Since you been gone I can do whatever I want...

itsbob

itsbob

I bowl overhand
shiki said:
how so?
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Easy. Face the facts, it's over (if it's over) and sit down like adults and figure out how to end the marriage (not necessarliy the relationship, and definitely NOT the family).

Kids don't have to be meted out or handled like a commodity, and depending on the ages of the kids, maybe they can play a role. You don't HAVE to have a set visitation, and they should never be used as bargaining chips or a way to seek revenge or retribution.

Go visit the master Divorce hearings.. From what I saw MOST end up amicably, with no lawyers involved. The ones that have lawyers involved are funny as hell, and some things they argue over as to who's possessions are who's (whose?) are pretty damn funny. Most go in front of the Master with everything worked out, Master decides on what child support is.. and bam.. done! No yelling, no screaming.. Judge doesn't tell you you HAVE to sell your house, or anything else for that matter.

Get lawyers involved then it gets messy and you get to the point of having judges tell you to sell off assets, and homes.. etc.. etc..
 
S

shiki

Guest
Chain729 said:
suck? yes. Devastating? Doesn't have to be. I'm from a divorced family. The problem wasn't the divorce. The problem was that my parents were so involved in their emotional "woe is me" crap that they stopped being parents all together.
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well I guess you're just stronger than most. good for you. :thisisSPARTA:
 
S

shiki

Guest
itsbob said:
Easy. Face the facts, it's over (if it's over) and sit down like adults and figure out how to end the marriage (not necessarliy the relationship, and definitely NOT the family).

Kids don't have to be meted out or handled like a commodity, and depending on the ages of the kids, maybe they can play a role. You don't HAVE to have a set visitation, and they should never be used as bargaining chips or a way to seek revenge or retribution.

Go visit the master Divorce hearings.. From what I saw MOST end up amicably, with no lawyers involved. The ones that have lawyers involved are funny as hell, and some things they argue over as to who's possessions are who's (whose?) are pretty damn funny. Most go in front of the Master with everything worked out, Master decides on what child support is.. and bam.. done! No yelling, no screaming.. Judge doesn't tell you you HAVE to sell your house, or anything else for that matter.

Get lawyers involved then it gets messy and you get to the point of having judges tell you to sell off assets, and homes.. etc.. etc..
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The mechanics don't have to be devastating or brutal, but the death of the family is. But that's just how I feel.


We have already done mediation and come to an agreement as far as child custody. We are working together...but the fact remains that the family right now is in upheaval and it hurts. Divorce doesn't even approach the table for 2 years yet.
 
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baydoll

baydoll

New Member
shiki said:
well I guess you're just stronger than most. good for you. :thisisSPARTA:
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Yes, I agree. Easier said than done.

Chain, good advice and all but unless you yourself actually go through the heartbreaking experience of finding out your wife no longer loves you nor wants to be with you anymore then your advice falls flat.
 
baydoll

baydoll

New Member
shiki said:
The mechanics don't have to be devastating or brutal, but the death of the family is. But that's just how I feel.
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And that's EXACTLY what it is! You are GRIEVING right now, Shiki. And that is normal and to be expected.
 
Chain729

Chain729

CageKicker Extraordinaire
baydoll said:
Yes, I agree. Easier said than done.

Chain, good advice and all but unless you yourself actually go through the heartbreaking experience of finding out your wife no longer loves you nor wants to be with you anymore then your advice falls flat.
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Don't be an idiot. Who the words come from does not determine the worth of the words themselves. A great philosophy is a great philosophy whether it came from Buddah or the homeless bum on the corner.

And if you paid attention, someone walking up and saying "I don't love you anymore" is a cake walk compared to what I've been through. I wish things had been that easy.
 
baydoll

baydoll

New Member
Chain729 said:
Don't be an idiot. Who the words come from does not determine the worth of the words themselves. A great philosophy is a great philosophy whether it came from Buddah or the homeless bum on the corner.

And if you paid attention, someone walking up and saying "I don't love you anymore" is a cake walk compared to what I've been through. I wish things had been that easy.
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Chain, are you married?
 
Chain729

Chain729

CageKicker Extraordinaire
baydoll said:
Chain, are you married?
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marriage is nothing more than legal binding these days. Even when it wasn't, the ceremony didn't change the emotion, did it? When you have courts tell the police to kindly remove someone from your residence, come to talk to me. Until then, don't try to go there.
 
baydoll

baydoll

New Member
Chain729 said:
marriage is nothing more than legal binding these days. Even when it wasn't, the ceremony didn't change the emotion, did it? When you have courts tell the police to kindly remove someone from your residence, come to talk to me. Until then, don't try to go there.
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So if you've never been married and clearly do not know me nor my situation, how do you know what you've gone through is worse than what I went through?
 
Chain729

Chain729

CageKicker Extraordinaire
baydoll said:
So if you've never been married and clearly do not know me nor my situation, how do you know what you've gone through is worse than what I went through?
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:yawn: look at what you posted dumb***, that's what I have to go by. How about saying something worthwhile, not just "your words mean nothing because you aren't stupid enough to get married like I am."
 
baydoll

baydoll

New Member
Chain729 said:
:yawn: look at what you posted dumb***, that's what I have to go by. How about saying something worthwhile, not just "your words mean nothing because you aren't stupid enough to get married like I am."
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:lmao:

You're right, I WAS stupid enough to get married. Chain, whatever you do, NEVER EVER marry anyone. :whistle:
 
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