Pros and cons

afjess1989

Amount of F##Ks given, 0
Of having kids.

A lot of the girls I went to high school with had kids in school or they are working on their litter now. I kinda feel like left out now because they all have their baby click and I'm over here with a beer in a bar lmao lol so what are some pros and cons to having kids? I've been using BC and not having money as a good plan not to have kids. Lol


*i have a job just have bills incase someone is like why don't you have money*
 
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vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
PRO: Babies are sweet and if you do it right and don't kill them when they're teenagers you'll have some pretty decent adults that you can say you made.

CON: Labor and delivery is the most trivial pain your children will cause you.
 

Larry Gude

Strung Out
Of having kids.

What else will you do that will, really, truly matter?

Be a good neighbor? Take care of your folks when they are old? Invent a better mousetrap? Have lots of fun?

I've had this conversation with my Big Gay Little Brother, what he thinks about not leaving children and he could not care less. Has ZERO interest.

I am not, by any means, the worlds greatest dad. That said, man, if I didn't have kids, I could slip into "I don't give a ####" real, real easy.

As far as I am concerned, having kids is the only reason we are here that, when you really think about it, means a gohtdamn thing.

:buddies:
 

kom526

They call me ... Sarcasmo
My LW and I waited 6 years before we had our 1st. I was 32 and she was 30, only you know what is best for you.
 

KDENISE977

New Member
Of having kids.

A lot of the girls I went to high school with had kids in school or they are working on their litter now. I kinda feel like left out now because they all have their baby click and I'm over here with a beer in a bar lmao lol so what are some pros and cons to having kids? I've been using BC and not having money as a good plan not to have kids. Lol

*i have a job just have bills incase someone is like why don't you have money*

Borrow my 2 year old for a few hours. You won't find a more effective method of birth control. YW
 

afjess1989

Amount of F##Ks given, 0
Me and man friend have brought this up. I Definitely want to wait until I'm a little older and have some money saved up. That. Terrifies me more than anything is not having the money to take care of my child. I do not want to be like one of those people that are on welfare programs.
 
Me and man friend have brought this up. I Definitely want to wait until I'm a little older and have some money saved up. That. Terrifies me more than anything is not having the money to take care of my child. I do not want to be like one of those people that are on welfare programs.
It would help if you give your child a dedicted father too so be choosy about your sperm donor...:baby:
 

ZARA

Registered User
Of having kids.

A lot of the girls I went to high school with had kids in school or they are working on their litter now. I kinda feel like left out now because they all have their baby click and I'm over here with a beer in a bar lmao lol so what are some pros and cons to having kids? I've been using BC and not having money as a good plan not to have kids. Lol


*i have a job just have bills incase someone is like why don't you have money*

Most importantly, above all else, You should go do ALL the little things you have on your "wish list" and get the partying out of your system now.

I Love My Son. He is the Greatest Gift and Blessing.

My life dreams changed the day I became pregnent. All the things I wanted to do was put on hold. Everything on my wishlist disappeared like magical ink.

Becoming a Mom changed me in ways I can't explain. I no longer lived my life. I lived my life for my son's happiness and well being.

It's a great feeling and nothing will ever touch the memory of the first time I truly "Fell in love" with my son. But there will always be a very tiny miniscule part of me that still wonders about all the things (adventures) I could have had/done if I hadn't become Mom. So from beginning to end, I have made sure my son has lived the life I always dreamed of as a kid. I live vicariously through him and surprisingly, it is emotionally fulfilling for me but I would not advise it for everyone.
 
I agree in thinking you should wait until you're ready. Make sure you do what you want to now, before you have children. Picking up and just going is harder, vacations are 'different'. That said, there's no 'perfect' time financially and there will always be things you want to do or things you'll look back and wish you'd done. I don't know, I was 30 when I had my son and will be 31 when I have our daughter in September and feel I've experienced life without my lil one pretty well. Thing is, having a baby changes your whole life in a way you really can't explain. You think you've loved now?? Wait until you have a baby. The feeling is unexplainable...the love you have is.......wow, there aren't words. I have a friend who talks about being unsure, though she laughs it off so I know she wants children, and I'll tell her "you have no idea how much your mother loves you".....I mean that ❤
 
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"We are sitting at lunch one day when my daughter casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family." "We're taking a survey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my daughter, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes.

I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her.

That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mom!" will cause her to drop a soufflé or her best crystal without a moments hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my daughter to know that every day decisions will no longer be routine. That a five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive daughter, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself.

That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give herself up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs.

I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor.

My daughter's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks.

I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child.

I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I wish my daughter could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving.

I want to describe to my daughter the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike.

I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time.

I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My daughter's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the table, squeezed my daughter's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings.

Please share this with a Mom that you know or all of your girlfriends who may someday be Moms. May you always have in your arms the one who is in your heart."

-Author Unknown
 

kom526

They call me ... Sarcasmo
We did get a dog before we had our first. We wanted to see if the dog would live.
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

Thank you, Kris. I'd never read that before but it's nice to know someone besides me was a neurotic who took her job as parent very seriously.

Any pain a woman has ever felt is nothing compared to the agony she feels when her child hurts. You will never be so in control and terrified at the same time. So intelligent and so insecure. So wise and so stupid. The epiphany is when your daughter becomes a beautiful teenage pre-woman, and you pass the torch. When your son becomes a man.

My daughter is 26 and my son 30, and they are so much more on the ball than I was at that age, and I seriously pat myself on the back because I know I gave that to them. Like Larry said, there is nothing you will ever do in your life that is as important as successfully raising the next generation. But it's painful and a job, and I don't blame women who choose not to do it one little bit.
 
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