Spanking

[Nickel]

Maybe their parenting skills lack in other areas, and it's not the lack of spanking that does it? My sisters kids are no better than anyone else's and they readily spank and in my opinion are kinda mean sometimes (God I hope she doesn't read this, lol). Our parenting styles are completely different yet, our kids are very similar.

I think it's finding out which type of punishment works best and using it consistently. If a kid doesn't respond well to spanking, then spanking them isn't going to work. Same for kids that don't respond well to time-outs or reasoning. :shrug:

 

[Chasey_Lane]

Maybe their parenting skills lack in other areas, and it's not the lack of spanking that does it?

I'm sure it is. But my daughter knew at an early age that she would get a hand across her butt if she didn't behave. Yes, she was given warning(s), and then I meant business.

 

[cege]

Emotionally disturbed kids will kick the living shiat out of you and they are special ed. I have two kids. I have not hit them. I will not hit them. I really don't care if other people hit their kids. Whack the crap out of them I got the living crap beat out of me growing up. Hubby did not. I liked his way better so that is what we are doing.

My husband got spanked and worse. He talks about it and gets upset. I was proabably a wimp but all my dad had to do was yell at me and I cried so spanking wasn't necessary. Since my husband was spanked he decided he would not spank our kids. We have good kids and they both listen. My son is 15 and my daughter is 9.

 

[Chasey_Lane]

I think it's finding out which type of punishment works best and using it consistently. If a kid doesn't respond well to spanking, then spanking them isn't going to work. Same for kids that don't respond well to time-outs or reasoning. :shrug:

That's 100% true!

 

[vraiblonde]

I was almost never hit as a child. My grandmother paddled me a time or two and my great-grandmother used to smack us on the back of the legs with a fly-swatter

My grandfather never laid a hand on me or raised his voice. He could shame me to tears just by looking at me. My Mom would be all yelling and going crazy and I'd be like But the minute I heard my Grandfather - "Saaam...." - instant remorse.

 

[camily]

I think it's finding out which type of punishment works best and using it consistently. If a kid doesn't respond well to spanking, then spanking them isn't going to work. Same for kids that don't respond well to time-outs or reasoning. :shrug:

I totally agree with that.

 

[MysticalMom]

I think it's finding out which type of punishment works best and using it consistently. If a kid doesn't respond well to spanking, then spanking them isn't going to work. Same for kids that don't respond well to time-outs or reasoning. :shrug:

Nickel is so smart!

Spanking my 8 year old is pointless. She doesn't care. As the youngest and toughest of the 4 she's really rough and tumble. As a matter of fact she even laughed at my spanking once. Now.... put her in time out away from everyone and the action and you'd think you've killed her.

 

[MDTerps]

I have spanked my son in the past. I have a short fuse and and probably jumped the gun a few times that he really didn't need to be spanked. There for I just send him to his room give myself time to breath and then talk to him about the situation. If it's bad enough I just take away things that he really likes. It seems to workout better for the both of us.
I as a child can only remember one time my dad spanked my brother and I with a belt. My mom would pop me in the mouth in a heartbeat, (hince the short fuse.. wonder where I got that from). It got my attention but it also made me feel unloved by her. The story runs deeper then I wish to get into, but that's another reason I don't spank my son any more. I don't want him to feel that way.
Like most of you have pointed out, each person is different and different punishments get their kids attention.
I'm not against it, to each's own.

 

[itsbob]

HE!! YES.. and had to go get the belt, so I KNEW what was coming. And youhave to picture my dad.. 6'4" tall, about 350 lbs (after he recovered from his second trip to Vietnam), and I still make some of life's decisions, with his voice reminding me to make the right choice.

and when my dad was deployed for one his ecxtended trips to Vietnam, or Korea, we (mom and the three of us kids) always moved back home to CT to be around her family.. Now don't get me wrong, I think generally we TRIED to behave in his absence, but if we screwed up, the Uncles were there to do the fill in azzwhoopin..

Strange, I have a memory of one day in Ct, where I ate the frosting off of a birthday cake.. and I remember all of us kids lining up, "If you don't confess I'll beat all of you".. well lo and behold he just happened to start with me... and damn if I didn't confess during THAT beating.. but the strange part is, I remember if being my dad, but it couldn't have been him, he was in the jungle at the time. OH, and I never stuck my fingers into cake frosting again.

 

[camily]

I'm sure it is. But my daughter knew at an early age that she would get a hand across her butt if she didn't behave. Yes, she was given warning(s), and then I meant business.

I agree. My kids have all gotten swatted on occasion as well so I am not totally opposed to "attention getting" swats.
I heard someone saw once ( I think it was John Mellencamp) that if you hit your kids more than two (maybe it was three) times for a particular behavior it was more about your anger than over their behavior. I liked that.

 

[MysticalMom]

And I want to add...I call my mom a lot to say Thank You! I never understood why she was so crazy until I had 4 of my own.

 

[mainman]

I ought to whip your ass for starting this thread taking away attention from my thread...

 

[camily]

and when my dad was deployed for one his ecxtended trips to Vietnam, or Korea, we (mom and the three of us kids) always moved back home to CT to be around her family.. Now don't get me wrong, I think generally we TRIED to behave in his absence, but if we screwed up, the Uncles were there to do the fill in azzwhoopin..

Strange, I have a memory of one day in Ct, where I ate the frosting off of a birthday cake.. and I remember all of us kids lining up, "If you don't confess I'll beat all of you".. well lo and behold he just happened to start with me... and damn if I didn't confess during THAT beating.. but the strange part is, I remember if being my dad, but it couldn't have been him, he was in the jungle at the time. OH, and I never stuck my fingers into cake frosting again.

Do you think that a kid eating frosting is really a cause for an azz whoopin' now?

 

[camily]

I ought to whip your ass for starting this thread taking away attention from my thread...

 

[MysticalMom]

and when my dad was deployed for one his ecxtended trips to Vietnam, or Korea, we (mom and the three of us kids) always moved back home to CT to be around her family.. Now don't get me wrong, I think generally we TRIED to behave in his absence, but if we screwed up, the Uncles were there to do the fill in azzwhoopin..

Strange, I have a memory of one day in Ct, where I ate the frosting off of a birthday cake.. and I remember all of us kids lining up, "If you don't confess I'll beat all of you".. well lo and behold he just happened to start with me... and damn if I didn't confess during THAT beating.. but the strange part is, I remember if being my dad, but it couldn't have been him, he was in the jungle at the time. OH, and I never stuck my fingers into cake frosting again.

All 5 of us got a a$$ whoopin' once for some paint splotches on the garage door. No one would own up.

25 years later we're sitting around the dinner table at my parents talking about it and my brother Chris says, "Oh yeah, that was me." So we all ganged up on him and beat his a$$.

 

[pixiegirl]

Nickel is so smart!

Spanking my 8 year old is pointless. She doesn't care. As the youngest and toughest of the 4 she's really rough and tumble. As a matter of fact she even laughed at my spanking once. Now.... put her in time out away from everyone and the action and you'd think you've killed her.

She just copied off my very first response in MMs thread.

I have a question for the non spankers.... What do you do to a child that is too young to reason with or embarrass? GM (18 months old) has taken to throwing his plate off the dinner table when he's done. I smack his hand, he cries, he does not get his plate back nor anything else to eat for the rest of the evening. I will let him have his cup of juice.

 

[BadGirl]

I must have been an because I don't recall ever getting a beating, although I'm sure that I probably deserved a smackdown a time or two.

 

[Nickel]

She just copied off my very first response in MMs thread.

I've had that theory since my son was about a year old, and have been vocal about it on here on many occasions.

 

[itsbob]

Do you think that a kid eating frosting is really a cause for an azz whoopin' now?

It worked for me.. and then you have to look at the frame of mind of the person that did the frosting.. I think mom was having a REALLY bad day at the time, and called for back-up.


AND the rule of law is.. punish for the SMALL infractions, and you'll never have to punish for the BIG ones..

 

[itsbob]

I must have been an because I don't recall ever getting a beating, although I'm sure that I probably deserved a smackdown a time or two.

But you've been spanked...