MysticalMom
Witchy Woman
pixiegirl said:She just copied off my very first response in MMs thread.
Spanking
- Thread starter Geek
- Start date
Softballkid
No Longer the Kid
MysticalMom said:
Will you spank me if I come by for lunch.... but Im only coming if you promise......
itsbob
I bowl overhand
It worked for me.. and then you have to look at the frame of mind of the person that did the frosting.. I think mom was having a REALLY bad day at the time, and called for back-up.
AND the rule of law is.. punish for the SMALL infractions, and you'll never have to punish for the BIG ones.
Gulliani's way of enforcing the rules.. he did nothing(to speak of) to enforce laws concerning murder, rape or aremed robbery, yet the numbers of violent crime dropped drastically while he was mayor of NY.. how did he do it?
He told the po-leece to enforce the little laws. Jay-walking, open containers, loitering, littering.. etc.. told them to do their jobs and enforce ALL the rules.. in turn the statistics for violent crime dropped.
Same should apply to children, enforce the small rules, you won't have to worry about the big ones..
AND the rule of law is.. punish for the SMALL infractions, and you'll never have to punish for the BIG ones.
Gulliani's way of enforcing the rules.. he did nothing(to speak of) to enforce laws concerning murder, rape or aremed robbery, yet the numbers of violent crime dropped drastically while he was mayor of NY.. how did he do it?
He told the po-leece to enforce the little laws. Jay-walking, open containers, loitering, littering.. etc.. told them to do their jobs and enforce ALL the rules.. in turn the statistics for violent crime dropped.
Same should apply to children, enforce the small rules, you won't have to worry about the big ones..
citysherry
I Need a Beer
pixiegirl said:She just copied off my very first response in MMs thread.
I have a question for the non spankers.... What do you do to a child that is too young to reason with or embarrass? GM (18 months old) has taken to throwing his plate off the dinner table when he's done. I smack his hand, he cries, he does not get his plate back nor anything else to eat for the rest of the evening. I will let him have his cup of juice.
A spank on the hand doesn’t teach him what he should do with his plate when he’s finished eating. He needs a lesson on what he should do with his plate - I would make him retrieve his plate from the floor (obviously with help, if needed) and show him he can either put his plate in the sink or show him how to put it in the dishwasher and then praise him when he’s finished. Of course, it will take several times of doing this (consistency) and he’ll need your help but eventually, he’ll understand not to toss his plate.
pearlie369
UnStAbLe YeT sAfE
I was not one of those 'angels' that only got spanked a few times...I got it regularly, but I always deserved it. Got the belt once all the other times was the hand or a wood spoon, never got abused or beaten just taught to not do whatever it was again. I think spanking is a good thing, kids need to be taught to treat everything with respect and deal with the consenquinces of thier actions. The whole "Im disappointed in you" thing never worked on me, and lets face it with most kids today that won't work either. Point is I was spanked and my kids will be too if they act anything like I did when I was thier age.
Geek said:
i grew one of 4 girls. if someone did something wrong and didnt fess up to it, my goodness look out we all go it till someone told the truth.
We got to get switches off the trees outside and could choose wether or not to leave the leaves on or take them off. Belts, lets not discuss them.
Now, when my boys were growing up (not that they are all that grown up 18 & 22) I would spank them, not the way my dad did.
I tell my dad the stuff he did to us, is considered child abuse these days. He tells me and you turned out just fine. Which in all honesty, I dont think it hurt me one bit.
pixiegirl
Cleopatra Jones
citysherry said:
Ha! You haven't seen this child. He's smart and knows what to do. He's 18 months old and still in a high chair thus can not get up to put his plate in the sink. And when "he's" done is not when the rest of us are done. I refuse to let the babe run the routine. He will eat what he wants to (usually the carb, pasta, bread, etc) and throw the rest. This is two fold bad because we have a dog that is allergic to corn so if he throws a plate with corn on it she's bound to consume some before I can clean it up and thus gets the craps. I'm not trying to teach him what to do with his plate when he's done, again he's 18 months old; I'm enforcing that throwing dishes is bad.
He was (see was) throwing cups as well and not just at the table. You open the fridge, get the bottle of juice, milk, etc, he goes for the bottled water or beer or a can of soda. I take whatever he's grabbed while I was getting the juice and put it back, proceed to getting him a sippy cup of juice and hand it to him, he chucks it across the kitchen because it's not what he wanted. He's not even old enough to understand that he didn't really want the beer he grabbed he just wanted it because it's different I suppose. A few good slaps on the hand and majically the cup throwing has pretty much stopped.
Chasey_Lane
Salt Life
Exactly, and I don't know of any 18 month-old that can. You cannot expect a baby to do something he's physically not capable of. While it may work for a toddler (3-4), I think you're doing the right thing now.pixiegirl said:
Mine used to dump his plate at that age. He got a swift smack on the hand, and his plate wasn't returned to him. He figured it out. 
W
Wenchy
Guest
I was an angel at school, and never got that big wooden paddle. 
On several occasions, while quite young, I misbehaved at home. I waited all day for my dad to get home, wondering whether I would get the wooden spoon or the leather belt. Both were bad, and I think I still have splinters embedded in my butt. The particular misbehavior never happened again.
I'm a strict parent, and there are very clear rules here. Time-out has been effective with my two, but they have each been spanked several times over the years. I wouldn't hesitate to swat them again if the situation warranted it. I use my hand, and nothing else.
I wouldn't spank about a frosting issue (not that I bake, or frost much) but if one of my kids did that, they simply wouldn't get cake.
On several occasions, while quite young, I misbehaved at home. I waited all day for my dad to get home, wondering whether I would get the wooden spoon or the leather belt. Both were bad, and I think I still have splinters embedded in my butt. The particular misbehavior never happened again.
I'm a strict parent, and there are very clear rules here. Time-out has been effective with my two, but they have each been spanked several times over the years. I wouldn't hesitate to swat them again if the situation warranted it. I use my hand, and nothing else.
I wouldn't spank about a frosting issue (not that I bake, or frost much) but if one of my kids did that, they simply wouldn't get cake.
dustin
UAIOE
I got my azz beat with a belt, hand, wooden spoon, spatula...uh...ping pong paddle, book, hmmm...i think those were the favorites...
I wasnt as bad as my brothers though, so it didnt happen very often. Most of the time it was from us bros fighting with each other, not from me not listening or doing what I was told.
AFter the spanking I would have to go tell my brother(s) I was sorry. And they had to say I forgive you.
sometimes I was sent to my room..
Rarely got an allowance so I never had a chance to get that taken away.
I remember the TV privilages being suspended...
I recall being punished up (in one form or another) until I was in junior high. I wasnt bad enough to warrant punishment from then on. Maybe a sharp scolding. My brothers were a different story on the other hand.
Yes I will spank my child when the time calls for it. (See Nickel's post)
I wasnt as bad as my brothers though, so it didnt happen very often. Most of the time it was from us bros fighting with each other, not from me not listening or doing what I was told.
AFter the spanking I would have to go tell my brother(s) I was sorry. And they had to say I forgive you.
sometimes I was sent to my room..
Rarely got an allowance so I never had a chance to get that taken away.
I remember the TV privilages being suspended...
I recall being punished up (in one form or another) until I was in junior high. I wasnt bad enough to warrant punishment from then on. Maybe a sharp scolding. My brothers were a different story on the other hand.
Yes I will spank my child when the time calls for it. (See Nickel's post)
Last edited:
oldman
Lobster Land
Mom used a belt on me. Obviously I deserved it but it apparently didn't have much effect because she used it on me several different times. My Dad worked so he didn't get involved except one time. He caught me sticking cattails in a gas can on the back porch, lighting them and throwing them. He told me to get in bed and swatted my butt a couple of times as I was climbing the stairs. It didn't hurt but I cried more than getting the belt. Guess I thought of him as the authority figure and just the fact he was mad at me made me feel terrible. Spanking of any type needs to agreed upon by both parents also. In my second marriage the wife didn't agree with it and I did - that didn't work out to well. I was also a single parent of two boys for a number of years and one of the boys kept getting into trouble. I think spanking him was a release of my frustrations or else I would have exploded. To spank or not spank, it's totally up to the parent(s). Spank if you want, just don't go beyond and turn it into abuse. Maybe that's why we, well a lot of people, have big butts - to absorb getting swatted now and then..
Nanny Pam
************
Pete said:Yea AND in the GA public school system back then they would bust your ass too. All they needed was 3 minutes and another teacher as a witness.
You know we never had kids mouth off to teachers, hit teachers, threaten teachers, pull guns, knives, or destroy stuff just for fun. You think that was just a coincidence?
I totally agree!
I was - but only for a short time - mainly between the ages of 2-7. By the time I was 8, it didn't even hurt anymore, and I only pretended to cry, because by that time, a spanking was an EASY punishment. It was over quickly, it didn't even hurt anymore, and no more punishment after that. I don't think spanking has much value for a kid past 4 or 5 unless he's totally out of control.Geek said:
(On the other hand - for a short time after I was eight - my dad did occasionally hit out of sheer anger - something he didn't do before or since. More than once I felt his belt across the back of my legs, and once he cracked me in the face. Of course, that was because he told me to shovel the walk and I basically told him to stick it where the sun don't shine.)
I don't have any kids yet - but I have two feelings about spanking. One is, you do it for small children when they are doing something that you cannot afford to happen twice - such as repeated attempts to stick a fork in the electric socket or running out into the middle of the road or trying to climb out the window. I believe this, because unlike throwing food or hitting their sister, you cannot risk having it happen too often, and you have to reinforce the idea that they must NEVER do that.
The other one is, there's a small range of ages and a small number of infractions for which it is relevant. It should never be a "beating", it should never be done in anger, it should be brief, and if they're old enough to understand, you should make sure they know why they're being spanked. These are the general guidelines my own parents took; when I was being bad, I was told I'd be spanked after dinnner - not immediately. The dread leading UP to the spanking was at least as bad as three smacks on the fanny ever could be.
I also don't think you should spank or even punish kids for accidents or carelessness. When a kid spills his milk, he's being a kid. When he looks at you and pours it on the floor, he's being disobedient.
But from my own experience and observation, younger than a certain age, it's pointless. Older than a certain age, it's pointless (and for me, kind of beneficial, because like I said, it didn't hurt and was basically a free ride).
sockgirl77
Well-Known Member
How do you grow girls?BOHDEN said:
pixiegirl
Cleopatra Jones
SamSpade said:
For the most part I totally agree. The rare occasion Noah does get a smack down I try to NEVER do it in anger and I always always talk to him afterwards. Spanking is also not a lone punishment. I don't want his little butt sitting on the couch watching tv while he's crying over his spanking. He's being punished so on top of the spanking he goes to his room to think about why he got the spanking and is allowed to come out when he's done crying and is ready to talk about it. He's a bright kid and knows why he got the spanking. My first question is ALWAYS "Noah, why did mommy spank you?" Followed by us talking it over and me explaining what the appropriate behavior would have been.
I had a recollection a few years back of an incident with my Dad. As the years went by, my understanding of the event totally changed.pixiegirl said:
My dad was all of about 28 at the time and I was 6. He was frustrated, because spanking didn't seem to work (although I was still afraid of it). He looked at me and said "what's the worst thing I could do to you?". He stared at me. With tears down my face, and trembling I squeaked out "I guess you could KILL me". He turned his face away, and I could see his body shaking.
At the time, I remembered thinking "oh boy he is REALLY MAD!".
I realize now, as an adult, he was doing exactly what I would have been doing ...*LAUGHING*. Quietly of course....