What would you do?

[Queenofdenile1]

You boo hoo about someone being all up in your business. Make false accusations about someone then do the same. :shrug:

And proudly too!


Well, I've been friends with my guy friends for 10+ years. Now, I'm not saying that none of them would not bang me if granted the opportunity. But, they are only just my friends. There's nothing wrong with having and keeping friends of the opposite sex. If your bf's did not trust you enough to have male friends, than that's his issue, not yours. You were never truly those men's friends if you dumped them for some man you dated. :shrug:

Well, I'd see how it goes. I wouldn't necessarily just dump everyone but put the boyfriend in the loop. It's kinda hard to say exactly when I'm not in that position at the moment. Most of my male friends now don't call me on the phone anyway, more like drinking friends. See them occasionally but thats all.

 

[sockgirl77]

false accusations, you have no idea what you are talking about
but then again i guess anyone with 3 kids with 3 different daddies should be a lil jaded

My kids do not have 3 different daddies. My point...

 

[CalvertNewbie]

I used to feel that way. The thing is most of my "male friends", weren't friends. They were pretending to be my friend. You can have platonic relationships but doesn't mean there aren't "sexual" thoughts running through their minds. It's the nature of the beast. In all fairness to my boyfriend, yeah, I might just have to give up the male friendships or include my new boyfriend in the group.

I'd include the boyfriend in the group - he should know your friends and you should know his. As for getting rid of all your male friends because of a new boyfriend's insecurity, that's wrong if they are indeed "just friends". I'm glad hubby and I trust eachother because I made it clear from the second I met him that my friends, male & female, are here to stay. Most friendships outlast most relationships anyway (at least until you find the right guy) so I wouldn't want to lose my friends for a relationship that may not last anyway.

 

[kom526]

Nobody knows why he gave his number to the "other woman".

 

[sockgirl77]

Nobody knows why he gave his number to the "other woman".

Nope. But apparently, the "other woman" wanted to bang at 2am.

 

[(((echo)))]

My kids do not have 3 different daddies. My point...

ahh but see therein lies the whole thing....all it takes is 1 person who knows the actual truth to spout out some stupid bs....
and then the rumors start flying, with out ever validating wether or not the rumor is actual bs or not.

 

[poster]

VERY TRUE statement... my ex blamed me for his cheating... i went crazy all over that defense... but then, through counseling and scripture reading... he was right... if you keep your spouse satisfied, there is no reason for them to ever consider going elsewhere...and they wont. now grant it...i had what i thought were very good reasons to keep to myself and not care about his needs.. his drinking was just his #1 love...and i didnt feel love towards him because of that. I loved him with all my heart and soul - but he loved the drink more. i shut down and he wandered. he was an honest man prior to the drinking... i used to feel he would NEVER cheat on me... EVER...but when you're out there drunk and alone, i guess it definitely could open the door to others....whatever. it's all in the past now and i've learned more about myself. he's still drinking and i'm moving forward. we're still friends and i'm not bitter. life is grand when we all allow ourselves to move on...

Did a counselor (sp?) actually justify that statement?
I don't believe that line of thinking at all.
Granted everyone has needs but if I'm not "satisfied" I'd break off before I'd seek satisfaction some where else.

 

[Queenofdenile1]

I'd include the boyfriend in the group - he should know your friends and you should know his. As for getting rid of all your male friends because of a new boyfriend's insecurity, that's wrong if they are indeed "just friends". I'm glad hubby and I trust eachother because I made it clear from the second I met him that my friends, male & female, are here to stay. Most friendships outlast most relationships anyway (at least until you find the right guy) so I wouldn't want to lose my friends for a relationship that may not last anyway.

That is true. You lose yourself that way. I'd include the boyfriend in the group.

 

[kom526]

Did a counselor (sp?) actually justify that statement?
I don't believe that line of thinking at all.
Granted everyone has needs but if I'm not "satisfied" I'd break off before I'd seek satisfaction some where else.

You test drive cars before you buy don't you?

 

[nomoney]

ahh but see therein lies the whole thing....all it takes is 1 person who knows the actual truth to spout out some stupid bs....
and then the rumors start flying, with out ever validating wether or not the rumor is actual bs or not.

Really? But that never happens around here now does it? Oh wait...........

 

[(((echo)))]

Really? But that never happens around here now does it? Oh wait...........

I said that this thread was full of hypocrites.....i do believe i implied myself as well.
but hey...i'm just sayin
ok...im bored with this tread....have a great day

 

[sockgirl77]

ahh but see therein lies the whole thing....all it takes is 1 person who knows the actual truth to spout out some stupid bs....
and then the rumors start flying, with out ever validating wether or not the rumor is actual bs or not.

Rumors? You posted pages of someone's personal business without knowing the truth. Then YOU accused them of getting into your business. Then you have the nerve to call me jaded.

 

[poster]

You test drive cars before you buy don't you?

Yes but she's refering to a husband. He's already bought, get rid of the ride and then get a new model.

 

[lovinmaryland]

false accusations, you have no idea what you are talking about
but then again i guess anyone with 3 kids with 3 different daddies should be a lil jaded

People in glass houses shouldnt throw stones

 

[greeneyes36]

Oh honey, I'm so sorry for you.

Oh, dont feel sorry for ME. I'm not the one thinking all men are liars and cheats. i've moved on with my life and I've learned there are men out there
who believe in fidelity. You should try it some time... move on.. forgive those who have done you wrong, even if they havent asked you to. It's truly amazing the life you could have once you have forgiven them.... to be held in bondage of all that crap you went through?? who wouldnt want to be free from that?

 

[nomoney]

I said that this thread was full of hypocrites.....i do believe i implied myself as well.
but hey...i'm just sayin
ok...im bored with this tread....have a great day

But if you implied yourself, why did you question someone else lumping you into that category as well? oh wait you're done with this thread.....

 

[Queenofdenile1]

Oh honey, I'm so sorry for you.

Oh, dont feel sorry for ME. I'm not the one thinking all men are liars and cheats. i've moved on with my life and I've learned there are men out there
who believe in fidelity. You should try it some time... move on.. forgive those who have done you wrong, even if they havent asked you to. It's truly amazing the life you could have once you have forgiven them.... to be held in bondage of all that crap you went through?? who wouldnt want to be free from that?

Oh, I have forgiven, but the guard will always be up. I'm too jaded at this point in my life. Too many years and too many things. It would seriously have to take a very special man for me to overcome the past. Thanks though.

 

[Cowgirl]

If you were keeping them satisfied they wouldn't be cheating. You said that you had multiple men cheat on you. I'm just saying...

C'mon Socki, that's crap. If a person is unhappy in a relationship, he/she can always leave. It's not the woman's fault if the man cheats and vice versa.

 

[greeneyes36]

Oh, I have forgiven, but the guard will always be up. I'm too jaded at this point in my life.

Nah - IMHO, you're still bitter and resentful and havent forgiven anyone..not even yourself. if you were, all your posts would portray a much happier person. that's not a guard, that's bitterness.

 

[sockgirl77]

C'mon Socki, that's crap. If a person is unhappy in a relationship, he/she can always leave. It's not the woman's fault if the man cheats and vice versa.

There HAS to be something wrong with her if so many men have cheated on her. :shrug: