This next story is literally unbelievable but I promise I’m not making this up. Apparently feeling empty because people aren’t as terrified of covid as they used to be, the City of New York ran a completely bonkers public service announcement yesterday on HOW TO SURVIVE A NUCLEAR ATTACK.
The PSA is about a minute long and offers helpful tips like, hey, get inside, close those windows, brush off all the radioactive debris, and, I’m not making this up, check for updates online. Because the internet will still be working or something.
Apart from its utter uselessness, I have a few other quibbles with the advice. What about masks?? Are you telling me that after all this, they missed the low-hanging fruit of telling people to wear their covid masks to filter out radioactive dust and stuff? Come on, New York, think!
The funniest part is how it ends. “You’ve got this!”, the chipper spokeslady promises. Nuclear bombs, meh! Give us sixty seconds and you’ll be all good when the nuclear holocaust comes.
I know it’s tempting to fret that hey, Joe Biden is stirring up all the nuclear powers against us like he’s doing it ON PURPOSE. And the Russians and Chinese appear to be massing right below our wide-open southern border, like they’re getting ready to invade after softening us up with some strategic first strikes. Can we even trust Biden to remember where he put the nuclear codes? He can’t even sit on a stationary bicycle.
But don’t take the bait! Despite all the news of wars and rumors of wars, we’re not even CLOSE to what we went through last millennium.
Here’s a pic from a 1960’s nuclear public service announcement, back when we REALLY knew how to make it through the bomb. I vaguely remember doing some of these drills in the 1970’s when I was in grade school, and watching grainy propaganda films about post-strike survival tactics. New York City is an amateur. They even forgot to tell people not to look right at the blast because it will fry your retina and then you’ll be blindly groping around the apocalypse.
According to The Washington Times
, “by 1960, nearly 70 percent of American adults thought that nuclear war was imminent. By 1965, an estimated 200,000 shelters were built—but that’s just an estimate. It’s hard to know exactly, because people didn’t talk.”
We’re still far from that point.
And people have been quietly building bunkers ever since. It never stopped. The thing is, if you HAVE a bunker, you don’t want anybody else to know about it. You can’t accommodate pop-ins or guests. There’s even one company in Europe that can quietly install a nuclear bunker in your backyard in under 45 days from ordering: https://nuclearbunkercompany.com
So, PLEASE don’t fall for all this fear porn. True, we had a nice reprieve for a few decades — not from the reality of nuclear war but the constant fear porn about it. Now NYC is either trying to bring nuclear fearmongering back, for some reason, with its sixty seconds of tepid suggestions lacking any practical value, or they’re just trying to normalize the notion of imminent nuclear war again because fightin’ Joe Biden is bringing us to the brink.
Either way it’s nonsense. I should say, MORE nonsense.
Electoral doomsday for dems; an nuclear-level fear-porn PSA in NYC; cracks in the Ukraine alliance; judge orders discovery into federal Twitter meddling; New Zealand covid numbers; and much more...