Or "demands" might be more appropriate.
Most of us managed to get our kids from infancy to adulthood without killing them, right?
So here's a story about my daughter, which isn't all that, but the idea is to discuss grandparents vs. parents and when we Dodie types get to wave Mommy away and enjoy our grandchildren.
When I was visiting my daughter and her family, which includes 6 month old Riggs (aka CUTEST BABY EVER!), she put him down for night-night and he was fussing a bit. So I picked him up and headed for the rocking chair. She stopped me and said, "Oh no - we don't rock him."
WTH?? I said he was too young to bawl himself to sleep like that, and he needed some soothing to settle him in. She said the pediatrician and all her crazy Mommy books say not to rock them because it makes them spoiled and then they'll never learn to sleep on their own.
I replied that I rocked her and her brother most nights until they were around 8 or 9 months old, and they learned to sleep on their own just fine. And what the hell's the point of having a baby if you can't rock them???
She said, "BLAH!"
I retorted, "BLAH"
Anyway, it ended with me saying that this is my grandson and I'll rock him if I want and there's not a damn thing she can do about it.
This was not a fight, but more of a discussion - nobody was angry. Bebe Daddy stayed out of it because he and she have already had this conversation, with him being pro-rocking and thinking her ped and the books are nutty. (I didn't know this until after I put my foot down.)
After seeing that rocking is so much more pleasant that listening to a crying baby getting all worked up, she's taken to giving him a few minutes of bonding before bedtime.
Anyway, the point is - where do you draw the line? When do you abide by Mommy and Dad's rules, and when do you tell them to beat it and let you tend your grandchild?
BTW, this was prompted by the Great Cereal Debate where someone's MIL gave the baby rice cereal against the express wishes of the Hyper-Mommy.
Most of us managed to get our kids from infancy to adulthood without killing them, right?
So here's a story about my daughter, which isn't all that, but the idea is to discuss grandparents vs. parents and when we Dodie types get to wave Mommy away and enjoy our grandchildren.
When I was visiting my daughter and her family, which includes 6 month old Riggs (aka CUTEST BABY EVER!), she put him down for night-night and he was fussing a bit. So I picked him up and headed for the rocking chair. She stopped me and said, "Oh no - we don't rock him."
WTH?? I said he was too young to bawl himself to sleep like that, and he needed some soothing to settle him in. She said the pediatrician and all her crazy Mommy books say not to rock them because it makes them spoiled and then they'll never learn to sleep on their own.
I replied that I rocked her and her brother most nights until they were around 8 or 9 months old, and they learned to sleep on their own just fine. And what the hell's the point of having a baby if you can't rock them???
She said, "BLAH!"
I retorted, "BLAH"
Anyway, it ended with me saying that this is my grandson and I'll rock him if I want and there's not a damn thing she can do about it.
This was not a fight, but more of a discussion - nobody was angry. Bebe Daddy stayed out of it because he and she have already had this conversation, with him being pro-rocking and thinking her ped and the books are nutty. (I didn't know this until after I put my foot down.)
After seeing that rocking is so much more pleasant that listening to a crying baby getting all worked up, she's taken to giving him a few minutes of bonding before bedtime.
Anyway, the point is - where do you draw the line? When do you abide by Mommy and Dad's rules, and when do you tell them to beat it and let you tend your grandchild?
BTW, this was prompted by the Great Cereal Debate where someone's MIL gave the baby rice cereal against the express wishes of the Hyper-Mommy.
). :shrug: If the grandparents are in a situation where they babysit frequently, or see the kids frequently, then they should listen to the requests of the parents when it comes to the major things. :shrug: I don't see anything wrong with grandparents having a discussion about something or suggesting new things to the parents though.
What does she think happened in during the baby's time in the womb??? There was lots of rocking! How the hell does one spoil a newborn? I'm not a fan of the Ferber method (letting them cry it out) it solves nothing.
I'm sorry you did that much crying.
