Spanking
- Thread starter Geek
- Start date
See? Now wouldn't you have felt bad if one of your siblings had taken the first butt-whipping for YOUR bad behavior?itsbob said:
With our kids it's "fess up because you'll REALLY get it if you lie to me." And they understood that even when they were very young.
"Emilie, what would have happened had you just told the truth in the first place?"
"You'd have been angry and fussed at me, then I'd have had to clean it up/give it back/make it right."
"So what are you grounded for?"
"Lying about it."
pixiegirl
Cleopatra Jones
Geek said:pixiegirl, I think you are bright and well spoken. I bet money that you would rock non-spanking parenting
The oldest is damn near the perfect child. He got a spanking a couple weeks ago for throwing his first real temper tantrum (screaming and throwing things in his room with the babe sleeping in the next room), other then that I can't even remember the last time I had to spank him.
The babe on the other hand is God's punishment for being a rotten ass teen myself. If he'd of been my first, he'd of been my last.
The policy of punishing worse for lying about it had two effects on my family.vraiblonde said:
It taught ME never to lie, because it'd always be worse, and Mom and Dad always found out, sooner or later.
It taught my younger siblings - lie *better* and you'll get off scot-free, because if they find out months from now, they won't care.
My older sister took advantage of this situation when one of my foster brothers tried to blackmail her because he caught her smoking. She went straight to my parents, confessed her smoking - and my foster brother's blackmail. Pretty ballsy for a 14-year-old, but she'd rather be punished by my parents than let a 9 year old screw with her.
sockgirl77
Well-Known Member
Because they are probably heathens.nomoney said:So you don't have a serious answer?
Be patient.pixiegirl said:
I never smacked my kids for throwing their food when they were that young. It's simply fun for them and they don't mean any harm in it. Once the feeding stopped and the goofing around started, that was the end of mealtime. I took the plate and the food away from him/her and said, "Look, when you're finished eating there's no need to throw your plate on the floor. A simple 'done' will suffice.
" Then give them something else to play with while the rest of us finish eating.My piss-offs came after they were old enough to know better, but did it anyway. Like the now 16-year-old and her excruciating table manners.
We were on the prowl for her at every meal until she was probably 14 or so, waiting to catch her talking with food in her mouth, propping her elbows on the table, chewing with her mouth open. The other kids were like vultures...waiting... 
A girl after my own heartSamSpade said:
Geek
New Member
nomoney said:So you don't have a serious answer?
Actually, that is my serious answer. I get on their level and talk to them. When they were real young we had a time out. If they were babies I didn't let them out of my sight so I could redirect unwanted behavior. It has been a hard ass job. My kids, so far, are good kids because of it. I don't lose it with them. It is one of the hardest things to do as a tired, busy adult. I think that my kids are the most important energy I am putting on this earth. I have got to try my best. I am also crazy about them, as people I think they are fantastic. I respect them. I want them to have positive memories of me. I want them to feel safe in my arms at all times, even when they have misbehaved. I work at it every day and not every day is perfect.
Last edited:
sockgirl77
Well-Known Member
No need. Your kids are going to be so scard shiatless by all those damn ghost you've got following you that they'll never step out of line!BuddyLee said:I'll be spanking my kids.
Club'nBabySeals
Where are my pants?
I plan on spanking my children every evening--whether they need it or not--just to ensure that they didn't get away with something. Kids are sneaky!
Seriously, though, I wholeheartedly support spanking as a means of discipline. Some of the best lessons I ever learned were at the receiving end of my father's leather belt. The key is not to act out in anger; but rather to calmly administer the punishment and ensure that the child understands which transgression merited it, and why.
Seriously, though, I wholeheartedly support spanking as a means of discipline. Some of the best lessons I ever learned were at the receiving end of my father's leather belt. The key is not to act out in anger; but rather to calmly administer the punishment and ensure that the child understands which transgression merited it, and why.
ajhkmr97
TexasPride1977
Here are my thoughts. Now before anyone gets the smart idea that I am trying to tell others how to raise their children - I'm not. I am also referring to ONLY younger children – not teens.
As Camily said, "Parental involvement is key" to raising a child. I also think that anger management may play a key role as well. If a parent does not display anger when their child needs disciplining - I think that it is possible that the child would be more focused on why they were being punished instead of just how peeved off they made their mom or dad. I say this based on my own experiences growing up. Perhaps it is all about approach. I agree that not all kids are receptive to the same forms of punishment (as some have stated) - as all kids are not made from the same cookie cutter. Parents need to understand their kids.... some moms/dads know what is wrong with their baby from hearing it cry but once that child becomes a toddler - the mom/dad does not recognize the cry any more - why could this be the case? Again - its parental involvement. Parents who interact and communicate with their children - know their children and their needs. As babies, parents are in constant contact and consistently interact with the baby. When the baby becomes more self sufficient – the parent backs away (from my experiences). My daughter is now 20mo and still throws food from her highchair….its frustrating because she knows not to do it because I’ve tole her “NO!” and spat her hand - but she does it anyways…. Then I learned why she did it and what to do. She was doing it because she was either finished eating or did not want to eat what was in front of her. Because I did not give her much attention when she was eating – she would throw the food from her chair – knowing that I would react to her actions. So, to overcome all the food throwing (and I have yet to perfect the method) I just keep an eye on her to see if she is eating and when she gets to the point to where she is playing and not eating – then I remove her food. My only problem is that putting her in the chair to eat is a convenience for me when I have to get other things done…..and I don’t always watch her as close because of that….and therefore….she still throws food….***sighs*** perhaps it is just a vicious circle….lol
Spanking is not "beating" and when it gets to the point to where the spankings are more like beatings - who is at fault? What should be done at that point? How does a parent keep it from happening the next time? I think that parents who control their anger have more ability in disciplining their children than when their anger is allowed to surface - for the child to see it. I'm not sure who may agree with that statement but I think it is true. Talking to the child about what they did and why it was wrong.... and ensuring that the child understands why they are being spanked is important!!!! .......
................but wait........... if the child understands why they are being spanked.......then are they old enough to understand that they cannot watch TV or play a game (etc) because of their infraction? If they are old enough.... is spanking really an effective method of disciplining at that point or is it more of a way for the parent to enact on their anger? Personally, spanking should be done only with your hand. Once it gets to the point to where your hand starts hurting from all the spanking – the child may be old enough to use leverage as punishment and you can give the hand a rest.
=======================================
Ok... I’ve made a bunch of statements and injected my opinion of things.... again...I don’t want anyone to jump up with a post stating that I am telling them how to parent...I'm not.... (there are some who are pretty sensitive here from what I've observed)
As Camily said, "Parental involvement is key" to raising a child. I also think that anger management may play a key role as well. If a parent does not display anger when their child needs disciplining - I think that it is possible that the child would be more focused on why they were being punished instead of just how peeved off they made their mom or dad. I say this based on my own experiences growing up. Perhaps it is all about approach. I agree that not all kids are receptive to the same forms of punishment (as some have stated) - as all kids are not made from the same cookie cutter. Parents need to understand their kids.... some moms/dads know what is wrong with their baby from hearing it cry but once that child becomes a toddler - the mom/dad does not recognize the cry any more - why could this be the case? Again - its parental involvement. Parents who interact and communicate with their children - know their children and their needs. As babies, parents are in constant contact and consistently interact with the baby. When the baby becomes more self sufficient – the parent backs away (from my experiences). My daughter is now 20mo and still throws food from her highchair….its frustrating because she knows not to do it because I’ve tole her “NO!” and spat her hand - but she does it anyways…. Then I learned why she did it and what to do. She was doing it because she was either finished eating or did not want to eat what was in front of her. Because I did not give her much attention when she was eating – she would throw the food from her chair – knowing that I would react to her actions. So, to overcome all the food throwing (and I have yet to perfect the method) I just keep an eye on her to see if she is eating and when she gets to the point to where she is playing and not eating – then I remove her food. My only problem is that putting her in the chair to eat is a convenience for me when I have to get other things done…..and I don’t always watch her as close because of that….and therefore….she still throws food….***sighs*** perhaps it is just a vicious circle….lol
Spanking is not "beating" and when it gets to the point to where the spankings are more like beatings - who is at fault? What should be done at that point? How does a parent keep it from happening the next time? I think that parents who control their anger have more ability in disciplining their children than when their anger is allowed to surface - for the child to see it. I'm not sure who may agree with that statement but I think it is true. Talking to the child about what they did and why it was wrong.... and ensuring that the child understands why they are being spanked is important!!!! .......
................but wait........... if the child understands why they are being spanked.......then are they old enough to understand that they cannot watch TV or play a game (etc) because of their infraction? If they are old enough.... is spanking really an effective method of disciplining at that point or is it more of a way for the parent to enact on their anger? Personally, spanking should be done only with your hand. Once it gets to the point to where your hand starts hurting from all the spanking – the child may be old enough to use leverage as punishment and you can give the hand a rest.
=======================================
Ok... I’ve made a bunch of statements and injected my opinion of things.... again...I don’t want anyone to jump up with a post stating that I am telling them how to parent...I'm not.... (there are some who are pretty sensitive here from what I've observed)