have a son? Are you comfortable with your son growing up to be just like Daddy?

You know what you need to do and if you don't do it, you suck and have no one to blame but yourself when your children repeat the pattern of abuse you are teaching them.
 
Larry Gude

Larry Gude

Strung Out
I often...

...feel like the forums are a lions den where, if we simply wait long enough, some three legged 2 month old guzzle with bad eyesight and a bottle of A1 will hobble in and ask 'what's for dinner'?
 
onebdzee

onebdzee

off the shelf
vraiblonde said:
Zero.

Do you have a daughter? Are you comfortable with your daughter holding this man as her male role-model and marrying a guy just like him?

Do you have a son? Are you comfortable with your son growing up to be just like Daddy?

You know what you need to do and if you don't do it, you suck and have no one to blame but yourself when your children repeat the pattern of abuse you are teaching them.
Click to expand...

She won't have to worry about all this....the foster/adoptive parents that raise her kids after he either hurts her bad enough to make it impossible for her to raise her kids or kills her, will make sure that they aren't going to follow in their parents footsteps
 
whome20603

whome20603

...
juicylove said:
This is my first time here. Here it goes...I’ve been with this guy for a very long time. We met when I was very young. When we first met it was great we both smoked you know what and it was fun. I finally grow up...him on the other hand; he has just got worse and worse. He has become a liar, drug addict and domestically violent. He has done some really bad things to me. I also have two kids with him. What are the chances the someone like this will straighten up their life? I pretty much know after some many times of going through this it will probably not work...has anyone been in this kind of relationship before? If so what did you do? Please any advice is appreciated.:shrug:
Click to expand...

I hate when people answer a question with a question...BUT...what would you tell your daughter she should do??? Is this how you want to raise your son to act???


Good luck :huggy:
 
vraiblonde

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
Larry Gude said:
...feel like the forums are a lions den where, if we simply wait long enough, some three legged 2 month old guzzle with bad eyesight and a bottle of A1 will hobble in and ask 'what's for dinner'?
Click to expand...

And I feel like the forums are a place where women who didn't receive proper parenting come in here asking, "Will you be my Mommy? How about you? Anyone? I could sure use a Mommy.....not that I'm going to pay any attention to what you say because I'm a big girl and do what I want."

PS, what's a guzzle?
 
Chain729

Chain729

CageKicker Extraordinaire
onebdzee said:
She won't have to worry about all this....the foster/adoptive parents that raise her kids after he either hurts her bad enough to make it impossible for her to raise her kids or kills her, will make sure that they aren't going to follow in their parents footsteps
Click to expand...

Oh come on now, not every abusive spouse (male and female) causes permanent physical injury. Some beat there mates for decades without killing 'em. :duh:

:lol:

juicylove said:
This is my first time here. Here it goes...I’ve been with this guy for a very long time. We met when I was very young. When we first met it was great we both smoked you know what and it was fun. I finally grow up...him on the other hand; he has just got worse and worse. He has become a liar, drug addict and domestically violent. He has done some really bad things to me. I also have two kids with him. What are the chances the someone like this will straighten up their life? I pretty much know after some many times of going through this it will probably not work...has anyone been in this kind of relationship before? If so what did you do? Please any advice is appreciated.:shrug:
Click to expand...

My advice depends on the following: H/B/K? Cute?

Honestly, if you have to ask, you aren't good for much else.
 
Larry Gude

Larry Gude

Strung Out
It's...

vraiblonde said:
And I feel like the forums are a place where women who didn't receive proper parenting come in here asking, "Will you be my Mommy? How about you? Anyone? I could sure use a Mommy.....not that I'm going to pay any attention to what you say because I'm a big girl and do what I want."

PS, what's a guzzle?
Click to expand...

...a person who goes to a party and, the next day, swears off whatever it is they happened to have drank too much of.

:lmao:
 
aps45819

aps45819

24/7 Single Dad
juicylove said:
What are the chances the someone like this will straighten up their life?
Click to expand...

He doesn't have a problem, you do.
He has booze, drugs, sex, food, and a place to sleep. That doesn't seem like he has any problems.

What incentive does he have to change?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top