Buying a house together w/o being married...

[Softballkid]

But you lived in it didn't you?

Before B and I bought our houses I lived in his. He paid the mortgage and I paid all the utilities, paid for all the groceries and Walmart crap, paid the car insurance, etc. It was an inexpensive house and I paid out more per month then he did by far. Had we split I'd of gotten nothing out of it. On the other hand hadn't I lived there I'd of been paying rent to live somewhere else. So it really wasn't money lost cause I would have spent it anyway.

Yes ma'am....and I paid for about 75% of everything, I paid most of the bills, because I made more, and I wanted her to save her for school and all that kinda crap...the only thing she paid was the phone, internet, cable, and somtimes beer..haha.. other than that, I paid for everything else...I get suckerd'd into sh*t sometimes

 

[Chasey_Lane]

in your opinion is that a legit reason to not buy a house with someone?

He doesn't need a reason to not buy a house with you. It's his choice whether he does/doesn't. However, maybe you should take a look from the outside and I'm sure you'll see his future doesn't have you in it.

 

[kwillia]

whats the point?? If im not responsible financially on the mortgage I dont wanna be on the deed.

Our incomes combined would qualify us for a $400k house!! But his dumb ass wants to do it all alone because he doesn't trust me. When I ask the reason for lack of trust it has NOTHING to do with finances....

in your opinion is that a legit reason to not buy a house with someone?

I would be on guard if someone screwed me financially not relationship wise 2 years ago.

It doesn't sound as if he wants you to buy the house with him... it sounds as if he expects you to simply pay rent while you live there. He plans to finance it. He plans to be solo on the deed. He isn't even using you to validate credit... he is buying the house and offering to rent to you... sounds simple to me...:shrug:

 

[Qurious]

You can always just go for it for now... but where will you live come spring...:shrug:

Plan B: Move in with my sister and her rugrats and loser boyfriend of 10 years in their 3 story townhome.

Plan C: Move back to New York & start over.

 

[itsbob]

and I know because I lived it.

Well, I'm not a lawyer, but this is the way it was explained to me.. if you have EVER represented yourself as being married.. ie, living together, and CAN be construed as an overnight stay.. then the deed can be assumed to be (can't remember the term) a shared deed the same as a married couple. With the shared benefits of the deed. It's been contested in court a nuber of times.. and the results as far as I know have always been the same.

 

[Softballkid]

and if she sells it or has sold it, you're eligible for half of the money she made on it... Call a lawyer!!

Please explain...cuz we broke up a while back, and she just sold it not to long ago actually... my realtor actually drove me buy it to show it to me, and I was like... uh...NO.... ....

I was there for about a year or so, and we have been over for almost 2 years now...so how can I profit from it...??

 

[Tigerlily]

whats the point?? If im not responsible financially on the mortgage I dont wanna be on the deed.

Our incomes combined would qualify us for a $400k house!! But his dumb ass wants to do it all alone because he doesn't trust me. When I ask the reason for lack of trust it has NOTHING to do with finances....

in your opinion is that a legit reason to not buy a house with someone?

I would be on guard if someone screwed me financially not relationship wise 2 years ago.

Why would you even consider living with someone who doesn't trust you?

 

[bresamil]

Well, I'm not a lawyer, but this is the way it was explained to me.. if you have EVER represented yourself as being married.. ie, living together, and CAN be construed as an overnight stay.. then the deed can be assumed to be (can't remember the term) a shared deed the same as a married couple. With the shared benefits of the deed. It's been contested in court a nuber of times.. and the results as far as I know have always been the same.

Bad Bob! You're running this con on BadGirl aren't you!

 

[Qurious]

One would assume he plans on showing you the curb in the near future and he doesn't want to deal with joint property.

On another note; How can you love someone who doesn't trust you and is not "the best you have had"?

If he can't learn to forgive and move on then yes i can see him getting exhausted and kicking me out and moving on. But me being there NOW proves opposite..he beleives in us, even if it is just a lil bit.

as for your second question:

im still working on that answer *sigh*

 

[dustin]

whats the point?? If im not responsible financially on the mortgage I dont wanna be on the deed.

Our incomes combined would qualify us for a $400k house!! But his dumb ass wants to do it all alone because he doesn't trust me. When I ask the reason for lack of trust it has NOTHING to do with finances....

in your opinion is that a legit reason to not buy a house with someone?

I would be on guard if someone screwed me financially not relationship wise 2 years ago.

Shoot then dont put your name on the deed. You can still live with the guy without being financially liable.

 

[cattitude]

Well, I'm not a lawyer, but this is the way it was explained to me.. if you have EVER represented yourself as being married.. ie, living together, and CAN be construed as an overnight stay.. then the deed can be assumed to be (can't remember the term) a shared deed the same as a married couple. With the shared benefits of the deed. It's been contested in court a nuber of times.. and the results as far as I know have always been the same.

My ex and I bought a house with proceeds from my condo. We were NOT married but married a short time later. My name was not on deed and not on loan. I lived in the house for 2 years as husband and wife and our money was pooled and bills paid. When we split, I got nothing. I did however refuse to give him a divorce. He wanted one, so he sold me & Ott the house at a reeeeaaaallly cheap price. The sale took place a few years after we were divorced.

 

[Pete]

Bad Bob! You're running this con on BadGirl aren't you!

uh o

 

[Nickel]

he beleives in us

No he doesn't. Anyone who says "I don't trust you" doesn't believe in you.

 

[Pete]

If he can't learn to forgive and move on then yes i can see him getting exhausted and kicking me out and moving on. But me being there NOW proves opposite..he beleives in us, even if it is just a lil bit.

as for your second question:

im still working on that answer *sigh*

So you stepped out for new wiener and now he doesn't trust you?

 

[Vince]

Why do you choose to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't trust you?

Yes. I wouldn't buy a home with someone I wasn't married to, but that's my opinion. I sure as hell wouldn't buy a home with someone I didn't trust.

 

[kwillia]

Plan B: Move in with my sister and her rugrats and loser boyfriend of 10 years in their 3 story townhome.

Plan C: Move back to New York & start over.

Then I don't see an issue. He plans to buy a house by himself and he expects you to pay him some rent while you live there. If you two part ways, you pack your bags and leave. He deeded and financed the house. It's his house. Look at it this way, if he is buying "more house" than he can afford simply because he expects to bank part of your income. He can't force you to live there and rent from him for the remainder of the mortgage. If you decide to leave, he can't make you financially responsible for his mortgage payment that he no longer can afford on his own.

 

[Qurious]

Why would you even consider living with someone who doesn't trust you?

He trusts me to certain degrees.

He gives me his credit cards, pin numbers, pass codes to all of his financial business. I pay all the bills in the house right now...

Account numbers, safety deposit boxes...he gives me access to.

But yet you dont trust me when buying a house???

It doesn't make sense.

 

[Qurious]

So you stepped out for new wiener and now he doesn't trust you?

2 years ago when he said it was "over" and had my shyt packed by the door.

Yes.

 

[kwillia]

Bad Bob! You're running this con on BadGirl aren't you!

If I'm not mistaken, BG bought that house before she POWNED Bob... Bob is renting from BG... I don't see it as a con...:shrug:

 

[Qurious]

Shoot then dont put your name on the deed. You can still live with the guy without being financially liable.

what self comfort does that bring me when at any time he can say get your shyt and roll??

Im cleaning a house, putting money in a house that doesn't belong to me!!

I dont know for some people but to my self worth it does NOTHING!!!